


Wasn't expecting that

by Cherrie



Series: I wouldn't change a thing [1]
Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: A little bit of tomlinshaw, A lot of cursing, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Grimmy is teasing them both, Harry Is Oblivious, Harry wears flowers in his hair, Harry wears his hair in all kind of crazy styles, I hate myself for that, I swear to god they're just gross, Louis is pinning through the whole thing, Louis' parents are homophobic douchbags, M/M, Make out practicing, Making homophobes uncomfortable, Or in semi public, Pansexual Harry, Sex Mentions, So he's looking for a guy to piss them off even more, Zayn is shy little bean, Ziall is always having sex in the most weird places, Ziall is the worst, lirry friendship, niall is obnoxious, nouis friendship, zouis friendship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-04
Updated: 2016-12-24
Packaged: 2018-06-03 16:53:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 49,763
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6618631
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cherrie/pseuds/Cherrie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There were two ways of dealing with ignorant, homophobic parents. First one involved talking, explaining and tons of patience, and well noone ever accused Louis of being patient. That's probably why he always chose the second road: instead of reasoning- piss them the fuck off. The only thing he needed was over the top, flamboyant fake boyfriend to make that happened. And while Harry may not be exactly what he was looking for in a fake boyfriend, he is everything he ever wanted in a real one.</p><p> </p><p>Disclaimer: Not real, never happened, also Louis' parents are completely one hundred procent fictional.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Clifford, grandma and two vintage jackets.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ta-daaa! The first chapter of story number 3. I'm on the roll here! And seriously guys thank you so much, I couldn't believe my eyes how the hits count skyrocketed when I posted last chapter of His crazy matches mine. Who did that? :D 
> 
> I hope you like this one too, I'm going to worn out Ziall and all those cliches until I can't breathe. That's just the warning :D 
> 
> Love you guys! xx.

‘Tell me again how this is productive?’ Niall asked sceptically eyeing an ad Louis just printed and intended to hang all over campus.

‘Well Niall you’ve met my parents, so you damn well know the reason why I don’t hang out with them, I mean they did give you the pamphlet for conversion camp when they walked in on you making out with Zayn. The point is, I take their money, I spend it and I don’t want to see them. They’re homophobic piece of shits and now they decided that they come here and they want to make amends. Well I know that story way too well. They will try to ‘fix me’ once again and I’m not having any of that. Which is why I need a boyfriend. And I need someone who will piss the shit out of them.’ Louis said smiling mischieviously.

When his mom called him that she and his dad are coming to visit he could just tell it won’t be pretty. And then he read in the papers that his dad’s main competition’ son is getting married to a lovely socialite in few months, Louis knew that they will try to set him up with his dad’s partner’s daughter. The owner of the one of the most prestigous law firms in the country couldn’t have a gay son. In his parents opinion obviously. Louis spend seventeen years of his life in a closet, and coming out to his parents was the single most difficult thing he’s ever done, so now that he was out he will not be tip toeing back, not for his parents, not for anyone. He just couldn’t wait until he will finish with uni and get a paid job. He was working as an intern in BBC Radio 1 for a year now, and from what Grimmy told him he was a prime candidate for being hired right after receiving his diploma. Then he will be able to make his own living without his parents help.

For now though he preffered a minimal contact and if they were forcing him to spend entire two weeks in their constant presence he is going to make this entertaining for himself. That’s why he wrote an ad.

_FAKE BOYFRIEND NEEDED._

_Long story short, my homophobic parents are coming to town and I really need to piss them off._

_I need someone gay as they come, flamboyant and up for a heavy making out._

_I pay in free food, drinks and vintage Yves Saint Laurent._

_If you’re interested call me._

He printed about hundred of copies and decided to hang them out on his way to class. Whole day he was anxious waiting for his phone to beep with a messege but nothing was happening. Maybe he should have offered some money? Paying someone to pretend to date him with his parents money would be just right amount of vindictive.

The next few days absolutely nothing was happening and Louis begin to loose hope. His parents were set to come next month and he still needed to prepare the guy for what he was about to step into. He got few calls but when he meet with them they were creepy or hideous or just plain boring, so Louis couldn’t see himself making out with them or pretend to be head over heels. Not even for the look on his mother’s face.

‘You know I can do it if you want right?’ Grimmy asked patting his head when they were having their morning coffee few days later. ‘I’m that good of a friend’ he added looking smug

‘You just want to make out with me Grim, we all know that’ Louis laughed.

‘Well maybe you’re right, but I can still help you! I’m flamboyant as they come! They’ll absolutely hate me’ he smirked

‘That’s the point. They will make it about you being too old for me, and they will act like that’s why they don’t approve. I need someone who is perfect in every way, except for being gay, someone that you would love to introduce to your parents if they weren’t dickheads.’ Louis explained.

‘Well good luck buddy, for now you weren’t able to find anyone even halfway decent’ Grimmy said

‘I know.’ Louis groaned again and started to bang his head on the desk ‘I have one coming here during lunch hour, maybe he’ll be the one’

‘During lunch? I hoped you go out with me for lunch. Guy I met like two weeks ago is coming to visit, he’s awesome, you would love him’ Grimmy said with stairy eyes, and Louis eyed him up and down

‘Why the fuck would I be third wheeling on your date? Is he ugly?’

‘It’s not a date asshole, you very well know that I have a boyfriend. And he’s actually hot. If your interview doesn’t work out meet us in the cafe downstairs’ Grimmy said sending him a kiss and moving towards the door.

Whole day in the radio was awful, Louis normally loved his job, he was good at it, and he enjoyed it, but today all he could think about was whether the guy would be right for his little mission. It was easier to focus on this rather than on the sinking feeling in his stomach that even after all this years his parents still refused to accept him. If they wanted it that way, so be it.

Around lunch break he found new determination, and promised himself to really try to connect with that guy. He sat in the corner after ordering cup of tea and started to anxiously bang his fingers on the table.

‘Excuse me? Are you Louis?’ someone asked from behind him, and… no. The guy was at least 40 and he was balding.

‘Well I am Louis, but you sure as hell are not 20.’ he said annoyed packing his things up.

‘I’m not’ the guy said blushing ‘But I think I will be great for this! I can really help you!’ he said standing in Louis’ way.

‘Mate, I was clear on the age issue, you’re not going to be able to help me. Stop wasting my time.’ he said pushing past the guy, he was starting to get really creeped out.

‘But vintage Yves Saint Laurent!’ he heard guy yell behind him, but he was way too pissed to stop.

What the fuck he was supposed to do now? He had less and less time everyday, and he couldn’t pretend to date Niall or Zayn since his parents knew very well they were dating each other, and every other guy he knew looked way too straight for his liking. He pushed open the door to the cafe that Grimmy was supposed to be in, and noticed that he sat with someone who had long brown curls with flowers tangled in them. Huh.

‘Lou!’ Grimmy yelled and waved him over ‘How was your interview?’ he asked smirking

‘Terrible. Guy was forty and bald’ Louis said plopping down on a chair and smiling at the stranger. His front view was even more impressive than his back one. His green eyes were shining, and his gorgeous pink lips were stretched into wide grin, and oh… were those dimples?

‘Hello, dimples’ he said smiling and leaning in towards the guy offering his hand. ‘I’m Louis’

‘Hi gorgeous. I’m Harry’ guy said matching Louis’ coy grin with his own one, and fuck me this voice! This was the voice made for giving command in bed. Who the fuck was this guy? ‘Date go wrong?’ Harry asked coming back to the subject.

‘Not a date.’ Louis said shaking his head ‘my parents are coming to town, and I need a fake boyfriend to piss them off. They’re not really handling this whole gay thing well’ he said showing Harry a flyer, he was still keeping few of those in his pocket, just in case.

‘You know if you get really desperate I really don’t mind’ Grimmy said munching on his salad.

‘You should hope I get desperate since that’s the only way we will ever make out’ Louis smirked winking at him

‘Asshole’ Grimmy tried to hide his smile

‘You love me’

‘What do you mean by paying in vintage Yves Saint Laurent?’ Harry asked with huge hopeful eyes and… interesting.

‘When my grandma died she left me her apartment, and her closet, she and grandpa had tons of designer clothes, but mostly Yves Saint Laurent, it’s not exactly my style so I figured if someone helps me with this I can give them few things, my grandma would love the whole ‘let’s piss of my parents’ concept’ Louis shrugged.

‘Original vintage Yves Saint Laurent?’ Harry asked like he thought he misheard that.

‘Yep.’ Louis nodded and crossed his fingers under the table.

‘I’ll be your fake boyfriend’ Harry said determined.

‘Deal!’ Louis yelled before Harry even finished the sentence.

‘I think they gave me onions, when I specifically told them no onions…’ Grimmy mused picking up a fork of his salad and eyeing it carefully not ackowledging what was happening around him.

‘You wanted to ask me since you came in here, didn’t you?’ Harry asked

‘Nonsence.’ Louis rolled his eyes ‘I wanted to ask you since I saw you from both sides’ he smirked

‘Cheeky. But before I fully commit to this I need to see those clothes. I need to know if they’re worth it.’ Harry said extending his hand with serious tone.

‘Deal’ Louis said calmly shaking his hand. When he touched him the shiver when up and down his spine. And oh boy, he was in trouble.

Next day Louis spend whole morning cleaning up his apartment. Niall and Zayn were laying on the couch watching and movie and they were acting like Louis did not see that Niall’s hand was in Zayn’s pants for good thirty minutes. When he heard muffled groans he finally had enough. He stuck his head to the living room.

‘Jesus would you mind?’ he asked annoyed.

‘Why are you even cleaning?’ Niall asked with his hand still in a place Louis did not want to see it ‘you realise he’s not a real date, right? He’s a fake date?’

‘You realise I don’t appreciate you giving a handjob to my best mate on my couch?’ Louis shot back

‘You don’t but I bet he does’ Niall smirked

‘Babe maybe we should stop’ Louis heard Zayn whispering and Niall shushing him, what he heard next told him that not only did they not stop but they were moving on to blowjobs now. Jesus, why he was friends with them? He put his headphones on and spend next forty minutes cleaning up the kitchen. He could have done that in twenty but he was one hundred procent sure that by now Niall was fucking Zayn on the coffee table and he did not want to see that. Again. When he finally left the kitchen they were laying on the couch in the same exact position, and Louis might have bought it if it weren’t for the fact that they were both sweaty and out of breath.

‘You’re animals. I should evict you’ Louis said shaking his head.

‘I have my rights! We’re paying rent!’ Niall argued deadly offended.

‘Actually you don’t pay rent’ Louis deadpanned. He inhertited an apartment from his grandmom and it was way too big for one person, so he asked his best friend Zayn to move in with him, rent free, after a year Niall came there to pick up Zayn for their first date and after that he never left.

‘I pay you in a pleasure of my company’ Niall said tugging Zayn to his side.

‘If you’re paying someone in pleasure that’s definetly not me’ Louis rolled his eyes and started to dust the bookshelves.

‘Sorry Lou’ Zayn whispered blushing. At least this one had a decency to be ashamed od their filthy sexual behaviour.

‘I know you’re not to blame pumpkin’ Louis cooed at him ‘This marshmallow corrupted you’ Louis said sending evil glare Niall’s way.

‘Sure did’ Niall sounded way too smug.

It wasn’t far from the truth. Zayn looks were certainly deceiving. He looked like trouble, with curtain of raven hair, dark swoon worthy eyes and cheekbones to die for, but the truth was he was huge nerd. He loved video games and comic books, and reading, and he rarely drank, not to mention he associated sex with love one hundred procent. He never had a one night stand, he never even kissed anyone at the party. When he and Louis came to uni they heard about Niall Horan. He was year older than them and he had a reputation of hooking up exlusively with straight guys. People were saying he got a thrill from confusing them, and he was good at it. He drank, ate, smoked and fucked his way all through his freshman year, and he was already basically a legend. So when said Niall Horan suddenly started to come onto his best mate Louis got defensive, Zayn was way too shy to just shot down the guy so Louis was more than happy to do it for him. They both thought Niall will loose interest in a few days. Thankfully nothing like that happened, he was coming over once a day for months, leaving flowers, comic books, tickets to concerts for Zayn to finally agree to go on a date with him. Louis gave him quite a few speeches about cutting off his balls if he hurts Zayn. But Zayn decided to give him a chance, three years later he still didn’t regret it for a second. Louis was ready to kick Niall’s ass if he found out that he was pressuring Zayn to have sex, but Zayn was always blushing and denying it, from his words Niall was perfect gentleman. Louis should have cherished those blessed few months, because once they started to have sex they were doing it all the time. Not giving a fuck whether he was in a room or not.

‘Okay is it a date date?’ Niall asked looking at Louis confused when he emergaed in the living room few hours later freshly clothed and showered.

‘No?’ Louis said acting all innocent.

‘You’re wearing your fuck me jeans’ Niall noted.

So maybe he did put a little extra thought and effort into what he was wearing today. It wasn’t like a thing. His fake soon to be boyfriend was just cute. He could acknowledge that, and move on. In normal circumstances he would have just asked him out, but he couldn’t now! Normally when he started to date someone he left his parents for last. He always tried to put out the conversation as long as he could, not to mention meeting, so whatever chance he got with Dimples it’s going to be gone when he sees his parents. He should still get a few make out sessions out of it before it’s done. Maybe they could became friends after it, as long as the guy won’t turn out to be an idiot or a bore, relationship though, was not in the cards. And Louis knew that! Which is why it was plain ridicoulus that he felt nervous now!

‘Loulou, are you nervous?’ Zayn asked looking soft hidden inside Niall’s arms and smiling lightly.

‘No.’ Louis said defensively. Way too fast for it to be believable.

‘Oh shit, is this guy really that hot?’ Niall asked amused, just when the doorbell rang.

‘I guess you’re about to find out.’ Louis said standing up and wiping his sweaty palms on his jeans. ‘Behave yourselves please’ he added with a pleading look straight into Niall’s eyes.

He opened the door and saw Harry leaning against his doorframe. His hair were up in two buns on each side of his head like Miley Cyrus and that along should have had Louis closing the door in his face, but against all odds Harry was pulling it off, he wore pink dotted shirt that was unbuttoned all the way to his belly button showing off a butterfly tattoo on his stomach, and black tight leather trousers. He was gorgeous.

‘H-hi.’ Louis said and noted displeased that his breath hitched on the sight of Dimples.

‘Hello blue eyes’ Harry smirked and leaned in to kiss Louis’ cheek softly. God his lips were so soft.

They both moved to the living room and he saw Zayn’s jaw landing on the floor and Niall lips curving upwards in the sly smile. Oh, hell no.

‘Hello there, pretty boy’ Niall said ‘He is really that hot’ he nodded towards Louis.

‘You told your friends I was hot?’ Harry asked amused turning to Louis and raising one eyebrow.

‘I…’ Louis started blushing,  and what the hell was happening to him? He needed to get a grip. Now.

‘He didn’t technically. We figured it out.’ Niall said rolling his eyes at Louis and sitting up with Zayn still in his lap ‘I’m Niall by the way. Nice to meet you’

The three of them introduced and made a little bit of a small talk before Louis finally got used to looking at the back of Harry’s neck and resisting the urge to suck on it.  

‘Okay you wanna check out the clothes?’ Louis asked clearing his throat.

‘Sure. Nice to meet you guys’ Harry said standing up.

‘You too pretty!’ Niall waved after him and last thing Louis saw before disappearing with Harry in tow in his bedroom was Zayn pouting clearly jealous and Niall kissing pout off his face. They were the worst.

Louis’ bedroom was the biggest one, he had huge walk-in closet and bathroom on his own, he could see Harry’s eyes widening in shock.

‘Like I said I inherited it. My granpa was a founder of huge law firm, my grandma was an actress’ he said in lieu of explanation.

‘Oh which firm?’ Harry asked curiously ‘I study law.’ he added

‘Tomlinson Calder?’

‘No way! Shit! That’s the best firm in the country! Hell I would die for an internship there!’ Harry said sitting down.

'Well after that you could probably kiss it goodbye, my father would never hire you if he finds out you’re gay.’ Louis said taking out one rack of clothing ‘wait… you are gay right? I’m sorry didn’t mean to assume, and I just now realise that you don’t have to be gay to pretend to be in a relationship with one’

‘I’m pan, actually’ Harry smiled. ‘So you’re studying law? I never seen you on campus’

‘I’m not. I’m media studies major. I work with Grimmy.’

‘No!’ Harry gasped clutching his hand to his chest ‘then who’s going to take over the company?’ he asked with mischievious glint in his eyes.

‘Eleanor Calder probably. She the daughter of a second partner, she studies in Harvard, and my parents also dream of me marrying her, even though we never actually met’ Louis said wheeling out the second rack of clothes.

‘That’s… incredibly medievial of them. Will she pay a dowery?’ Harry asked giggling

‘Probably. In horses. Or like… clients. I am the law roaylty after all’ Louis full on laughed.

‘Well so is she, from what you’re saying’ Harry noted and Louis could see him eyeing clothes with intrest.

‘Go on. Dig in, we can talk while you look. See If there’s anything you like’

Harry’s face was one of pure ecsatsy he was trying on tons of jackets and blouses, and after a while he had a huge pile of clothes next to him, and Louis was sporting the most obvious hard on ever from having Harry bending over and walking around shirtless. How the hell did he manage to have v-lines AND love handles?!

‘Oh. Um… how many can I take?’ he asked blushing slightly looking with torn expression at all of the clothes. He nearly took them all. Louis smiled lightly, he was so pretty trying them on, so excited about every new thing he found.

‘You can take them all’ Louis said trying to hide his fond smile when Harry’s eyes buldged out.

‘I couldn’t…’Harry started but Louis put his hand up stopping him.

‘Of course you could. My grandma loved these clothes, she was always telling me stories about them, she would love to see someone like you wearing them, she would also whack me around the head for letting them rot for so long in my closet.’ Louis smiled and procedeed to pick up the bag to place everything in.

‘Wow. Louis. Thank you. These are so beautiful! I… I’m going to be the best fake boyfriend you’ve ever had’ Harry said giving Louis blinding smile. ‘Oh! I haven’t seen that one! Wow!’ he heard Harry exclaimed and smiled to himself.

‘Oh.’ Louis said when he saw which two pieces of clothing Harry was holding in his arms. ‘I can’t give you those two’ he said softly, and took out jackets from Harry’s hand caressing them softly.

‘whose are they?’ Harry asked sitting beside him.

‘My grandfather’s and his boyfriend’s’ Louis smiled softly, and Harry once again looked at him shocked. ‘My grandma told me this story. She and my grandpa married young. They were around 18 I think? They had couple of children and they were happy, grandma were always saying that they were each other’s best friends. That’s why my grandpa came to her when he started to feel different, and her being in the acting scene, she was familiar with gays at that point, she said that she didn’t mind, that they were married for twenty years by then and that the fire was gone, replaced by something stronger, so they stayed together,affraid what people would say, but they were nothing but friends, she even introduced him to Clifford. He was an actor too. Grandma was always laughing that grandpa had a thing for actors.’ Louis laughed ‘She told me this story when I came out to her. After coming out to my parents I expected the worst. And she told me in return about faboulous time he, her husband and his lover had in Milan that one time’ Louis shook his head laughing ‘these are the jackets they wore to their wedding. It wasn’t an official one, they were just playing pretend, my grandma officiated it, while they were all drunk.’

‘Holy shit.’ Harry breathed stunned ‘this is the most badass love story I have ever heard. And you’re grandma rules!’

‘I know! But she wasn’t innocent, I asked her why she didn’t find anyone else, like grandpa did, but she just looked at me, smoking a cigarette ‘I did found someone. Not just once’ She was a firecracker.’ Louis chuckled.

‘I’m jealous now. I wish my grandpa had a gay lover’ Harry said still in awe about the story.

‘I know! That’s the best thing isn’t it? I think I have pictures of them somewhere in the house, I can show you later If you’d like?’

‘Well I need to know how your genes are handling aging if we’re going to live happily ever after’ Harry teased.

‘Getting into the role I see?’ Louis smiled

‘I already promised you I’m going to be the best fake boyfriend ever’ Harry shrugged. ‘I’m going to ruin you for everyone else’ he whispered leaning in a little.

The worst part was? Louis had an inkling that that part was one hundred procent true.


	2. Froggy boy, grease on knees and a lot of pinning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter number 2! Hope you like it :D 
> 
> If you do or even If you don't come say hi on [Tumblr](http://exquisitetrouble.tumblr.com)  
> xx.

'Why would I even need to know this stuff? We're trying to piss them off not please them!' Harry groaned throwing himself back on Louis' bed, and landing on the materace with his curls perfectly arranged around his head. When he came to Louis' flat today he was wearing a bun. One, this time, but after hours of Louis getting him up to speed with his parent's life, their likes and dislikes, he tugged on the scronchie that was keeping hair up and let his hair go, before  running his long fingers through them repeatdly like he was trying to turn Louis on!  
  
'We want to make them frustrated. We have to make them admitt that the only thing 'wrong' with you' Louis said making air qoutes around the word like it personally offended him 'is your sexual orientation. So you need to be perfect. Every parent's wet dream' Louis decided not to mention how he was very much every gay man's wet dream.  
  
Harry pushed himself up on his elbows and looked at Louis with the combination of innocence and playfulness that was frankly obscene before he went to his knees, and slowly crawled to Louis. He stayed on his knees getting all up into Louis' space, and Louis found himself holding a breath.  
  
'Is me catering to your every sexual need a part of being perfect boyfriend?' he purred into Louis' ear, and his breath hitched, but before he could say something Harry kissed his neck quickly and with a giggle he was back sitting on the bed.  
  
'We should totally do something like that in front of them. Like make them walk in on us!' Harry clasped his hands pretty excited and pleased with himself pretending like he didn't see what he just done to Louis.

‘The last time they’ve been here and walked in on two guys making out they handed them conversion camp pamphlets.’ Louis choked out through his constricted throat. Breathe. Breathe, God dammit.

‘Louis.’ Harry said softly, completely misunderstanding the reason for his disstress ‘I’m sorry.’

‘Well they never actually send me to one of those places? I guess it’s a win?’ Louis said weak like always trying to cover his vulnerability with cynical remarks.

‘It doesn’t make it okay. It doesn’t mean it was right.’ Harry said softly leaning in to Louis, and sending him warm smile.

‘I didn’t said it does. But still… people had worse’ Louis said shrugging. ‘Do you want something to eat?’ he asked because he really didn’t want Harry to tell him now that just because people had worse doesn’t mean he didn’t have a right to be hurt or sad, he knew you can’t compare your pain to someone else’s, he knew all of that, he just didn’t particulary wanted to hear it now.

‘I’m starving.’ Harry moaned, reading correctly that Louis didn’t want to talk about it ‘you’ve been drilling me all day’ he said smirking, making it sound sexual on purpose. Louis felt blush on his cheeks and coughed slightly to cover it up. Which, by the way, made it all that more obvious.

‘You know you’ll have to stop with that kind of sexual innuendos in front of my parents right?’

‘But Louuuu’ Harry whined ‘why?’ he pouted. God damn him. Louis had to physically stop himself for hugging him and saying ‘You can say all the sexual innuendos you like kitten!’ and… ew. Kitten? In that particular sentence it just sounded wrong. And not just in that sentence! It sounded wrong. Period. Because Louis was not fond of Harry and he did not posses any kind of warmy touchy fluffy feelings towards him. Nope. He was not completely endeared with the boy after week of knowing him, because that? That… that would’ve been totally insane, and Louis Tomlinson was not insane. He was not.

‘Because like I said, hundred times, Curly’ Louis said letting this one pet name slide. He could have gone with kitten so ‘curly’ was a win. ‘They need to hate that they love you. That’s what we’re trying to achive here’

‘But I can still say sexual innuendos when we’re alone right?’ Harry asked with hopeful expression and Louis just turned around because he didn’t want to say what he was thinking, which was: of course Harry, If you want to turn me on everytime you open your pretty pink mouth. And… no. When did he became such a filthy animal? Since he met Harry Styles apparently.

Harry stood up and moved after him to the living room and threw himself on the couch. The boy had incredible ability to make himself at home everywhere. Just two days ago they were at the coffee shop and Harry took of his shoes and asked the waitress for blanket, which he got, and then spend two hours laying on Louis’ lap, cocooned in a blanket and forcing Louis to feed him choclate cake, because he insisted he felt a little bit weak, and he could just feel a sickness approaching. Safe to say Louis spend whole two hours barely breathing by having Harry’s head on his lap. It was too much to take, and simultanousely not enough. When the pizza came, Louis asked If Harry wanted to maybe watch a movie, and watched as Harry was making his way through Louis’ DVD.

‘Oh my God I love this!’ he yelled throwing the copy of Titanic on the side. ‘Oh my God! I’m such a Charlotte. Which one are you? I bet you’re Carrie! Or Samantha?’ he asked Louis pushing Sex at the City on top of Titanic. ‘I’ve got chiiiiills!’ he sang all of the sudden an even though Louis was watching him intently he still jumped. ‘They’re multiplying!’ Harry hummed to himself eyeing the copy of Grease ‘And I’m loosing control!’ he sang on with a little shimmy of his shoulders. Oh Lord, oh dear Lord. Louis did not sign up for this! He did not sign up to have this man in his apartment on his knees singing Grease. This was way more than he could handle.

‘Yes! I knew you had to have this if you had the rest!’ Harry exclaimed happily scarping to his feet not at all gracefully. But still so so hot. He put on the movie and Louis could see the opening credits of Love, Actually.

‘This is my favourite!’ Harry yelled again and sat by Louis wiggiling his little bum to make himself comfortable and taking huge bite of the pizza. How. How did that even fit in his mouth?! ‘What?’ he asked catching Louis staring ‘oh. You wanted to pick a movie?’ he asked blushing lightly.

‘No! No. I love this one. I don’t buy this whole ‘watching Christmas movies only when it’s Christmas’ thing’ Louis said praying that this topic will sway Harry’s attention, and boy he was right. Harry made huge eyes and started to nod vigorously while saying ‘Totally Lou! That’s what I was thinking!’ Jesus. Louis was so fucking screwed.

So they watched, and ten minutes in Louis was ready to bounce out of his skin. He could feel Harry beside him and his mind was going in circles trying to come up with a reasonable excuse to put his arm around Curly’s shoulders. He was one second away from using the whole pitiful ‘I’m just stretching/yawning’ move and he felt sorry for himself. It couldn’t get any worse than this.

‘Lou can we close the blinds? I hate watching movies when it’s not dark’ scratch that. It definetly could get worse than this.

But since Louis was a sucker, and he was whipped he did not protest, he obiediently stood up and closed the blinds, and then he turn off the light, and sat back in his place. This time though he used this sudden movement to his adventage and he sat down closer to Harry than before, but because he was a puss he didn’t have a balls to sit close enough to touch him, so he was there just inches away and Louis was still not touching him. Harry’s hand was laying next to his leg on the couch and Louis moved his hand as closely to Harry’s as he could without brushing skin. In the dark everything was hightened and more intense and he could swear he was on sensory overload. He was going fucking crazy with all of it, and then Harry moved slightly, and his hand bumped into Louis’, who held his breath and turned quickly to the TV pretending he didn’t notice. He counted to twenty and looked over at Harry again, he was looking at TV still. He was sitting relaxed like nothing happened, like they didn’t touch just seconds ago!

Louis was outraged. Why didn’t Harry blush? Or stutter an apology? Why did he act like he didn’t notice that they touched at all?! He huffed queitly and crossed his arms over his chest thinking that fine! If to Harry touching Louis was just so insignificant and not even worth metioning then he won’t be metioning it then.

‘Oh my God I love this part!’ Harry squeled, and Louis didn’t even had it in him to see what part he was talking about because Harry was clutching onto his bicep and looking at the screen intensely.

‘He’s in love with her so much!’ Harry sighed and let Louis go, and Louis’ muscles acted without his permission when he wrapped his arm around Harry’s shoulders awkwardly. And that seemed to caught Harry’s attention. Fucking finally! Louis was way too hot to be loosing an attention contest to a movie!

‘Are you trying to put a moves on me?’ Harry asked raising an eyebrow, and Louis swallowed loudly. What does he do? Just say it? But what? ‘Kinda’? That was the only aswer he had right now. He needed to say something now. Holy shit. What to say?

‘Jesus Lou, don’t look so freaked out!’ Harry giggled ‘I was joking! I know you’re not putting moves on me for real’ he giggled again, and every one of his giggles as cute as they were were like a knife into Louis’ stomach. ‘But we should definetly cuddle! I love cuddles!’ he exclaimed wiggiling his way into Louis’ embrace and placing Louis hand on his stomach, while he leaned his elbow on Louis’ tigh. Shit. ‘Plus we should really get comfortable with each other. Your parents are going to notice If we’re afraid to hug!’ Harry explained further and for the first time Louis really needed him to stop talking now.

‘Yeah’ Louis said and even to him, his voice sounded extremely weak, he cleared his throat and started again ‘yeah. That’s what I was thinking’

‘You little mastermind, you’ Harry winked at him, smiled goofily and sank more into Louis’ arms. After that every second stretched painfully in Louis’ mind. He wanted to move his hand over Harry’ stomach but he knew full well that he won’t be able to stop once he’ll start, so he just stood still, and watched how his hand was moving up and down a little with every breath Harry took.

‘Lou would you relax? You can feel me up if you want to, I’m not going to be mad’ Harry smiled taking Louis hand in his and starting to play with his fingers.

The most heartbreaking thing was Louis could see doing exactly this years from now. And it was scary to fall for someone so fast, especially since Harry seemed totally unefected by the whole situation. He didn’t hold a breath every two seconds, and he didn’t go over his every move hundred times in his head before making it. It must have been great way to live not to be hyper aware of everything the other person does all the time. Louis was exhausted after a week, he could only hope that his infatuation will turn out to be just a silly crush and that it will go away.

They spend entire movie like that and even when it was finished Harry refused to move. Louis could swore he would have a brain damage from permanent lack of oxygen.

‘How’s your sister in all of this?’ Harry asked all of the sudden queitly

‘She’s great. She’s small but scrappy’ Louis smiled lightly and Harry chuckled ‘She always had my back. Even though she was 13 when I told her. She just shrugged and said ‘I know’ and that was it. She also went to PFLAG then and there, all those moms there loved her immadietly, she was like their mascote’

‘She sounds incredible.’ Harry said softly

‘Do you have any siblings?’ Louis asked ignoring the small flutter in his stomach when Harry closed his eyes and nuzzled into Louis’ chest.

‘I have older sister. Gemma. She’s great. I think you would get along with her. She has a sharp tongue, she was always making my bullies cry when I was little.’

‘Someone bullied you?’ Louis asked shocked. I mean the boy must have been the prettiest on the playground even when he was eleven. He was sure that 11 year old Louis would be all over 11 year old Harry.

‘I had curls and dimples. They were saying that I’m a girl and calling me Harriet’ Harry laughed, but something about his laugh was a little off.

‘Well if you would have been a girl, I bet you would be the prettiest out there’ he whispered into Harry’s hair and could see a smile blush spreading onto younger boys curls ‘And I also bet you were the prettiest boy there, that’s why they were calling you a girl, they had their first queer epiphany and the only way they could deal with that is pretend you’re a girl. That’s like text book straight male of them.’ Louis added with more confident tone smiling lightly.

'So you think they were all just in love with me?’ Harry asked, obviously fishing for compliments, and Louis was so whipped that he was going to give them to him. He would give him whatever he wanted.

‘Obviously. I mean, I didn’t see you when you were in middle school. But I bet dimples were still there, curls probably too, and those blowjob lips, I mean come on!’ Louis giggled

‘Did you just say ‘blowjob lips’?’ Harry asked stopping his movement for a second and his eyes widening comically.

‘Come on it couldn’t be the first time you heard this one’ Louis laughed tickling his sides.

‘This is objectifying me!’ Harry laughed standing up and wiggiling away from Louis fingers

‘You love it though! Come on you know what kind of mouth you have on you, froggy boy. That’s why you have like thousands of lipsticks!’ Louis said tugging on Harry’s curls.

Harry choked on his breath and pretended to be deadly offended.

‘Froggy boy? Oh you crossed a line now mister!’ he said and launched himself onto Louis knocking them both to the ground. They started to wrestle and Louis had to willed himself not to think about how they are basically dry humping in the middle of his living room. They were laughing when the loud sound of opening the door stopped them.

‘You don’t have to fucking flirt your way through everything Jesus Ni! You always fucking do this and then act all innocent!’ Zayn yelled stomping through the door and getting rid of his shoes in rather violent way

‘For crying out loud Zayn! I flirt at work, I spend there almost 12 hours a day! I’m fucking exhausted all the time! That doesn’t mean anything, I just try to get through the day!’ Niall said coming behind him

‘Oh and you just so happens to flirt with the hottest guy in your office!’

‘I don’t care if he’s the hottest or not Z. I’m with you, few lines here and there won’t change that.’ Niall said softly

‘I’m not sure if it won’t.’ Zayn said with mouth in a tight line.

‘What is that supposed to mean?’ Niall asked taken aback.

‘I don’t know’ Zayn said looking down on his feet. Niall just took a deep breath and stepped to Zayn taking a hold of his waist lightly.

‘Z. Babe, Zayn. Look at me’ he said lifting Zayn’s chin ‘I’m going to go, stay in my apartment. When you want to talk or yell at me again call me and I’ll come home. Just remember that I love you okay? And I would never jeopredize that. Not for anyone or anything. When you’ll be ready for me to come home, I’ll come home’ Niall said and left the apartment with one soft kiss to Zayn’s forehead.

Zayn turned around and just then he saw Louis and Harry that froze on the floor with Louis stradling Harry’s lap and holding his hands tightly.

‘Oh. Hi guys’ he said eyeing their position with narrowed eyes. ‘Um… carry on? Nice to see you Harry’ he said and moved with slouched shoulders to his bedroom.

‘Shit’ Louis said letting go of Harry’s hands.

‘You should see if he’s okay. I’m going to go home’ Harry said

‘Yeah, sorry about that’ Louis nodded standing up. ‘I’ll call you yeah?’

‘Sure Lou’ Harry smiled and moved to Louis’ bedroom to take his stuff. He kissed Louis cheek by the door and just like that he was gone. Louis ran a hand over his face and went to the kitchen taking out caramel ice-cream putting generous amount in two bowls and spiking it with few splashes of whiskey. He knocked on his best friends door.

‘Come in Lou’ he heard Zayn saying. He went in and sat on the bed next to his best friend and wordlessly handed him the bowl.

‘What happened?’ Louis asked queitly.

‘I came to pick him up from work. And when I came in he was talking to Luke, you know which one, you met him on his office Christmas party. They were like.. I mean it doesn’t even matter what they were saying. It was just loaded with sexual innuendos. But like I didn’t think much of it cause Niall is Niall, I mean he flirts more than he breathes. But then he went to take his stuff and I stayed with Luke waiting for him and … Luke told me I should be careful. Because it would be ‘indeed ridicoulus If a college student could hold on to guy like Niall’’ Zayn finished with the tips of his mouth carved downwards.

‘You know that’s just bullshit right?’ Louis asked, completely outraged.

‘Is it though? I am just a college student, living with a roommate, sometimes I’m selling my paintings If I’m lucky and other than that I work in a coffee place! Niall is a senior graphic designer after a year of working in that firm! He’s brilliant! And sucsessful, and he’s the greatest person I’ve ever met. Is it this crazy to think that on my best day I still have no idea what the fuck I did to get to have him?’

And here it was. Louis hated how self conciouss Zayn could get. Especially since he had nothing to be self conciouss about. He was amazing person, he was smart and funny and incredibly supportive and he was probably the most beautiful person on the planet look wise. Louis knew that was true, and he knew Niall saw it like that too. The only person who didn’t was Zayn.

‘Zaynie’ Louis started pulling the other boy to his side ‘you’re such a dork. You are intelligent, witty, supportive, reasonable and just right amount of crazy, you have cheekbones carved by gods and perfect cock’ Zayn snorted a little watery ‘and you know how I know that? Because one person, namely Niall Horan can’t shut up about you for years now. These are all his words, and believe me I could live without having to hear Niall saying how much he loves your cock. I didn’t need to know how it tastes like’ Louis smiled making a face. That was one of the weirdest conversations he had with Niall to the date, and that is saying something. ‘Niall is flirting with everyone, hell he even cheap flirts with me. This boys is flirting everytime he opens his mouth, that’s just the way he is, he can make everything sound filthy. I saw him shooting the cheapest most cliche pick up lines more times than I can count but you know who is the one person he never used them on? You. Even when he was still trying to make you go out with him, he never used cheap pick up lines. You said it yourself you didn’t mind it until that Luke, who is by the way about to suffer a major injury told all that stuff. And you shouldn’t listen to him, he’s obviously in love with Niall of course he’s going to talk shit. But the point is Niall is in love with you. And whatever Luke thinks or doesn’t think doesn’t mean shit’

Zayn sat silent for a while, and Louis could swore he could practicullary hear little gears turning in his head. He knew all of that, just sometimes he needed someone to remind him.

‘I think I’ll call him. To come home’ Zayn finally said ‘thank you Lou’

‘Not a problem biscuit’ Louis smiled kissing his cheek.

When Niall came Louis went to sit on the balcony to give them some privacy. The apartment was huge but he didn't want them to think he was eavsedrooping by the wall. He appluded himself for moving to balcony when even from this distance he could hear make up sex moans. Jesus Zayn sounded like a porn star. He smoked a cigarette and read few things for his class the next day, and then he debated for half an hour whether he should text Harry or will it come off as desperate, until finally reasoning with himself that they’re not dating. And there was no texting code when it comes to friends.

To Harry: _Niall and Zayn are ‘making up’ as we speak. I’m hiding on the balcony. Why did I let them live with me???_

He put the phone down and stared at it intently waiting for a reply. Thankfully he didn’t have to wait long.

To Louis: _Probably because you’re a sweetheart that pretends to be all tough ;) you’re like a little fluffy kitten thinking he’s a tiger ;)_

Louis laughed out loud and bit his lip trying to contain his grin.

To Harry: _is this a payback for a froggy boy? Or blowjob lips? Because If you want me to take it back- I won’t. I stand by what I said :D_

To Louis: _headstrong… I like that in a man ;) hey I wanted to ask you? Niall has an apartment? I thought he lived with you and Zayn? Feel free to tell me that’s none of my bussiness, just got curious :D_

To Harry: _ha, no, it’s not a secret or anything. He lives with us but he still rents one bedroom, it’s cheap as fuck, I’m pretty sure he haven’t been there in months. They use it sometimes for fuck fests and anniversairies when I kick them out :D_

He spend almost an hour talking to Harry and his face was hurting from smiling. He was so fucking screwed. This whole thing sounded like such a good idea at the beginning, and even using Harry for this seemed fine, he wasn’t nearly as flamboyant as Louis imagined, but he knew his parents would love him, and then hate him for being Louis’ boyfriend, and now… he was happy he met Harry, whatever was going to happen, or whatever is not going to happen more likely he was happy that they met, but being around all of that on a daily basis and not being with him is going to be exhausting. Thankfully Niall entering the balcony interupted his train of thoughts. It was getting depressing.

‘Hi Ni’ Louis smiled softly. ‘You need something?’

‘Um no. Zayn is sleeping.’ Niall said sitting on the chair next to Louis and lighting up a cigarette.

‘It’s like 8 pm. Fucked him that good?’ Louis giggled, and Niall’s face turned smug for a second before furrowing his eyebrows again. ‘Hey Nialler, what is it?’ Louis asked getting worried.

‘I didn’t know! I didn’t know he said something like that to him! I swear to God Lou I had no idea! I’m going to fucking kill him tommorow! I wouldn’t be even talking to the asshole If I known! I’m sorry!’ Niall yelled on one breath looking with huge pleading eyes to Louis.

‘What the fuck Ni?’ Louis asked confused ‘I know you didn’t know! Why are you sorry? You didn't do anything wrong!’

‘I hurt him’ Niall said sounding small. ‘You should chop off my balls like you promised me all those years ago’

'You didn’t hurt him. Luke did. And that’s not your fault at all. And Ni, I know I am typical pit bull of a best friends but, all those things I said? They don’t imply to you anymore. I’m not the one protecting him now. You are. I don’t have to protect him from you, I never had to’

‘I’m going to kill that son of a bitch’ Niall said, and in this moment Louis was really affraid of him.

‘Maybe try talking to him? You don’t want to get fired right?’ Louis asked trying to do some damage control.

‘Fine. But if he says another word about Zayn I’m beating him up.’ Niall warned

‘If he says another word about Zayn you have my blessing to do so. Hell! Harry is almost a lawyer he can get you out of jail If things go south’ the moment the words left his mouth he knew it was a mistake. Niall’s eyes lit up and he looked at Louis smirking.

‘Speaking of whom. Heard you and Harry were dry humping like virgin prom queen and captain of the football team on prom night in the back of the car’ Niall wiggled his eyebrows

‘That’s… oddly specific of you’ Louis deadpanned trying to change the subject but Niall wiggled his finger at him

‘Don’t even try that with me Lewis. What’s the deal with you two?’

‘There’s no deal. I called him froggy boy and I may have say he had a blowjob lips.’ Louis mumured, and Niall’s laugh rippled through the calm night.

‘Oh my God you did not. You’re always such a spaz when you try to flirt with people.’ Niall giggled.

‘Fuck you! I’m not a spaz!’

‘So you’re not denying the flirting part?’ Niall asked immadietly, and… that motherfucker. Louis was looking for a way to deny it but before he could do so, the words started to pour out of him.

‘He fucking sings Grease Niall! He sings Grease on his knees! And he has absolutely no idea what personal space is, and he’s always making these sexual innuendos that are making me hard even If they’re stupid as fuck! And he wears flowers in his hair and he walks like a baby deer, and I swear to God he tripped walking the straight line at least 10 times since I met him and we known each other for a week! He’s fucking ridicoulus, that’s what he is and I am completely endeared with him. I can’t stop thinking about his froggy face or his blowjob lips.’ Louis said hiding his head in his hands.

‘Oh boy’ Niall said pushing himself into Louis’ lap. ‘When I met Zayn I was freaked out, because I was getting hard everytime he blushed. Somehow my mind was making a connection to things I shouldn't be thinking about. And then literally my only goal in life was making him blush or smile. I was reduced to literally those two things. And I spent months trying to get him, you know that better than anyone. But I did. And you know how worth it it was.’

‘He doesn’t want me like that Ni. We’re watching a movie and I can barely breathe and he’s like completely cool.’

‘Then make him want you! Did I give up on Zayn after a first no? Or the hundred one? I didn’t. I’m not saying you have to tell him right away, just think about it. Just because he isn’t a spaz around you doesn’t mean he doesn’t like you back. I was never a spaz around Zayn’

‘Really?’ Louis said smirking ‘you were never a spaz around Zayn? Do I have to remind you how you met?’ Louis said smiling mischieviously

‘Don’t you dare!’ Niall yelled.

‘We were just going to a bar for a drink like we did every friday night..’ Louis started but Niall put his hands on his mouth.

‘Shut up. Don’t ruin my street cred’ Niall giggled, and Louis licked his palm.

‘Fine! You should go to sleep. You have important conversation tommorow with Luke’ Louis reminded Niall, who made a face.

‘I’m going to seriously hurt him’ Niall said with stern face

‘Remember! Only If he’s still an asshole! You can’t blame a guy for falling in love with you, come on’ Louis laughed.

‘I know mom! I’ll talk to him first.’

And if Niall came home the next day with bruised knuckles, and lied to Zayn that he grazed them on the wall by accident noone needed to know.


	3. Inspirational quotes, life lessons and David Beckhams' long lost brother.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enters Liam, and boners and Louis is freaking out more than usual :D
> 
> Hope you like it! Let me know what you think in the comment section below! :D

‘You look like shit. Late night?’ Grimmy asked wiggiling his eyebrows suggestively when he saw Louis in the morning.

‘Yes.’ Louis groaned and tighten his hold on a tea cup, when he saw Grimmy’s face he quickly shook his head ‘But I wasn’t doing whatever it is you think I was doing’ he said.

‘No?’ Nick asked like he didn’t believe Louis for a second.

‘No. I was out with Harry’ he looked like shit. He knew he looked like shit, but hanging out with Harry was exhausting stuff okay? It wasn’t even the fact that the guy was crazy, the night was actually fun, most fun Louis had in months, it was the fact that Louis needed to work really hard not let his green eyed monster show whenever someone was chatting Harry up. Thankfully like a good friend he was Harry insisted that they both score or noone scores, so the only thing Louis needed to do was not take anyone home, and come up with thousands of ridicoulus excuses as to why he’s doing so. It was fine.

‘Well in that case I definetly hope you were doing what I think you were doing. Harry’s hot’ Grimmy said with dreamy expression.

‘Don’t you have a fucking boyfriend?’ Louis groaned. He didn’t need this this early in the morning. He knew Harry was hot okay? It was the only thing he thought about for two weeks and he didn’t need people reminding him. He was doing a bang up job of not forgetting it himself.

‘I do. Colton also agrees that Harry is hot’ Nick smirked

‘Everyone agrees that Harry is hot!’ Louis snapped annoyed. ‘Can we move on now please?’

‘What crawled up your ass this fine morning?’ Nick asked looking at him like at the six year old acting out.

Louis let out an incoherent string of sounds and started to bang his head on the table.

‘O shit! You’re into him!’ Nick exclaimed

‘Shut up.’

‘Oh my God this is so perfect! When I’ll give a toast at your wedding I’m going to tell a story about how I brought you two together’ he smiled ignoring Louis’ protests.

‘You’re such an asshole’ Louis sighed defeted

‘Why? Promise I won’t speak about how you had a crush on me before you met the groom’ Grimmy teased

‘Fuck off. It lasted like a week!’ Louis yelled with narrow eyes ‘you’re never going to forget that, won’t you?’

‘Nope.’ Nick smiled smuggly. That son of a bitch. Louis swore he will never drink around him again. It wasn’t his fault that at the first radio party since he started to work there he got maginficently pissed and may have told Grimmy that he’s in love with him, and then tried to convince him to take him home. Whatever, it was already forgotten. Never happened.

‘So you two are dating for real now?’ Nick asked then

‘No.’ God, maybe If Louis would play along with that interogation Grimmy will give it up.

‘Why not?’

‘Because he doesn’t like me like that. Jesus do I need to spell everything out for you?’

‘Okay drama queen, but how do you know he doesn’t like you like that?’

‘Because you know! You always know whether someone likes you or not.’ Louis said patiently like he was explaining it to a kid.

‘Bullshit! I was bumping into Colton at industry parties for years, I interviewed him like four times and I was always yelling at myself for having a crush on a straight guy, before he came out, and then we met again and he said he had a crush on me forever. I never fucking knew!’

‘But Harry is out, that’s hardly the same thing’

‘When it comes to this it is. You can never know until you ask and he tells you. So don’t be a coward, just ask’ Grimmy shrugged

‘I can’t now’

‘And why not if I may ask princess?’

‘Since when do you ask permission to ask questions?’ Louis muttered under his breath, but when Grimmy leveled him with unimpressed gaze he sighed and continued ‘after he meets my parents. I’m going to ask him after he meets my parents becuase maybe he will even want to try now, but every guy runs like hell when he meets my parents. I can’t afford him doing so.’

If Louis was hoping that his feelings for Harry would go away after awhile he was horribly mistaken. Not only did they not go away, after another week he was deeper into this than ever and he was starting to obsess. So he finally had to set some kind of a date because he knew already that just being friends with him won’t be enough, but asking him now without giving him all information sounded unfair, and Louis was sure that he rather not have him at all than have him for a second and then loose him when his parents come waltzing in the city, destroying lifes and paying people off.

‘Fine! But I’m going to have so much fun with it until you do!’ Grimmy giggled and left, and Louis was left alone with the stack of papers he needed to go through, that he was dreading for a week now and his thoughts of Harry.  On second thought? He will try his luck with papers.

That afternoon he was set to come to Harry’s apartment, for what Harry called ‘making out practise’. Louis really tried to convince him that it was ridicoulus and they don’t need to practise, but Harry just huffed and claimed deadly offended that in every movie when they don’t practise making out, first kiss in front of people was just awkward and everyone could tell. He also winked at Louis and said he hoped to get at least a grope of that ass, and that was way too much for Louis to handle. He woke up the next day after rather vivid dream of nothing else than Harry playing with his bum all night. Yes, Louis was done, the only thing left of him were his perverted dreams and raging hard on.

Louis couldn’t just tell him that he decided that making out with Harry is simply not a good idea because Louis is not sure if he’ll ever be able to get over him if they do this. He couldn’t tell him any of that, which meant that whenever Louis was saying that he’s not sure kissing is nessesery Harry was getting defensive and saying that his ad promised heavy making out and ‘come on Lou I can’t be that hideous?’ with a little smile on his face that said that he knew damn well how completely unhideous he was. Cocky fucker.

So there he was now. Standing outside Harry’s apartment and eyeing a letter 2B comparing it to the one on the screen of his phone. Okay, this is it. Here it goes. Come on, Tommo, you got this. You got this!

He knocked.

Waiting for door to be answered was much more nerve wracking that waiting for them to be knocked on, Louis reckoned. There was some life lesson in this one, perhaps it’ll come to him later.

The door swang open and Louis saw a guy that was definetly not Harry. He was taller and bulkier, had impressive bicep and puppy dog eyes. ‘Pre-Harry’ Louis might have taken this guy home, ‘post-Harry’ Louis felt annoyed that hot guy is opening the door to Harry’s apartment. Oh dear what if they’re fucking?

‘Um. Hi? I’m Louis? I’m here to see Harry’ he said a little unsure.

‘Of course Louis! Come on in!’ the guy said letting Louis in ‘Harry is running late and his phone died. Mine is the only number he remembers so he called me from work to tell me to apologize for him and take care of you until he gets here. You want a beer?’ the guy asked, and perfect. Harry knew this guy’s number art. Oh God they were fucking, weren’t they?

‘Um, If you have other things to do I can just go and…’ Louis started

‘Nonscence!’ the guy yelled smiling widely ‘I don’t have anything important and Harry should be here any minute’ he took out two beers from the fridge and passed one of them to Louis ‘I’m Liam by the way’ he said extending his hand. Louis shook it and the awkward silence stretched out over them.

‘So how did you met Harry?’ Louis asked after cracking his head up to come up with literally anything to say.

‘We’re studying together. I was looking for a roommate and I had to get one stat,since I had to pay the down payment for the apartment and my then girlfriend I was suppose to live with fucked off to States, so I was kinda heartbroken and screwed and I met Harry in a bar. I tried to pick him up.’ Liam giggled. Well that’s just amazing. ‘and we talked for like hours, figured out we were both studying law, and then I just randomly started to cry and spill my guts about break up and everything’ Liam laughed and Louis let out nervous giggle.

So the bulky long lost brother of David Beckham was into Harry. How exactly Louis was supposed to compete with this? He may be able to get like one punch in, when it will come to inevitable duel for Harry’s hand, but like this guy could probably pick him up with one hand and then throw him away. This would be a fight of a century! Hedgehog against pitbull. Move over David and Golliat there was new underdog and giant in town! Jesus Louis was driving himself up the wall.

'That’s cute story’ Louis choked out because what exactly he was supposed to say? He knew he sounded awkward and off and generally wrong, but what else was there? 'yes I’m so glad you met him in the bar and got to know him and decided that multiple nights were better than one night stand and now you’re living with a guy. I see were you coming from’ ?!

'that’s Harry for you, you meet a guy and after two minutes he’s like your best friend’ Liam said smiling. Did Louis looked so loved up when he was talking about Harry? Oh God he hoped not.

'well I know the feeling rather well’ Louis chuckled. Whatever agenda Liam had, he wasn’t wrong about Harry, who had a way of wiggiling into your life and then pretend he was there all along.

'I bet you do, Harry’s hardly home these days. But from what he’s saying he’s having fun’

'well that’s the least I can do, make sure he’s having fun. After all he is doing me a huge favour’ Louis shrugged like making Harry happy wasn’t more important than breathing. Not at all. Good job Louis. He totally bought it.

'yeah, um… he never gave me any details but he did say that your parents aren’t exactly supportive, that’s why he’s doing this, and I just wanted to say that I get it. Mine had hard time coming to terms with my sexuality themselves. It took them like three years to even say the word 'bisexual’ out loud’ Liam said, and damn him to hell, Louis did not need for this guy to be all polite all of the sudden. He wanted to hate his guts not like him!

'thank you. Well mine didn’t say a word 'gay’ without whispering it like it’s a secret for 9 years and counting.’ Louis smiled manically 'so I lost hope of things changing anytime soon. Mostly got over it' he shrugged then.

'you can never get over it. Just… If you need someone to talk, I know we just met, but I get how it’s like, and I know not all people do. Harry for example comes from most supportive family I’ve ever seen, and no matter how sweet and understanding he is he can never really know what it’s like. And Harry has been talking about you constantly so I feel like I already know you’ Louis looked at him trying to keep his face straight but he’s mind was a constant loop of 'fuck you’. It was nice, that was the problem. It was nice, and selfless and sweet, and who fucking let him look like this AND be a decency human being? Like what the actual fuck?

'I’ll keep that in mind’ Louis smiled and thankfully just then the door flied to the wall and Harry appeared his curls wild around his head with something shining in them. When he came closer Louis realised it was a little daisy shaped pins. He was way too cute to be real.

'Lou! I’m so sorry. I was just about to leave when my boss gave me another stack of papers to go through that I needed to get done as soon as possible’ Harry said shrugging his coat and Louis did not choke on thin air when he saw Harry in a suit. God he hoped Liam didn’t see that.

'It's okay, I took care of him’ Liam smiled wickedly

'Oh thank you Li’ Harry cooed and kissed Liam’s cheek softly. And not like the middle of his cheek, where his perfect few days scruff was! No! He kissed like a little lower. Like where your neck starts. That’s definetly means they’re fucking right? You don’t just kiss people you don’t fuck on their necks right?

'yeah, I even got a beer’ Louis said weekly showing off he’s beer and praying to God he didn’t sound as stupid as he thought.

'no!’ Harry gasped 'Now I have to take care of you real good cause I’m affraid you’ll start like Liam better’ he grinned with his eyes shining. _ Marry me, please. _

'I could never’ Louis smiled, ignoring the sexual innuendo and how smitten he sounded.

'I certainly hope so, mister’ Harry giggled and hooked his finger onto Louis belt.  _ Marry me, damn it! _ 'Come on Lou. We have tons of things to do!’ he exclaimed and pulled Louis out of the kitchen.

Harry’s room was very Harry. It was colorful and full of photos and some stupid inspirational quotes. On one shelf he had dozen of cat figurines. He had band posters on the wall next to a book shelf full of heavy law books. He had romantic white mirror that had pink boa drapped all over it. Harry's room was just like Harry- full of contradictions that somehow made perfect sense. And Louis really needed to check his head, to make sure it was still in place cause now he was talking out of his ass.

'Cool room’ COOL ROOM? what was he? Twelve year old coming over to his crush’s house to do homework? What. The. Fuck.

'Thanks Lou’ Harry chirpped happily taking out some things from his dresser. 'I need to take a shower because I stink, and you do not want to make out with this’ he said motioning to himself. Louis bite 'I do, though’ down. 'Feel free to snoop around’ Harry winked and disapeared out the door.

Louis sat down on a bed with obviously pink duvet and bounced up a little bit. The bed was comfy. God, he couldn’t believe he was actually going to do this. It was so stupid. When he wrote the ad he thought about the pretty guy that will play his fake boyfriend, who will be very kissable and will preferebly blush along the way and Louis just really liked kissing pretty boys okay? But he did not imagine having actual feelings for a guy! He looked around praying for a sky to come falling down on his head but no such thing happened. One thing did catch his eye though. 'Each day do one thing you’re scared of’. One thing Louis learned during his not so long time on this planet? Inspirational quotes were shit. But this one time maybe he will listen to them.

Harry thankfully came back in the record speed, and Louis had no more time to questions his life desicion that led him to this place. Harry was wearing tight yoga pants and loose grey tank top that gave way too easy access from every side for Louis to grope at Harry’s abs. Probably also drool on them. He was towelling his hair and he smelled incredible. He took out all the daisies from his hair, but Louis could tell he was doing that in a hurry since he still had one tangled on the back of his head.

'hi! Again I’m so sorry for keeping you waiting!’ he said frowning lightly and drapping his towel on a chair and moving to Louis and without so much as a warning stradling his lap.

'no need to be jumpy’ he whispered next to Louis’ ear and Louis did not jump. He did not.

'm not jumpy' Louis mumured just because apparently it was a must to act like a stubborn 5 year old in front of a guy you like.

'You are. And it’s okay. I mean if this is really that much of a deal for you we don’t have to kiss. We can just cuddle a little to get familiar with each other.’ of course he would be sweet like that. 'seriously Lou, I mean I’m fine with kissing, I love kissing, kissing is like so fun, but I get that some people don’t want to kiss like any person that they met so…’ he was starting to fixate and Louis didn’t need the guy of his dreams to think that Louis did not like kissing. God forbid he will start to act more careful around him and stop touching him literally all the time. So he did the only think he could think off and grabbed Harry by his neck and connected their lips.

Do you know like, in the movies and books everyone is always talking about epic first kiss. The sparks ale flying, there are fireworks around your head and you can literally feel the kiss in your bones. It makes your whole body tingling and you can’t get enough. So you know how it is to hear about that kiss and then look at your life, however long you’re living it and think that you did have some incredible kisses, you had a lot or few or one that was just amazing, you think about all the great kisses that were great but they were certainly not this. So you start to think it’s bullshit, you think that the guy in the rom com is saying 'wow’ after a kiss as in 'wow I’m finally going to get laid’ and that the girl says wow back cause she kinda feels bad for the guy for using too much tongue, or using it in the wrong place. that’s the reality, movies are fake and it’s something that never actually happens. Until you meet that one person that changes everything. That makes you go: 'shit it’s actually a thing’ and suddenly your whole life and priorites are shifting, and it’s no longer sappy or gross. It’s literally the only thing that makes sense- to have your lips on theirs.

This was that kind of kiss.

And If Louis could get something so incredibly sappy out of his mouth he would say that the kiss made him see the stars. Or believe in God. Whatever.

'not against kissing. Got it.’ Harry said a little breathless when they finally came up for air. 'Nice technique by the way’ he winked at Louis and he may have just as well punch him in the stomach because this wasn’t whatever he was expected after a kiss like that. It was what was expected after making out for fun, when you don’t particulary care who you’re making out with. So the logical course of action would be to stop, because Louis was already too deep and going forward would mean reaching the point of no return. But that’s not what Louis did. He just thought fuck it, and dived in to taste those pretty lips again. Mistake never tasted so sweet.

'Less talking, more kissing’ he mumured nuzzling Harry’s jaw and he could swear he saw Curly shiver.

'For a person who didn’t even want to do this you’re really going at it' Harry breathed aiming for playful and landing somewhere along extremely turned on. So maybe Louis was doing absolutely nothing to Harry’s heart or wherever feelings were coming from, but he was hot and young and desireble and he will be damned If he won’t do things to Harry’s dick.

'Just wanted to be rescpectful is all’ Louis whispered smirking, and kissing Harry’s long neck. Shit he wanted to suck on it since he first saw him. 'But since you were practicullary gagging for it, I thought why not?’ he ended blowing a hickey onto Harry’s collarbone.

'I’m extremely tempted to make a gagging joke’

'If you do I’ll be extremely tempted to gag you’ Louis said looking up to him with serious expression.

'Promises, promises’ Harry sing songed while kissing Louis right below his ear.

Well if Louis is going to die tommorow he might as well have fun today. He shrugged internally and quickly flipped them over making Harry land on the materace with Louis between his legs.

'Tell me when you feel like we’re comfortable around each other enough’ he said with mocking tone and lowered himself to capture Harry’s lips again, stopping him from giving snappy answer.

So they kissed, and Louis’s hands were in places he was not ready to discuss, and Harry’s hand were rarely leaving his bum, and their lips were hardly ever not touching, maybe just for a second somewhere to make a joke or ironic remark, and Louis could feel how hard Harry was beneath him and how he couldn’t stop a little grind of his hips. He didn’t even have to wait long for Louis to join the program, and now they were full on dry humping and it felt so good Louis could die right there.

'Fuck Lou.’ Harry moaned bucking his hips up one last time before opening his eyes in shock and stilling 'Um I think we should probably stop. I mean I’m all for making out but getting orgasms out of it may be pushing it' he laughed breathless.

'who told you I was about to come?’ Louis asked but got off the other boy and lay on the bed next to him.

'Your dick’ Harry shot back giggling

'I reserve a prevlige of talking to my dick to people that are actually sucking it, so I don't think he did’ Louis answered not missing a bit, and Harry burst out with laughter.

'Don’t think we have to worry about not being comfortable around each other' Harry said through laughter.

'Like you were ever uncomfortable around anyone!’ Louis giggled.

'what is that supposed to mean?’ Harry asked in mock offence.

'baby, the third day we known each other you met me for lunch and didn’t order anything and then proceeded to eat half of mine, stealing my fork every second. The day after that you demanded a foot rub and you stopped speaking to me until I complied. You have literally no boundries’ Louis looked at him smiling widely. He loved Harry’s no boundry policy.

'what can I say, I’m a people’s person’ Harry shrugged. 'Lou’ he said suddenly very serious and Louis’ heart skipped a beat.

'hm?’ he hummed queitly because he was in no state of actually talking.

'We're still going to hang out after your parents leave right? Cause like I know it is supposed to be just pretending when they’re here, but we could like be friends after?’ he asked in a small voice and Louis smiled fondly seeing how nervous he was. He layed on his side facing Louis but he wasn’t looking at him at all. He had one arm under his head and another was playing nervously with the hem of his shirt.

'I thought it was so obvious I didn’t even think of asking such a ridicoulus question. What did you think? That I’ll just loose your number after this?’ Louis teased cause he was pretty sure that if he would take the question seriously he would end up saying something like 'I could never leave you, I want to spend my life with you’ and that was definetly not what Harry wanted to hear.

'Oh, okay. I was just really enjoying myself with you’ Harry giggled lightly 'especially just now, and I just needed to make sure we’re on the same page’ he smiled and pick up Louis’ arm to sneak under in and cuddle into his side. And what the fuck Louis was supposed to say to that 'We're not on a same page, pretty boy, I’m literally hundreds ahead of you’ ? How could Harry not see this? Something that took Zayn, Niall or Grimmy one look to figure out? Was he just pretending? Or he was genuienly oblivious? Louis thought about Liam, who was probably in love with Harry. Is this how it happened? You start to hang out with him and you wait for a perfect moment to ask him out but somehow it never comes, and you find yourself years later entertaining someone who came by for a make out session? Oh God, Louis did not want to live this way.

'what’s the deal with you and Liam, by the way?’ Louis asked queitly. He had no idea how thick the walls in this apartment were.

'no deal at all. He’s my best friend.’ Harry answered in sleepy voice.

'um… no history there? Romantic or…?’ Louis asked tugging onto Harry’s shirt a little. He knew that the question was out of the line, since Harry didn’t owe him a recap of all his romantic and/or sexual partners but for some reason he really needed to know.

'No’ Harry laughed 'Well he did try to pick me up in the club when we met but he was way too drunk and sad for something to actually happen.’

'um yeah, he mentioned that' Louis said. So nothing happened. But just because nothing happened it didn't mean that Liam wasn’t a threat. What If this was one of those things where the best friend is in love with the main character for years and it takes some epic relationship mistake on the main characters part to realise 'oh there you are, it was you all along’. It could have been this story right? And what would that make Louis? Epic relationship mistake? God, he couldn't be that. This was not a movie, this was his life God damn it, and he will not just sit idly by.

'So I’m throwing a surprise party for Zayn and Niall this weekend. It’s their fourth anniversairy, you should come. You can bring Liam if you like.’

‘cool, I’ll ask him’.

Game on, Liam.

 


	4. Little babies, pink balloons and unexpected arrivals.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so so so so so sorry. Just my muse seemed to left me and I couldn't for the life of me write one word that made sense, but I'm back and I really hope you like it! 
> 
> After this chapter we're going to witness the glorious mess that are Genvieve and her husband- Louis' parents. TBC ladies and gents, hope you'll be back :)))

'Okay, Louis. Someone’s gotta say it.’ Niall announced friday morning looking at Louis worringly.

'what?’ Louis asked with wild eyes and a half blown pink balloon in his hand.

'You’ve gone completely mental.’ Niall stated while Zayn stood beside him nodding his head a little bit like a concern mother. Not that Louis would know, his mother wasn’t exactly the best example.

'What are you talking about?’ Louis asked taking tenative step back.

'Lou you’re throwing us anniversairy party and you spending a lot of money on it just so you could intimitade your fake boyfriend’s best friend who according to you has feelings for him, and oh you also asked us to pretend it was a surprise party because fuck knows why!’ Niall said with 'duh’ look.

Okay so maybe if you say it like that it sounds a little weird, but like whole anniversairy party is a nice gesture right? And he just blurted out that it was surprise so he couldn’t like change his mind now. He just wanted to check out how Liam and Harry interact together. It was fine. He was totally fine.

'I’m fine Niall.’ Louis said going back to blowing up the balloon. He had like hundred of those to pump today he couldn’t get distracted now.

'Lou.’ Zayn said stepping up beside him and taking a balloon out of his hands. 'Just look around’ he said softly so Louis rolled his eyes and did as he was told.

'I looked around and all I see is things very much nessesery to throw a sucssesful party!’ he said crossing his arms in front of his chest

'Dude you’re making sushi.’ Niall deadpanned

'Well that’s Harry’s favourite food!’

'and you bought cheap champagne even though you know Zayn always pukes when he’s drinking that’ Niall add with small smile

'well I bought a lot of liqour and Harry likes this one so Zayn can drink something else! There’s like a lot of other things too!’ Louis yelled defensively

'Dude our living room is pink. I’m guessing that’s Harry’s favourite colour? Cause it sure as hell isn’t ours’ Niall smirked pointing to the huge pink banner that read 'Happy 4th anniversairy Zayn and Niall!’

'Well Niall you didn't even want this party and you called me mental for throwing it so why do you suddenly care for color schemes?’

'I don’t care for colour schemes I care about the fact that you’re throwing a party for Harry,a guy you met like three weeks ago. And it’s not because you want to do something sweet for him like friends do, like a birthday party or something. No, you’re just jealous about a guy who for all you know is just his friend and you’re spending hundred of pounds on shit like balloons and glitter because he likes it and thinks it’s pretty. You also begged us to scrap our anniversairy plans to pretend to be surprised about your party, because you freaked out and you told him it was a surprise party for us. So like dude, I’m a little worried, because this whole thing is a little extra.’

'There’s no need to be worried okay? My parents are coming next week. They’ll be gone after two weeks or hopefully sooner and then I can just ask Harry to go out with me, only if he doesn’t run away with Liam until then or he won’t get grossed out by my parents who you both very well know are a fucking handful, so If you are worried or whatever Niall, I don’t need fucking lectures, what I need is a little bit of fucking support so you might as well pump a fucking balloon cause I only have a few hours before the party is starting and nothing is done yet!’ Louis exclaimed shoving balloons into Niall’s arms before leaning on the table and clutching onto it’s edge and closing his eyes. He sighed loudly and felt two bodies pressed against him almost immadietly. 'I’m sorry’ he whispered 'I didn’t mean to snap at you, I’m so sorry’ he whispered.

'It”s okay Lou.’ Niall whispered back.

'Let’s just pump some balloons yeah? One thing at the time Loulou?’ Zayn asked softly kissing his temple.

'You want me to do sushi? We both know you have no idea how to cook’ Niall said rubbing the small of Louis’ back.

'You don’t cook sushi’ Louis grumbled 'You like chop it all and then roll it into balls or something’

'I'm definetly making sushi then’ Niall laughed lightly.

Niall moved to the kitchen and Louis and Zayn blew up at least 50 balloons before Louis freaked out that they need karaoke machine and ran out to get one, God knows from where.

'we shouldn’t let him go out on his own’ Zayn said chewing on his finger.

'Oh look at you little momma bear.’ Niall cooed 'He’s going to be okay Z, he’s a big boy'

'I know he's a big boy but that doesn’t mean he’s okay. He’s a mess Niall’ Zayn sighed picking up pink party hats with little rainbows on them.

'A little bit yeah, but we’re doing what we can yeah? We’re helping him with the party, he’s going to be all better when he asks Harry out’ Niall said arranging sushi on a plate. Zayn looked at him confused.

'you do realise it’s not about Harry right?’ Niall shot him unimpressed look like he wanted to say 'We're standing in the middle of Harry Styles’ Narnia, don’t tell me it’s not about him’ 'Well, okay it is a little bit about him, Louis likes him I know, but he wouldn’t freak out so badly normally. But his parents are coming in few days, and you weren’t here the last time. Well you were, but we barely started to date and Louis was still in that whole 'I’ll kill you if you hurt him’ mode so you didn’t have a chance to witness it but… he’s completely breaking down when they come. He’s always a crazy neurotic mess before and he’s completely heartbroken during their visit and it takes him a lot of time to come back to his normal self. I don’t want this for him. Not fucking again.’ Zayn said and hanged the last balloon.

'Is there anything we can do?’ Niall asked queitly coming to stand in front of his boyfriend and grabbing him by his waist lightly

'Not really. If I could ban his parents from coming here I fucking would, trust me’ Zayn said with his expression hardened

'Look at you taking care of your duckling’ Niall teased 'But I hate to break it to you honey, but If someone is someone’s duckling you’re his’ he added kissing Zayn’s nose 'But I love that you care so much. Our children will be so lucky to have you as their dad' he smiled lightly and Zayn looked at him wide eyed. For a second both of them stopped to asses the reaction, Zayn looked like fish taken out of the water and Niall went completely red, which didn’t happen to him so often.

'Shit. Did I jump the gun on this one? I just… fuck… I’m sorry, I just thought that we were heading there and all, but I know that we should have a conversation about it, fuck, sorry’ Niall started to babble

'um no, no! This is just the first time I hear about you even wanting children’ Zayn said with a little bit of panic evident in his voice.

'Yes I do. Couple of them actually. Three maybe?’ Niall asked with a shy smile rubbing his neck in embarasment.

'Three. Wow, that’s like… wow. I… you know I … I think we need more balloons. Yes, cause… I don’t want Louis to like freak out, and … yes I...I think I’ll just go get some yeah? Yeah. Great. Um, I’ll be back’ Zayn was mumbling and moving backwards towards the door and all Niall could do is watch him disappearing through the them.

'what the fuck is wrong with everyone today?’ he sighed rubbing his eyes.

He knew that Zayn had a hard time with things changing. He liked his routine and Niall respected it, but then again they were together for four years, they’ve been living with each other for most of it, was it really this crazy to think about stuff like that? About starting family together, marriage kids and all that jazz?

Zayn and Louis came back after few hours but Zayn wasn’t touching the subject so Niall decided to give him time, it was their fourth anniversairy so he wanted to have fun today and be in love with his boyfriend even though they had to stay for a party. He refused though to let it hang over their heads the whole night so when they were getting ready to leave before first guests would arrive he stood behind Zayn and held him close by the waist.

'I know you’re freaking out now, and I wanted to say that there’s no need. We can talk when you want to talk, okay?’ he whispered softly into his ear and felt Zayn stiffen and then relax under his touch

'Ni, I…’ Zayn started but Niall didn’t have any of it

'No baby, really. I’m not mad or sad or whatever you think, I love you. I’ve been loving you for over 4 years, that’s not going to change whatever your stand on kids is. But today is not about that okay? Today is about us.’ he said softly turning Zayn around 'Well okay, mostly today is about Louis, but you know what I mean’ he teased softly

'I’m sorry about that by the way, I know you had things planned for today' Zayn said fixing Niall’s collar and looking him in the eyes

'we’ll do them another time’ Niall shrugged 'Don’t be sorry, it’s noone’s fault, well maybe Louis’ parents, for coming to town days after our anniversairy’

'You, Niall Horan, are a great man.’ Zayn said touching his cheek. 'I’m thankful for every day you chose to spend with me’

'I love you’ Niall whispered already moving towards Zayn’s lips with hunger that didn’t go away even after years of being together, Zayn didn’t even have a chance to respond before Niall’s lips were on his.

'Yeah, you’re gross, you need to leave now’ they heard Louis and they reluctantly pulled away from each other to see Louis all dolled up standing at the door. 'Guests will be here any minute’

'knock much?’ Niall asked annoyed 'It is our anniversairy’ he added

'well 4th one, so it like barely counts. It’s hardly the first and it's not big one like 10th so don’t be such a cry baby about it. Chop, chop motherfuckers!’ Louis chirpped happily shooing them away.

'You are the worst’ Niall said rolling his eyes fondly.

'goodbye babies, be back in like an hour!’ Louis said blowing them a kiss.

After they left Louis was left to pace anxiously around the living room until first guests started to show up. All of them brought presents which was nice gesture maybe Niall will finally shut up about this whole party when he gets some free stuff. He was making drinks and chatting to people but still he was always looking at the door waiting for Harry to show up. After half an hour the doorbell rang again and Louis opened the door to find Harry and Liam on the other side.

'Hi Lou!’ Harry singsonged happily holding a huge pink box in front of him.

'hi guys’ Louis answered playing it cool. Because the hand that Liam was keeping on the small of Harry’s back was not annyoing him at all. He let them inside the house and took the present from Harry’s arms so he could take off his jacket 'Wow this is huge!’

'That’s what he said’ Liam mumbled smirking and Harry laughed out loud

'yes, that’s not the first I’m hearing this one’ Harry giggled 'I bought them a record player. It even has a little bow on it! Wrapped it myself!’ he said with a proud grin and Louis needed to physically stop himself from petting him and replying with 'good boy'. What. The. Fuck.

'record player? H, That must have been expensive. You barely know them!’ he said instead

'I know, but really it wasn’t that expensive, I found this in a vintage shop!’ God he was so eager and excited about everything

'That’s amazing Haz, I’m sure they’ll love it' Louis smiled 'Do you want something to drink?’

'Beer please?’ Liam asked

'Um, do you have something fruity and possibly pink?’ Harry asked worrying his lip between his teeth.

'I got few cases of that champagne you like’ Louis smiled 'I just put this on a pile and I get you your drinks’

He took care of everything in a record speed and after few minutes he was pushing through people with three glasses in his hand he was walking carefully not to spill anything, Zayn will literally kill him If he got anything on the carpet. He saw Harry and Liam sitting on the couch and he nearly tripped over his feet because Harry was sitting in Liam’s lap. The situation was even more serious than he thought then.

'Hi!’ he yelled louder than nessescery and handed them glasses. He wiggled his way onto the couch next to them effectively pushing some girl out of the way. She shot him offended look but he didn’t even register that. He was too busy looking at Harry’s hand that was playing with Liam’s hair on the nape of his neck. Shit.

'Thanks Lou this is awesome! I love the decour!’ Harry exclaimed sucking on a straw. Who told Louis that giving this boy things to suck on was a good idea?! He was going to pass out. Definetly.

‘I thought I’ll go all out’ Louis shrugged.

They made small talk and Liam was annyoing. The most annyoing thing about him was the fact that he was funny. And smart, and really nice. That was the deal breaker for Louis. Who needed their rival to be all of those things AND having impressive biceps? When he got a text from Zayn and Niall that they’re coming back he arranged everyone to yell surprise and he had to give it to his best friends they looked perfectly surprised, especially when Niall eyed the mountain of gifts that was waiting for them in their bedroom.

'they’re always sitting together! For crying out loud I can’t even talk to him alone for a second!’ Louis complained to Zayn after few hours when all of them were a little more drunk.

'well it’s not like Liam knows anyone else here. Harry only knows the three of us and Grimmy so it’s not this weird that they’re hanging out together’ Zayn said trying to reason with Louis and watching with one eye as Niall was playing beer pong on the other side of the room.

'Louis!’ They heard Harry slur and waking towards them alone like he wanted to proove Louis wrong.

'hey Haz! What’s up?’ he asked when Harry collided with him and giggled into his neck.

'You smell good’ Harry mumbled nosing at Louis’ neck and making him shiver. 'I wanted to ask something' he whispered a little confused before a realisation downed on his face 'Oh! I know! Can Jordan come? He wasn’t suppose to but he just texted that he has tommorow off and he could come! Can he come?’ and great, that’s exactly what Louis needed, another probably beautiful guy hanging off Harry today, but when the younger boy was looking at him with such hopeful eyes he couldn’t say no to him.

'Sure thing Curly’ he smiled instead

'Awesome! I have to tell Li! Liam!’ he yelled and just like that he was off.

'You see what I mean?’ Louis asked Zayn and sinked into the couch.

They were drinking in silence when Louis noticed that Zayn was tearing off the label of his beer bottle, which was the thing he only did when he was pondering something.

'What’s wrong?’ Louis asked his best friend.

'Niall said something about kids today. Apparently he wants three. With me’ Zayn whispered

'And that’s a problem because?’ Louis asked dumbfonded.

'It’s not like a problem. But like, isn’t it early? Like what If we decide to do this but he’ll like change his mind?’ Zayn asked in small voice.

Louis looked at him stunned and sighed heavily. There it was again. He hugged him tightly and started to play with his hair to calm him down.

'why would he change his mind Z?’ he asked softly and when Zayn didn’t reply he added 'Just say it. I know you don’t like to say it aloud but just say it so I could knock some sense into you’.

'what If he finally leaves me? I mean it’s been four years Lou, he has to realise someday how much better he could do’ Zayn said in a small voice and blushed heavily, because even to him it sounded insane out loud. But still it wasn’t changing the way he felt.

'Zayn sweetie. He’s not going to realise he can do better because it’s simply not true. This boy loves you so much I swear I never saw someone love another person this fiercly. I know you can’t just turn your worries off and it’s okay, but I promise you have nothing to worry about. The only question you should be asking yourself is: do you want to have kids with him?’

'Of course I do!’ Zayn said deadly offended. 'I love him so much. I don’t even remember how it is to not love him.’

'Then you should tell him that. Because he may be thinking the same thing as you right now. That you’re not ready because there’s something wrong with him’ Louis said softly and both of them looked over at Niall who was drinking colorful drink with umbrella in it with five guys batting his eyelashes at him. One of them was Louis’ happily married straightest of a straights friend. Both Louis and Zayn snorted loudly.

'yeah okay it’s probably not the case’ Louis said through giggles.

'Definetly not’ Zayn agreed lightly 'But I should talk to him either way. Also If someone is going to grope him it should be me’ he said standing up.

'Go get your man' Louis swatted his ass 'It is your anniversairy after all’

'Now you remember!’ Zayn laughed rolling his eyes and Louis.

He moved through the room and pushed through the circle of admirers to get to Niall. And If he pushed a little harder than was strictly nessesery noone needed to know.

'Can I steal you for a second?’ he asked with a soft smile hugging his boyfriend’s waist.

'sure baby’ Niall smiled back and angled closer to Zayn.

They moved to their bedroom and sat in the pile of presents. Niall looked at them wide eyed

'Are we having sex or opening gifts? Cause I got to say love I’m very down with either.’ he said still eyeing the boxes and Zayn snorted. Niall looked like a little cartoon character, all eagerness and confusion.

'Neither. Well maybe sex in a few minutes. But first I wanted to talk to you. And I know you said that we don’t have to today but the truth is I don’t see a reason why we shouldn’t today. I have no idea why I freaked out so much, well I do, but it’s stupid. The point is: I was thinking about it too. About us and getting married and having kids. And there’s nothing I would love more than doing this with you.’ Zayn said kneeling in front of Niall and holding his hands in his own,and the smile Niall gave him could outshine the sun.

'Really?’ Niall said breathless, and after Zayn nodded he picked him up and pulled him into his lap. 'Well I reckon we should start making babies now. You know what they say practise makes perfect’ Niall wiggled his eyebrows and rolled his hips up

'You do realise that two guys biologically can't make babies right?’ Zayn responded giggling.

'That’s what I heard but we sure as hell can try’ Niall smirked and flipped them over on a bed.

When they were laying in bed after few hours, still sweaty and out of breath the party was already done. Whole apartment was quiet.

'hey’ Niall started softly 'Why did you freak out so much?’ Zayn just tucked himself further under Niall’s arm 'Tell me even If it’s stupid.’ Niall asked

'I was afraid we’re going to do this and then you’re going to leave me’ Zayn answered after few minutes, getting rid of the words all at once.

'Honey!’ Niall exclaimed and turned around to look at his boyfriend 'Do you really think I’m such a dick? That I would leave you with our baby?’

'No! No. More like.. you would realise that you could do better than me’ Zayn said blushing again.

'Oh bisquit’ Niall sighed and enveloped him in bone cracking hug 'The only one who will realise something here is you. Because I really hope that you finally will realise that I am the one that’s lucky to have you not the other way around' he whispered.

'Yeah but like, you were dating a lot of people before, and now it’s just me and I only had like one boyfriend before you and I barely even kissed him cause we were in highschool then and you.. you lived so much’ Zayn sttutered out.

'It doesn’t mean I’m going to get bored of you! Yes I tried a lot of things, but that’s just it: I tried them all and I liked you the best. They don’t compare to you, they could never compare to what we have’

Zayn just buried himself against Niall’s chest and wrapped his waist with his hands, signing heavily.

'I know all of that, just sometimes I forget

'I know baby. It’s fine. I’m just going to remind you everyday’ Niall whispered softly and the only reply he got from Zayn was a soft snore. He smiled widely, because his boy was just about the cutest thing ever, and after kissing his head he closed his eyes too.

Waking up after the party when you are in your late 20 was just about the worst. Your body suddenly forgets how it is to cope with hangover and everything hurts like a bitch whole day. That’s why the breakfest at Tomlinsons that day wasn’t the most exciting affair. Louis, Zayn and Niall were all sitting by the table drinking water and eating greasy food.

'Did you made breakfest?’ Zayn asked looking at Louis stunned.

'No, are you kidding me? Harry did before he went home. Um he, Liam and Jordan slept here’ Louis said getting a little bit fidgety.

'Did Harry slept with you?’ Niall asked perking up.

'um.. yes, we slept on the couch, I gave my bed to Liam and Jordan.’ he anwered wiggiling in his seat again.

'why are you being weird?’ Zayn asked him with narrowed eyes.

'No reason’ Louis answered way too fast for it to be believable.

'He is weird isn’t he?’ Niall said eyeing him carefully 'What did you do with Harry?’

'Nothing!’ Louis squeled and was met with two unimpressed stares from his friends 'Well we kissed a little but it was like for practise’

'Oh yes, sure thing, making out drunk after the party seems like practise’ Niall said in a mocking tone

'Yeah that's not why you’re weird’ Zayn said then still not taking his eyes off Louis 'What happened?’

'That's it! I swear!’

'yeah it’s not. We know you. Spill it little one’ Niall interjected.

Normally Louis would whack him in the head for calling him a little one but today he felt way too guilty for that.

'Um… Jordan is actually Liam’s boyfriend. He’s like semi professional football player. With like biceps and beard, and they’ve been together for almost two years’ he said slumping his shoulders.

'So you want to tell us that you threw this party…’ Niall started

‘... spend tons of money on it…’ Zayn added

‘...made us give up our anniversairy plans…’

‘...to intimidate this guy who didn’t even have to be intimidated because he's dating pro football player with facial hair?!’

'yes.’ Louis squeled terryfied and Niall burst with laughter that echoed through the entire apartment and he started to clap Louis on the back while Zayn was nearly on the floor from giggling so much.

'Legend Tommo!’ Niall choked out, and snorted loudly

'God you’re such a twat Lou’ Zayn laughed

'So you’re not mad?’ Louis asked still not sure what really happened

'well what’s the point in that?’ Zayn shrugged 'Just promise me you ask him out in a few days. Because really you’re making yourself insane and us too’

Before Louis could answer his phone ring making them all jump, Louis looked at his screen that read Genvieve with the picture of his mother underneath it. He showed the phone to his friends and gulped loudly before picking up.

'Hello Genvieve’ he said with cold tone.

He nodded few times and said 'Yes mother’ before finally hanging up. suddenly the atmosphere in the kitchen was unbearable, Zayn and Niall were staring at Louis intensely wanting to know what his mother could possibly want days before their visit. She never called, they were both sure it was her second call that year.

Louis finally looked at them with wild eyes and whispered:

'they came to London earlier. They’re here'

Well, let’s get this party started, then.


	5. Posh galas, dowries and disappointments.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry? *peeks out from under the blanket* I'm really really sorry for taking this long I want to swear that I'll be better but I don't think I will :D
> 
> anyway I still love you guys to pieces! :)

'Thank you so much for doing this’ Louis said tugging onto Harry’s collar in front of the hotel restaurant and buttoning his shirt up.

'Lou it’s fine, I got a lot of clothes out of the equation’ Harry smiled softly and grabbed Louis’ hands. 'I like my buttons just fine, love, no need to button me up to my neck’ he smiled lightly. Louis froze and looked at Harry’s chest like he just now realised what he was doing.

'Sorry’ he said sheepishly

'It’s okay.’ Harry said squeezing his hands. 'We’re going to be fine, love. I got you’ 

Louis let himself fall deep into those green eyes and took a breath to calm himself. Eyes were working a little, breathing? Not so much. 

'Let’s just go in before I loose all the composure I still have’ he sighed and took Harry’s hand in his. 

They stepped through the door of the restaurant and went over to the waitress. 'Good evning. Reservation under Tomlinson? I believe my parents are already here.’ he said with small smile, the biggest he could conjure at this moment.

'This way sirs’ she said smiling and led them through the restaurant all the way to the private room at the back. When she opened the door Louis froze for a second and squeezed Harry’s hand so tight that he was fairly sure he cut off his circulation. Then his eyes fell onto blonde smiling girl sitting on his right and just like that he felt relief flooding his insides.

'Lots!’ he yelled excited 'I didn’t know you were coming too!’ she stood up and hugged him tightly while whispering to his ear 'Of course I came I wouldn’t just leave you with those two alone’ He hugged Blake- Lottie’s boyfriend and turned around to face his parents.

Genevieve Tomlinson was french beauty that grew up in little town in the south of France and met Anthony Tomlinson while he was vacationing in his family home there. He wanted beautiful wife to impress his colleagues and she wanted rich husband to get out of suburbs and move to big city. Needless to say it was match made in heaven. 

'Bonjour Louis’ his mom said kissing the air near his cheeks three times.

'Good evening son’ his father said squeezing his hand with terrifying strength, he believed that the stronger the handshake the more manly you get.

'Oh, everyone, I wanted to introduce you to someone’ he said with a little shake to his voice 'This is Harry. My boyfriend’ he said eyeing his parents reaction and it did not disappoint him. Or maybe it did? Could you even get disappointed after years of lack of acceptance? His father looked down at his feet as typical homophobic straight male terrified that you can catch gayness just by looking at one and his mother pursed her lips like Louis was a naughty dog that peed on the carpet once again. 

'oh my God! Boyfriend?! It’s so nice to meet you! I’m Charlotte! And this is my boyfriend Blake. Wow it’s so nice to meet you!’ she laughed, getting overly excited and Louis could see Harry getting more relaxed as his sister pulled him into bone cracking hug. 

'Nice to meet you too. And I heard a lot about both of you!’ Harry said shaking hands with Blake.

'Mate your shirt is awesome!’ Blake smiled 'Where did you buy it? Charlie you think I would look good in it?’ he asked Lottie.

'Not everyone can pull of zebra, I’m afraid you too blonde for that shirt. Leopard print perhaps?’ she answered seriously

'They had those in leopard too’ Harry dimpled 'If you’re staying in town for few days we can definitely go shopping. Lou is way too fed up with me taking ages in stores!’ he chuckled. 

'That’s not my fault that you’re taking forever in there’ Louis said rolling his eyes.

'Charlie is the same way! She’s always yelling at me to get on with it. Must be Tomlinson' genes.’ Blake laughed jovially.

'Nice to meet you Mrs. And Mr. Tomlinson’ Harry then said pretending to be not at all bothered about lack of acknowledgement.

'Yes. Good evening’ Genevieve said with still slightly constipated look. Louis could just see how unwillingness to make a scene and being rude was fighting in her with her radical views. His dad on the other hand just nodded his neck. Well at least he didn’t storm out and leave like he did when Louis came out. That was probably progress right? 

The waitress came by and took everyone’s order and Louis and Harry continued to chat with Lottie and Blake completely ignoring their parents. He told him beforehand that he will bring someone special to dinner, were they really that delusional to think that he will suddenly wake up one day straight as an arrow in mood for some boobs? Honestly. 

'So how is Oxford young ones?’ Louis asked smirking at his sister and her boyfriend.

'Tough.’ Lottie sighed 'But it’s a lot of fun too.’ 

'You’re both studying law right?’ Harry asked 

'yes’ Lottie smiled.

'Blake here will take over the company’ Anthony said with proud smile and Lottie looked like someone slapped her, Blake on the other hand looked like he was about to throw up.

'What?’ Louis hissed 'This is the first I’m hearing of this. With all due respect why the fuck would Blake have to take over the company when your daughter is studying law too?’ 

'Oh honey, after they get married and Charlotte will get pregnant there simply won’t be time for her to work. We’re proud of her for taking such ambitious steps but life will get in the way’ Genevieve answered like Louis just said the funniest joke of the century.

'What are you even talking about? You can work while pregnant, and you can also work while having children.’ Louis said feeling his rage bubble to the surface.

'But who would stay home with kids?’ Genevieve asked again like she was explaining something extremely obvious to a five year old.

'Nanny? Or even Blake? Maybe he wants to stay home? Or if he doesn’t you get a nanny? And then they both come home from work and nanny leaves? Why this is such a difficult concept for you to grasp?’ he snapped annoyed.

'Nanny simply won't do! A parent needs to be home to properly bring up kids! Like your mother was with you’ 

'And what a fine job she did. Despite herself probably’ Louis muttered.

'What was it son? Speak up!’ Anthony yelled.

'I said’ Louis said loudly on purpose 'That me and Lots turned out great despite you screwing us up every chance you got’ Louis hissed looking straight into his father’s eyes.

'Louis this is not the time and the place…’ Genevieve started in hushed tone.

'Time and a place for what? You think Blake and Harry don’t know? You think Blake is happy that you’re bringing his girlfriend down and use him to do it? Do you think I haven’t told Harry that you're misogynistic and homophobic to the bone? They know all of that so you don’t have to put the appearances up’ 

Charged silence fell onto the table and all Louis could feel was Harry’s hand squeezing his knee tightly. 

'So how is university?’ Genevieve asked after a beat has passed like nothing ever happened.Typical.

'It's great. I got a word that I’m getting a job after I graduate, will be working with Grimmy on his morning show’ Louis said smiling, and willing himself not to get sad or pissed at whatever obnoxious thing his parents will say next.

'In the … um radio? With that… man?’ Anthony asked getting red. When they first found out about Louis working with Grimmy- openly gay man, they were outraged. As they said they 'hoped Louis would grew out of this phase’. 

'Yes father, I’ve been working there for over a year now. With that man. His name is Nick. He actually introduced me and Harry’ Louis smiled fondly looking over at Harry and that was one thing he didn't need to fake. 

'Oh you work at the radio too?’ Blake asked knowing full well Louis’ parents won’t extend conversation on Harry.

'No, I study law and I work in Bucknell & Pearce’ Harry smiled and turn to Anthony 'I hope it's not a conflict of interest I know they’re your biggest competition’ he dimpled, and Louis admired how effortlessly it all came to him, he didn't remember the last time he genuinely smiled at his father.

'No.’ His father answered with furrowed eyebrows like he was conflicted about something. Yes dad, Tomlinson man can’t resist those dimples, no matter how hard you try.

'Load of my chest!’ Harry exclaimed happily 'I would hate to start off on the wrong foot with Lou’s parents’ Louis detected a hint of sarcasm in that statement but it was so well hidden that he didn’t believe anyone else caught up on it. 

'That’s … nice’ Genevieve noted and she looked like she had to physically force the words out of her mouth. 

'Speaking of nice! I love your necklace! Pearls are so elegant and timeless! You simply look divine, if you don’t mind me saying so’ Harry smiled again and Louis almost snorted. Good boy. He knew exactly how to get Genevieve to like him.

'Merci’ she whispered delighted. Louis was sure that the delight won’t last long, she will remember why she hates him in a minute. 'Louis ma cheri, there's a gala that your father was invited to, Charlotte and Blake are coming, will you join us?’ 

'When is it?’ he asked innocently

'This Saturday night' 

'Babe you free Saturday? Wanna get all dolled up and join me on a red carpet?’ he winked Harry’s way.

'Oh my God yes! Do you think I can wear my sequin blazer or is it going to be too much?’ Harry asked with a little smirk flipping over his hair. 

'Whatever you wear I’m going to be taking it off at the end of the night either way so sequins are fine with me’ Louis giggled and heard his father choking on air and his mother clearing his throat.

'Oh sorry, I forgot we had company!’ Louis exclaimed innocently 'This one here, always distracting me’ Louis added looking Harry up and down and then sending discreet wink Lottie's way. She giggled into her plate. 'well mother we’ll be honored to join you!’ Louis concluded with clasp of hands knowing full well that he got them. There was no way they will say that Harry can't go since he was sitting right in front of them.

The whole meal went by the same fashion, and after third glass of wine Louis leaned in and kissed Harry’s neck softly. After fourth one Harry was feeding him spaghetti, and after fifth one Lottie demanded they recreate Lady and The Tramp’s iconic scene while taking photos excessively. Needless to say Anthony and Genevieve had trouble with hiding their outrage. They were trying though, his dad was red and looked like he’s about to blow up, his mother on the other hand was pale as paper. Louis though found himself having fun, well, as much fun as he could have in that close proximity of his parents, and when they were getting ready to leave and he slapped Harry’s bum walking out he could swore he heard his mother gasping for air. Good. 

'Lots, Blaky!’ Louis said grabbing Harry’s waist 'Why don’t you stay in my place? I have one spare bedroom! We can catch up!’

'we thought you say that which is why we didn’t even get a room’ Lottie laughed 'Wait for us outside and hail a cab or something, we’ll get our things from parent’s room’ she said kissing their cheeks and tugging on Blake’s hand leading him out. 

'Well Tony, Jenny’ Louis smirked knowing full well how much their parents hated nicknames 'We’ll better be off!’ 

'yes it’s a long way home’ Harry smirked 'My place would have been closer but I can’t sleep without my little blanky here now can I?’ he cooed at Louis who snorted not being able to hold the charade any more.

'I’m the blanky? It’s you who’s always sprawling on top of me like an octopus’ he giggled.

'Well maybe I enjoy being on top of you’ Harry murmured quietly but not quiet enough for Louis’ parents not to hear. 

'I bet you do’ Louis answered with coy grin. 'well--’ he faced his parents ‘-- it was so nice to meet you! Seriously I nearly forgot why we literally never do this! Au revoir!’ he saluted them and without waiting for their reply he pulled Harry out of the room.

'Good night mom! Dad! Nice to meet you!’ Harry yelled after them and Louis burst with laughter.

'Oh my God! You did not just call them mom and dad’ he couldn't stop laughing 'They will never forgive you for that. They have enough trouble with me calling them that's he giggled.

'Well I’m nothing if not creative’ Harry snickered, and grabbed Louis by his waist, tugging him close to his body and kissing him senseless.

'You, Louis Tomlinson are a wonderful man’ he said looking into his eyes with serious expression when they came up for air 'And I have no idea how you came from that' he said pointing to the now closed door 'But you are extraordinary. And they can’t stand that because they are ordinary.’ Louis’ breath hitched and his head was swimming. What does this mean? Why is he kissing him like that when noone is around and they are not practising? Is it possible that he may like Louis back? Oh my God. What does it mean?!

'Thank you’ he whispered softly willing his voice not to waver. He mostly succeeded. 

'You’re welcome love. I told you- I got you.’ Harry said placing one last soft kiss to his cheek before stepping back 'do you want to tell your sister the truth or …?’ he trailed off

'Yeah of course, I don’t need to hide anything from her, she would also kill me If she'd find out I lied to her. I need to tell her before she starts planning our wedding’ Louis chuckled.

'okay, so I guess we can take the same cab in case your parents see us outside? And I can just drop you off on my way home’ Harry said walking Louis out of the building.

'Or you can go with us? It’s Saturday! You don’t have to go anywhere tomorrow and we’ll probably end up drinking with Zayn and Niall so if you want to join us?’ Louis asked looking down at his feet.

'Oh.. you sure? I mean I don’t want to impose on your time with your sister.’

'Nonsense!’ Louis waved his hand 'Oh that is if you're not tired’ he added unsure of himself.

'Nonsense’ Harry mimicked and Louis chuckled lightly.

'That’s settled then’ Louis smiled. 

An hour, a trip home and a trip to the store to get more expensive alcohol later the six of them were lounging on the couches in Louis’ apartment.

'I can’t believe you hired someone to play your boyfriend’ Lottie laughed again right after Louis filled her in on his little plan.

'If you can’t join them beat them!’ Louis giggled getting a little tipsy.

'I’m pretty sure it’s the other way around love’ Harry laughed by his side snorting some whiskey through his nose.

'Whatever’ Louis drawled 'You get my drift’ he giggled wiggling his eyebrows at Harry.

'Oh I wish I did’ Harry murmured with a smirk. Harry was pretty. He was so pretty, and his eyes were like shining. What did he do with them? Do you get some special star dust when you’re that pretty? Louis wouldn’t know. Harry was just so so pretty. And his dimples. God his dimples were just perfect. Little holes in cheeks. Awesome. 

Louis reached his hand and placed a finger over Harry’s dimple. It deepened under his touch. He giggled. God he was so drunk. 

'Ehem’ Lottie cleared her throat smirking.

'Yes Charlotte?’ Louis asked raising an eyebrow.

'Oh god’ she groaned 'Don't call me Charlotte you sound just like mother’ 

'She would be thrilled to know that. She waited her whole life for me to be just like her’ Louis noted sarcastically

'Wrong. She waited for you to be like dad. She wants me to be like her’ Charlie noted with a roll of eyes.

'Touche. What the fuck is the deal with the company anyway?’ Louis asked

'You heard them. I’m a women, my brain is way to small to comprehend running an entire company!’ she exclaimed sarcastically.

'What?’ Zayn asked with huge eyes finally ungluing himself from Niall and looking at Lottie worryingly. 

'They told us like two weeks ago, that they decided to give Blake the company. Since the only child that decided to pursue law is missing one key ingredient in order to be a successful businessman and that is a dick apparently.’ Lottie explained looking tired.

'That’s just fucking bullshit!’ Niall exclaimed outraged 'Jesus, I don’t mean to be rude but what the fuck is wrong with your old folks?’ 

'They’re the perfect example of white privelage and narrow mindness?’ Louis asked rhetorically. 'Um Blake, I wanted to apologize for today, I was pretty pissed about the whole thing, I didn’t want you to think I had some kind of a problem with you, cause you know I absolutely adore you! It’s just Jenny and Tony’ 

'Lou come on, I know you didn’t attack me.’ Blake said smiling 'And I’m not going to do it. Me and Charlie decided to go into nonprofit months ago. We already have few organisations that could use a good lawyer, apparently they don’t get a lot of Oxford graduates.’ 

'Non profit? I reckon parents must have been thrilled about that' Louis noted sardonically.

'Now we can both be disappointments!’ Lottie cheered faux happily.

‘To disappointments!’ Louis giggled raising his glass.

‘To disappointments!’ everyone cheered alongside with him. 

The day of the gala Louis was nervous wreck. He spent all morning laying in bed and peeling himself with every scrub, and body wash and lotion he could find. He also shaved twice and he plucked his eyebrows. He put on his suit, well fitted, all black and spend two hours on putting his hair in a quiff. He went into the living room where Blake was already waiting for Lottie to get ready. He sat next to him and Blake wordlessly handed him the glass of whiskey. He was around for years now, he knew the drill. Louis downed in one go and Blake replaced the glass with full one. Louis sipped it slowly while banging his fingers on the couch. 

‘We’re picking Harry up or he’s coming over?’ Blake asked.

‘We’re picking him up. Just as soon as Lottie will get ready’ Louis laughed nervously just as his phone rang.

'Hi H! We’ll be at yours in like 20 minutes, we’re just waiting for Lottie’ he said quickly when he saw the caller ID.

'Yeah um.. Lou we have a slight problem.’ Harry said sounding nervous, Louis straighten up on the couch with his stomach swirling with worry.

'My boss just called me. There is some problem with the merger and I need to deliver some documents to the law firm downtown right now. I’m in no position to tell him no, I tried asking him If I could do that later tonight or tomorrow morning possibly but he made it quite clear that my job is on the line here. I can’t afford to lose it Lou’ Harry said apologetic.

'Oh! Well it’s not ideal but it’s fine. I mean you can’t lose your job I get it. Or I can go with you?’ Louis asked hopefully

'I have to go to the office first and check those papers and make sure everything is in place I have no idea how much it will take me, I’m on my way there right now. I’m going to be super fast about it okay? I’ll try to be at the gala as soon as I can' 

'That's fine, love. I’ll leave your name at the door then. Meet me there?’ 

'okay Lou. I’m so sorry about this’ Harry whispered.

'No baby, you have nothing to be sorry about, not your fault.’ Louis assured him 'I’ll be waiting for you. Bye love’ 

He put his phone down and swallowed loudly. He was freaking out a little not ready to face his parents without Harry's calming presence, and he knew that Lottie and Blake will be there but still they were a couple they will go and do their couple stuff and Louis will be left there sitting between his parents and soaking up every ounce of toxines those two could provide. Someone put him out of his misery. Now.

'Harry’s going to be late. Some work emergency. He’ll meet us there’ he sighed and hid his face in his hands.

'Does he know that you are into him for real?’ Blake asked then replacing his empty glass with the full one. Louis looked up at him with a lie ready on his tongue but he was met with condescending gaze.

'No. He does not.’ he admitted reluctantly.

'why? He seems like he might be interested too’ Blake said smiling

'Maybe he is. I don’t know, I get a lot of mixed signals. The point is I would rather him knowing what he’s getting himself into. Give my daddy time to try to pay him off or threaten him that he’ll never find a job in any law firm in England and If he won’t run for the hills then I’ll ask him out’ Louis answered with maniac smile.

'You got a shit deal mate. You and Charlie both. Noone’s disputing that. But it won’t be long now, yeah? You’ll finish uni and you can tell them to kiss your ass’ Blake grinned and Louis found himself grinning right back. Telling his parents were to stick it was a topic of his rather vivid dreams more times that he cared to admit. 

The gala was just as Louis imagined it would be. Which was hell. It was posh and full of people with head’s up each other’s asses and Louis just really wanted to throw a match on it all and let them all burn. They would probably catch fire rather quickly with the amount of hairspray and cologne Louis could smell. He stepped through the doors after his parents and was led by them through the room with his mum holding him in tight grip. He stood by them and made small talk with people he never met and he was ready to jump off the balcony when they finally rounded to the Calders. His father’s partner and his wife.

'Timothy! Catherine!’ his mother exclaimed loudly and placed three kisses on Catherine’s cheeks.

'We’re so glad to see you both, what a fine pair you make, Genevieve you simply outdone yourself yet again! You’re a vision darling!’ Mrs. Calder said with fake smile. Or maybe it was just too much botox.

'Indeed you look divine dear. We are two lucky bastard aren’t we Anthony?’ Mr. Calder laughed jovially slapping Louis’ dad on the back.

'Oh may I introduce, our lovely daughter- Eleanor’ Catherine said motioning to the tall beautiful girl with dark wavy hair and tight red dress. Dress like that was almost scandalous at the event like this but she was pulling it off. 'Poor thing is here by herself and we're boring her to death’ she added then with sardonic smile.

'Louis is here by himself too!’ his mother exclaimed and Louis just now started to piece everything together. Those basstards. 'I’m sure he can keep Eleanor company!’ 

'certainly, but first father can I have a word with you?’ Louis interjected stiffly before his mother was even finished. He led his dad to out of hearing distance and asked him through gritted teeth: 'Did you call in a favour and have Harry run around town just now because you wanted me to be here alone so I can be Eleanor’s date?’ 

'I did’ his father answered calmly

'Are you kidding me?’ Louis whispered-yelled. 'Jesus. Why am I even surprised?! I mean you did pay off my last long time boyfriend why did I think for a second that it’s going to be different now.’ Louis threw his hands up with frustration 'I’m going to say this again: I’m gay dad. I like men, I fall in love with men, I kiss men and I have sex with men, one day I’m going to grow old with a men and start a family with him and there’s not a single thing you can do to stop it. So excuse me, while I go and talk to Eleanor, I think she deserves an explanation’ Louis ended and tried to turn around and leave but his father stopped him.

'Don’t you dare tell her about your… ‘ he motioned his hands around in some vague gesture, God he couldn't even say it! 'Don’t embarrass me and your mother in front of our friends!’ he hissed.

'oh you do that all on your own, dad’ he spit out the last word 'you don’t need my help in that department’ he pulled his arm out of his father’s grasp and came back to the circle asking Eleanor if she wanted to get a drink. She looked bored at most. Good, if she’s not interested at least maybe she won’t be too pissed when she finds out their parents set her up with gay guy.

They stood by the bar and sipped champagne when Louis finally spoke up.

'I have to apologize for my parents. I just now realised it was supposed to be some kind of a set up’ Louis said sheepishly

'No joke.’ she muttered 'They only tried to get us together since we were babies. Too bad we don’t leave in medieval era.’ 

'Well the point is you are really lovely but I’m gay. So whatever they think is going to happened definitely won’t’ he said then waiting with held breath for her reaction. To his confusion he beamed at him for the first time with genuine happiness on her face.

'Oh my God this is perfect! I have a boyfriend actually! My parents don't even know about him, cause he's a model. They would flip out, so I couldn't bring him here, but I thought I be stuck all night with my dad’s mini-me’ she laughed delighted.

'Oh my God, thank god! I thought you're going to be pissed, I mean either way it was a dick move on parents part especially since my boyfriend will be here any minute’ Louis smiled.

'Oh… you're out to them?’ she asked with huge eyes.

'yeah, came out when I was 17. They still haven’t say the word gay out loud’ Louis laughed nervously.

'Fuck that’s… that’s brave. Me and Max have been together for two years and I’m still too much of a chicken to tell my parents. I’m just so fucking scared that they will take away this company from me and I worked so fucking hard for this. I’m killing myself at Harvard and I’m also doing my double diploma in English law in Oxford and I couldn't stand them taking everything away’ she said leaning into Louis 'I’m sorry’ she laughed then sheepishly 'I just… people get it but they don’t really GET it, you know? And I feel like you just might’ 

'They can listen and know the situation and sympathies but If they didn’t live through it they won’t really know what it’s like’ Louis nodded. 'It's fine, okay you told me your secret I tell you mine in return’ he turn around to her with a smirk 'My boyfriend? The one that's going to join me any minute'? Not really my boyfriend. Just a guy I got to play the part of my boyfriend so I could annoy my parents into oblivion’ Eleanor laughed loudly throwing her head back.

'Oh my God I can’t believe you did that! Can I annoy your parents too?’ she snickered.

'Be my guest, dear’ Louis laughed.

'I wish I could be more like you. Max is getting impatient. He feels like I’m ashamed of him. He doesn’t understand that it's not him who I’m ashamed of. It’s them.’ Eleanor said quietly.

'I’m in love with my fake boyfriend' Louis chirped in.

'we're both screwed then?’ she asked raising her eyebrows.

'Definitely. At least…’ he turned around and handed her another flute of champagne ‘... we can go down drunk’ he finished with mischievous smile.

'you read my mind!’ she giggled.

'He’ll come around you know.’ Louis said after a beat has last 'Max. He can’t get it because he doesn’t know how it's like, but he’ll come around, you just need to make him understand. I can help if you want’ Louis smiled.

'I hope he will. I can’t really blame him. The truth is… how long am I going to wait? My father is what 50 now? He won’t retire until he’s at least 70. So I’m going to be waiting for 20 years? That's not very realistic’ 

'So you only have one option left. Tell them. Let the flames begin. You can wait until you have your diploma just to make sure they won't stop paying your tuition, but after that, fuck them, and even If they do take away your company so what? You’ll start your own. My sister is studying law at Oxford and they don’t want to give her the company because she’s a girl. They insist that Tomlinson's shares will go to her boyfriend cause she’ll be too busy having babies and being a housewife.’ 

'Maybe we should start Tomlinson & Calder 2.0. Me and your sister, having babies and kicking criminal asses all at the same time’ she giggled

'That’s a great idea for a tv series right there' Louis giggled too, when he felt his phone vibrating. 'Oh do you mind If I take it? It’s my fake boyfriend’ he smiled at Eleanor and when she nodded with a smile he pressed the phone to his ear.

'Hi Lou! Um… did you leave my name at the door? Cause well I’m standing here and they refuse to let me in’ he said then quietly.

'Are you kidding me? Be right there babe, I’m so sorry, wait for me’ he said and quickly disconnected the phone.

'Well it looks like my parents are doing everything they in their power to stop Harry from coming here. He’s stuck outside they don’t want to let him in, I’m assuming my father had little something to do with it.’ Louis hissed through gritted teeth

'I’ll come with. My aunt owns this hotel, I’m pretty sure I can overrule your father' El smiled putting down her glass.

'Thank you so much’ 

They moved through busy hall and stepped outside. Louis could see Harry almost immediately standing next to the security guard, wearing geometric suit with black shirt. He looked incredible. He beamed at Louis , and Louis thought how much he didn’t deserve that blinding smile. Because of him he was running some made up errands and stood outside of the hotel like a stalker, and no amount of vintage high fashion clothing could make up for it.

'Harry! Hello love’ Louis said and kissed his cheek 'What’s seems to be a problem?’ he turned around to the security guard.

'I’m sorry mr. Tomlinson but I’m under strict orders to not let mr. Styles in’ the guy answered and Louis actually felt bad for him, the guy looked more than sorry and uncomfortable.

'Why Dylan!’ Eleanor exclaimed 'I believe mr. Styles here is my guest, so If some other guests have a problem with his presence at this party they can take it up with my aunt.’ Eleanor smiled sweetly.

'Ms. Calder! So nice to see you’ the guy bowed slightly 'I.. I really don’t know what to tell you’ 

'Look Dylan, I know it was my father who came to you, and I hate to bring you into what is simply a family feud I really need to insist on my boyfriend being let inside. If my father comes back tell him I threatened to fire you. He would love that!’ Louis smiled sweetly.

'Dylan you known me since I was little, do you really think I’m going to let them fire you? If any problem arise I will talk to my aunt personally. Better yet, I’m going to talk to her when I get back in, I promise your job is not at stake’ she smiled at the older man and squeezed his arm.

'Alright.’ Dylan nodded after heavy pause. 'I would appreciate you talking to Ms. Smith. I can’t afford to lose this job. I’m sorry about this commotion Mrs. Styles. May you and your partner have a lovely evening’ he smiled at them warmly.

'It’s really not your fault’ Harry dimpled again and three of them moved inside.

'I’m Elenor by the way’ El smiled extending her hand to Harry.

'Harry. Eleanor Calder? Law royalty, Harvard prodigy and Lou’s future wife?’ he dimpled with sarcastic smile.

'The one and only. And not fiancée yet, I believe our parents can’t settle on the dowry’ she giggled.

'Thank you for your help. You sure that Dylan won’t lose his job over this?’ Harry asked worrying.

'Definitely not. I’ll go find my aunt right away, fill her in on all the details.’ she smiled

'Just tell her everything yeah? That it was my father trying to keep out my boyfriend. I would hate for innocent guy to became a collateral damage. And my father can be quite petty’ Louis said.

'No worries Lou. My aunt is cool, and she really fucking hates your dad’ she laughed.

'She’s not the only one’ Louis sing songed.

'I’ll find you later boys’ she winked at them and left. 

'Harry I’m so so sorry’ Louis blurted out the second she was out of sight. 'My dad called in for a favour with your law firm to get you running around town today so you couldn’t make it, and he probably also told security to keep you out. They wanted to set me and Elenor up’ Louis admitted blushing heavily still ashamed of his parents actions even though he was used to them at this point.

'I figured. When I came to the law firm downtown noone was there waiting for those documents. And after what you told me about your parents I put two and two together’ Harry nodded with sad little smile.

'I’m really sorry. I know I warned you but I guess I still thought that maybe they will refrain this time’ Louis said shaking his head.

'Lou it’s not your fault! Baby you don’t have to apologize for anything you’ve done nothing wrong. I’m just … I’m sorry! I’m sorry that you have to go through this, I can’t even begin to imagine how that must be like with someone you’re really with’ Harry said tugging onto Louis’ waist. 

'Well he actually gotten more sneaky over the years. With my last boyfriend he didn’t bother with such elaborate plans, he just paid him twenty thousand dollars to stay away from me’ Louis said resigned. 

'He… what?!’ Harry asked with pupils blown out 'He paid him off?! Louis… you said that they were bad, I just never knew it was this bad…’ Harry said quietly.

'It was long time ago. High School sweetheart’ Louis shrugged.

‘he took the money?’ Harry asked in hushed tone.

'he did. I don’t really blame him. He had four younger siblings and his mom was on her own. They always had financial problems. I know it’s not moral high ground but he did what he had to do’ 

'He let you go for only twenty thousand?’ Harry asked with raised eyebrow 'I’m your fake boyfriend and I still wouldn’t let go, even If he offered me twenty millions’ he smiled softly, and Louis heart flutter a little. He could actually feel it beating rapidly against his chest. 

'Appreciate it. But well my father has a lot up his sleeve’ 

'Bring it on’ Harry full on grinned and pulled Louis tighter to his body. Louis stumbled a little and clutched to Harry’s bicep to steady himself. Harry’s hold on his waist strengthened and Louis found himself impossibly close to the other boy. He looked at his lips and saw Harry licking them. He exhaled delicately, afraid to even breathe and waited for the pressure of Harry’s lips, he could see him getting closer when he heard someone clearing their throat. 

'Guys, I hate to interrupt this but the dinner is about to start’ Eleanor said smirking, raising an eyebrow at Louis and mouthing 'fake boyfriend?’ to him when Harry turned around. 

'Let’s go then!’ Harry exclaimed and pulled Louis by his hand.

'By the way I met Charlie and Blake! Your sister is great I believe Tomlinson & Calder 2.0 can still happen’ Eleanor smiled.

'It's about time someone save that name’ Louis snorted. 

They moved to the very front of the room where their table was set and Louis could saw his parents eyeing them with shock. Didn’t expect to see Harry then, huh? When they came near the table and Harry greeted everyone more or less enthusiastically they realised that only two seats were free. They looked at cards and saw Louis Tomlinson and Eleanor Calder written on the them. 

'Where's is Harry’s seat?’ Louis asked having a hard time hiding his rage looking straight at his parents

'We didn’t think he'd make it’ his mother answered sweetly.

'Well he did so…’ Louis started raising his voice but his mom stopped him mid sentence.

“I’m sure there’s a seat free at some other table dear’ she said evenly with sweet smile, and before Louis could explode Eleanor interjected.

'Why would he sit somewhere else?’ she asked with faux innocence ‘when he can just sit on his boyfriend's lap’ Eleanor smiled mischievously sending wink Louis’ way. Louis and Harry giggled and send her grateful smile. 'Excuse me’ Eleanor stopped a waiter walking by 'We’re going to need another set of plates and a chair, there’s been a mix up with a seating chart.’ when they guy nodded she thanked him and turned to Louis’ parents with proud smile 'Don’t worry Mrs and Mr Tomlinson, I’m sure my aunt will have a word with whoever didn’t see to have your almost son in law seated with you! And that nasty business at the door! Simply outrageous! I can assure you that's not how we want to treat members of your family’ she smiled again and Louis almost couldn’t contain his giggles. She’s going to make a great lawyer, all those lieds said with straight face from start to finish. 

In no time waiting stuff fixed Harry with a seat and Louis was seated between him and Eleanor talking enthusiastically and making plans to meet up while she was still in London. 

'So Louis! You and Eleanor seem to get on great!’ her mother asked from across the table.

'Your daughter is simply a delight Mrs. Calder. I'm sure we’ll be the best of friends’ Louis answered truthfully.

'Just friends?’ she asked with the tone of voice that your nan used to when she was asking about boys when you were in middle school. Louis looked dumbfounded between Harry and Eleanor and saw Lottie rolling her eyes. 

'I’m sorry Mrs. Calder perhaps we were a little too subtle. I make sure to change that.’ Harry said smiling sweetly but Louis could see the tension in his jaw and shoulders. 'I’m Louis’ boyfriend so I’m pretty sure just friends will have to do’ 

Everyone looked at Harry and Louis could also feel a surge of affection. maybe Harry was just a good actor, but tense shoulders and tight fists hidden under the table seemed more like an emotional reaction. And a possessive streak was something Louis always appreciated in a partner.

'Also I have a boyfriend' Eleanor interjected looking straight at her mother 'His name is Max, we’ve been dating for a long time now. He’s coming to London in few days. I’ll introduce you’ she said evenly but Louis could feel her voice shaking, he reached for her hand under the table and squeezed it tightly, she squeezed back and the corners of her mouth tilted upwards just a little bit.

'Oh dear! You never told us you were dating some gentleman! Is he from Harvard?’ her mom asked and Louis caressed her wrist softly to give her the courage

'No. He’s a model. Quite successful one. I’m sure you’ll love him’ 

The look of outrage on all four adults seated by the table was almost laughable. They all looked like cartoons characters. Noone spoke a word, young ones enjoying the olders distress and parents being literally speechless.

'Well look at us three’ Lottie noted sarcastically 'Combined together we make one perfect child. Lou’s got the dick I have perfect boyfriend and El’s got Harvard degree. We’re your wet dream, folks’ she said accenting every word and all five of them burst into fit of laughter after her words leaving adults even more speechless.

Good. The less they talked the better.


	6. Highs, lows and fifty thousand pounds.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back! And there's angst coming out of my ass. 
> 
> TRIGGER WARNING homophobic slurs, shitty parental behaviour. 
> 
> Enjoy babies!

Louis was sitting on the counter in the kitchen dangling his feet in the air, sipping tea and watching Grimmy who was incredibly chirpy at this time of the day.

'It’s not even 8 o’clock you can’t possibly be this happy before noon’ he said then eyeing his friend carefully.

'Why not?’ Nick asked with absent expression.

'Because we’re human. We’re destined to be lazy and sleep every chance we get, 8 o’clock is not a valid hour to be awake.’

'Well I’ve been awake for hours now' Grimmy answered with huge grin.

'Is Colton back?’ Louis asked carefully putting two and two together.

'Yes! He came back yesterday!’ Nick answered dreamily.

'Do I want to ask what you two been doing?’

'Oh I bet you do’ Nick sing songed wiggling his eyebrows obscenely.

'Ew Grimshaw don’t be gross’ Louis said scrunching his nose like he smelled something really bad.

'I didn’t even say anything!’ Grimmy exclaimed raising his hands up in the sign of defeat 'But I bet you would love to know huh?’ he murmured lowly, 'You would just love all the details of what I let Colton do to me’ he whispered with mischievous smile getting closer to Louis.

'You’re obscene and I’m going to file a harassment lawsuit against you’ Louis answered trying to contain his giggled.

'No you’re not. Because thinking of me and Colton turns you on’ Nick answered smiling slyly 'Doesn’t it baby? Just you and two big man towering over you’ he whispered barely able to contain his laugh moving towards Louis and stepping between his legs with his hips flushed to the counter.

'Yes! because you're such a manly type’ Louis mocked.

'I could. For such a cute little twink’ Nick snickered.

'I’m way too old to be a twink you perverted old fart’ Louis laughed loudly with Nick’s hands sneaking around his waist

'You don’t look a day over nineteen baby’ he mocked and held Louis’s face in both of his hands making obscene kissing sounds. Louis lost all of his cool and started to laugh hysterically which made Nick only double his efforts. He was on his way to fall from the counter from how hard he was laughing when his eyes caught someone standing by the door looking terrified, Louis’ demeanor changed instantly and he instinctively clutched onto Nick’s arm to keep him from moving away.

'Can I help you?’ he yelled in a demanding voice looking at his father’s pale face. Nick turned around and tried to step away from Louis since he saw a third person in a room but Louis didn’t let him. He held him tight exactly in the same place. He looked to Louis questioningly.

'Can I help you father?’ Louis asked again giving Grimmy a pointed look.

‘Hi! I'm Nick. I work with Louis’ Grimmy waved politely.

'You call this work?! You just let those old man grab you?! What kind of work place is it?! You're sexaully harrasing my teenage son! I will not stand for this! I’m a lawyer! I will sue this whole place!!’ seemed like Grimmy’s voice kicked Tony back into the motion, he was getting louder with every word and quite a few people stopped in the hall to listen.

'Could you not make a scene in my work place? Let’s talk outside’ Louis gritted through his teeth and jumped off the counter. 'I’m sorry’ he whispered to Grimmy and kissed his cheek.

'By the way I’m not even thirty yet!’ Grimmy yelled after them with a cheeky wink and Louis snorted loudly. It looked like his father wanted to stop once again but Louis just gripped his forearm and almost dragged him into the elevator. He pressed a button for a ground level and stepped out of the building.

'What are you doing here?’ he asked casually lighting up a cigarette once they were outside.

'I came by here to make sure for myself what kind of work this was! And I see I was not mistaken! If you think I’m going to let it go, you’re wrong!’ Tony exclaimed still red with rage.

'What are you gonna do?’ Louis asked smirking slightly and keeping his voice even. Having one over his father was glorious and seeing him squirm like that was giving Louis almost sadistic pleasure. 'You gonna sue someone? Threaten to fire someone? Cut me off?’ he chuckled mercilessly 'Face it daddy, you have no pull here' he ended with evil smile.

‘I will fire that man!’

'What kind of world are you even living in?’ Louis asked genuinely confused 'Noone knows who you are here and noone cares. This isn’t your firm where you can terrify everybody into obedience and it’s not your home when you can keep your kids hostage with threat of cutting us off. Nick happens to be a great friend of mine and incredible person, it’s way more than I can say about you. And you don’t get to come in here and make a scene in my workplace because despite what you may think the world does not bend to your wishes whenever you want it to. And you can’t make me stop being gay, you can’t make me quit this job or go to law school. You can’t make me do anything. So at least please, stop embarrassing me with your childish fits.’

'I’m embarrassing you?’ his dad exclaimed with emotionless laughter tinting his voice 'You’re embarrassing me. Ever since you were born you’ve been nothing but embarrassment and disappointment. I wish I never had a son If you turned out like this!’ he spat with the venom Louis never heard in his voice before and Louis took a step back like his father physically slapped him. He should have, would probably hurt less.

'Well I guess there's no need for us to see each other again If that’s how you feel. Goodbye Tony.’ Louis choked out and without a second turned on his heel and nearly run into the building. He walked through halls as fast as he could without drawing attention to himself until finally he found a broom closet at the end of the hall and he shut the door after himself.

His heart was beating rapidly and he had trouble with catching a breath. He placed a hand on his heart feeling it almost ripping out his chest and his brows furrowed in confusion. He had no idea why today of all days he had such a strong emotional reaction to his father. It's not like they’ve been rainbows and sunshine before. He heard all of that before. He knew all of that before. He knew they were the problem, he knew there was nothing wrong with him and there he was hiding in a fucking broom closet sitting on the floor with his head between his knees and his nails digging into his wrists trying to make panic attack go away. He tried to clear his head and think about what he knew was working in those situation. He took deep breath, and then another, and another until he could think again. He looked around and started to mutter under his breath list of things he was seeing in front of him. After few minutes he released a shaky breath and slumped down completely drained.  He rubbed his eyelids and tugged on his hair lightly just to make sure he was still here. Then the door went ajar and he could see Nick’s outline poking it’s head through the door.

'Can I?’ he asked softly ‘Jackie saw you going in here’.

'Make yourself at home’ Louis smiled softly. Nick stepped in and closed the door after himself and kneeled in front of Louis placing tentative hand on his knee.

'I really feel I should make a coming out of a closet joke right now’ he teased gently, and Louis snorted in response.

'It had to be made. We would hate ourselves otherwise’ Louis smiled. He really appreciate the fact that Grimmy could make him laugh even in the most unlaughable moments in his life.

'Are you okay?’

'Yeah. I’m okay. I just. I really need a drink’ Louis laughed.

'Well I have a show to do. And I know you have classes in few hours but how about you just ditch it and go home? We can call Harry up after and come by your place, I bring expensive stuff, my treat’ Nick smiled bumping his knee into Louis.

'Thanks Nick, I’ll definitely take you up on drinks, but I can go to classes, and I can still stay at work. I’m okay. I really am. Let’s just get out of here, walk out of the closet like a proud gay men we are and do the show yeah? It starts in minutes now. You should be sitting by the microphone by now’ Louis said standing up and slapping his ass to get rid of the dirt.

Grimmy looked like there was something more he wanted to say but he knew better than to push Louis into confessing.

The morning show, and all of Louis’ classes were just a blur. He did everything on automat, he talked to Harry in between classes, apparently Nick called him up and invited him over, he also apparently called Zayn and Niall which only resulted in Zayn acting like a worried mom begging him to come around the coffee shop he worked in for some good talk and hot chocolate and Niall being firm father demanding Louis came home right this instant and that he will leave work earlier to take care of him. Both were a definite no. The only thing he was glad about was that noone called Lottie up, because she would literally smolder him. He brushed off both Niall and Zayn, but Harry was kind of more difficult.

'Haz I’m fine.’ he repeated the hundredth time 'You’re overreacting.’

'it’s okay to not be fine you know that right? You don’t always have to be so bloody tough’ Harry's annoyed voice came through the speakers.

'I’m not being tough, I’m simply okay. This is hardly the first time my father is saying shit like that to me. There has to be a point where all of you stop freaking out’ he answered aiming for bored. And feeling his pockets to find keys to his apartment.

'Are you in front of your flat?’ Harry asked then.

'Yes, I can’t find my keys’ Louis complained.

'Give me a sec’ Harry said and the line went silent, but Louis didn't even had a minute to feel confused because the next second the door opened revealing Harry.

'Lottie let me in, she and Blake are out getting food.’ he explained smiled lightly 'Welcome home honey’ he smirked then petting dumbfounded Louis square on the mouth, and Louis did not think about how it would be to come home to this everyday. He did not think about how would it be to trade welcome kisses and good night kisses with Harry for real.

'Hi H’ he said after a beat with soft smile and walking into his apartment. He left his things near the door and threw himself on the couch.

'You want a cuddle?’ Harry asked innocently, and Louis just reached out his arms and let out an incoherent grunt. Harry dimpled and leaped in the couch next to Louis and picked him up easily placing him comfortably on his lap, sneaking one arm around his waist with the second one caressing his head. It was nice. He was kissing his head lightly once in awhile and was humming some melody under his breath so quietly that Louis couldn’t even make out what was it exactly. He could feel some of his nerves disappearing. He could still feel them throbbing just under his skin ready to overtake him again, but for now, just for a little bit laying in Harry’s arms was making it better. He could feel his arms loosing up and his eyelids drooping and before he knew it he was asleep.

He woke up to the loud crash coming from the kitchen and hushed voices in the kitchen. He could still feel Harry beside him so he kept his eyes closed to enjoy it just a little more knowing full well he will have to move once he’ll reveal he's awake.    
  
‘You don’t have to worry about him Harry’ he heard Lottie whisper ‘Like I said, we’re both used to it. We just have some fun and he’ll be alright. He’s going to be even better when they go back home’   
  
‘I know that I just barely met him, but it’s impossible to be okay after something like that! Lots he can’t just shake it off like that. I’m just… I’m really worried. He doesn’t deserve it, well no one deserves it.. But HE doesn’t. He is so… you know’ Harry finished awkwardly shifting a little and squeezing Louis closer.    
  
‘Yeah, I know’ Lottie said fondly at when Louis cracked his eyes open he could see his sister smiling softly, she must have felt his eyes on her because she smiled even wider ‘Well look who's back. Welcome sunshine.’   
  
‘Hi’ Louis croaked out forcing himself to sit up. ‘How long was I asleep?’ he asked turning to face Harry.   
  
‘Just a little bit. Two hours or something?’ Harry smiled and traded his fingers through Louis’ hair. ‘You messed up your hair’ he smiled.   
  
‘Figured’   
  
‘Hello doll!’ Grimmy exclaimed stepping into the room ‘I made you something strong, fruity and huge, just like you like your man’ he winked and  handed Louis a drink.   
  
‘What are you doing here Grim? Colton just came back you should be home.’ Louis said shaking his head.   
  
‘Oh pish posh, he’ll be fine, he went to see some friends he’ll pick me up later, don’ worry we’ll still have lots of sex’ Grimmy said messing up his hair.

‘Oh dear, such a relief’ Louis mocked sucking on a straw.   
  
‘Drinks for everyone!’ Niall yelled stepping into the room with the tray full of drinks followed by pink cheeked Zayn.    
  
‘Were you having sex in a kitchen again?’ Louis rolled his eyes just as Niall handed everyone a glass.   
  
‘Oh come on Lou, they wouldn’t have sex with all of us in here!’ Blake said.   
  
‘You know nothing.’ Louis answered with terror written all over his face ‘So did you?’ he turned to Niall.    
  
‘Depends what you consider sex’ Niall smirked.   
  
‘God you did not just blow him in the kitchen’ Louis growled.

‘I don’t kiss and tell’ Niall laughed but Zayn’s red face said it all.    
  
‘Since when?’ Louis muttered.   
  
‘Wait… but like Grimmy was with you like second ago!’ Blake interjected confused.   
  
‘When you know what you’re doing seconds are enough’ Harry smirked.   
  
‘Seconds, really? And you think it’s a good thing?’ Louis whispered into Harry’s ear.   
  
‘I just need a second but it doesn’t mean I can’t go for hours’ Harry whispered back with his lips grazing the shell of Louis ear and going down his neck.   
  
‘Also they were touching inappropriately when I was still there, don’t think I didn’t notice’ Grimmy deadpanned.

‘You’re animals’ Lottie concluded.

'Well it’s not our fault that you straights are jealous of our healthy sex life’ Niall said looking smug as fuck and grabbing Zayn forcefully and planting a kiss square on his mouth.

'I wouldn’t call having sex in the kitchen healthy’ Blake deadpanned 'no, like REALLY it has to be some health code violation’ he mused.

'Probably but they’ve been living with me for years now, strong antiseptics are my best friends’ Louis laughed.

'Like you’re a saint!’ Grimmy laughed.

'Exactly! Thank you Nicolas!’ Zayn yelled still blushing getting frustrated with the whole conversation. 'We caught you fucking on this couch more times that we can count’

'shh! Not in front of my baby sister!’ Louis exclaimed making whole show of standing up and covering Lottie’s ears.

'Like I haven’t seen you in making out with blokes on a dancefloor hundred times’ she replied rolling her eyes.

'exactly! You’re even worse than we are!’ Niall laughed.

'Is that right?’ Harry asked smirking 'Do tell!’

'Well once we came back home and we tried to open the front door but it just wouldn’t budge, turns out Louis was having sex against it with some bloke he picked up in the coffee shop. They were like really going at it cause they didn’t even hear us trying to get in! Louis is loud as fuck’ Niall chirped in happily.

'You did not just told the coffee shop bloke story!’ Louis exclaimed outraged.

'Oh he did! And we have more' Zayn said wiggling his eyebrows.

'You wouldn’t dare!’ Louis yelled.

'Okay once we came back home and the whole living room was smeared in food, like I’m telling you all of it, like walls, curtains, every inch of space, with like cakes and cupcake frosting, and in the middle of that was some bloke eating ice cream off Lou’s dick. It was fucking priceless!’ Niall roared and everyone giggled along with him.

'Too much visuals’ Lottie said scrunching her face.

'I think like I should be jealous over here.’ Harry said with lopsided smile 'I mean I am your boyfriend and I didn’t get neither your dick nor ice cream’

‘You think I'm giving it out like that?’ Louis asked tilting his head to the side 'You need to earn it.’

'Oh I plan to’ Harry sing songed with smug expression sucking on a straw rather suggestively.

It’s fair to say that after few drinks the conversation just went straight to the gutter, somewhere along the way someone suggested that the best way to cheer Louis up would be a strip tease, so that’s how he found himself sitting on the huge chair in the middle of the room with Harry stradling his lap and doing a body roll. He had to admit for a person who had trouble walking a straight line without tripping over he had a great coordination when it came to rubbing someone's dick over every single one of his body parts. Louis was pretty fucking sure he will suffocate or blow up. Niall was laughing hysterically seeing Louis’ expression, even Zayn was giggling at the sight. Lottie was hiding in Blake's arms claiming that there were things younger sisters just didn't need to know, Blake was cat calling and yelling things like 'Get it Styles!’ 'Nice one!’ and 'Show him who’s the boss!’ which was slightly disturbing and the only person who cared even a little bit about Louis well being was Grimmy who was always providing him with new alcohol to drink. He sat next to them and put the straw in Louis’ mouth every few seconds, because he could see that Louis’ hands were way too occupied with Harry’s hips.

Either way it was a great party, Louis was confident that all of them were going to regret it the next morning since it was a weekday and everyone except Lottie and Blake needed to go to work or uni a day after, but for now they were way too drunk too care and Louis was thankful for that, because a little bit of distraction was all he needed.

Halfway through Harry's dance, when all he was doing really was just grinding down on Louis and giggling like a maniac into Louis's neck the doorbell rang.

'Oh it’s probably Colton!’ Grimmy yelled running to the door and nearly tripping over his feet. Suddenly there was a silence in the room, and even Harry looked over Louis's shoulder and his expression turned stone cold. Louis craned his neck around and saw Grimmy with his hand still on the doorknob and at the door was noone else but he’s father.

'Oh for the love of God!’ Louis slurred standing up and placing Harry safely on the floor 'Two unexpected visits in one day? I know we don’t call each other often but surely you still know how to use a fucking cell phone?’ he asked annoyed.

'What are you doing here?! What is this?! In my father’s apartment? he’s rolling around in his grave now seeing what you fags are doing to his place! I came here to offer you my forgiveness! Your mother persuade me! But that’s it! That’s final! You don't want to have a normal life that’s your business, we’ve been trying to save you long enough but I’m done now! You think you’re going to continue with this sin and fund it with my money?!’

'Good! Just get the fuck out! Grandma left this apartment to me for a fucking reason! And you can choke on your fucking money! If I never see you it will be one day too soon!! Get out!’ Louis yelled getting as red on his face as his father 'Get the fuck out of my apartment!!’ Louis roared so loud that everyone cringed when his father was just standing there stunned.

'you heard him, dad. You should go.’ Lottie said standing up and placing a hand on Louis’ shoulder 'And it’s really fucking funny how you think grandpa would hate this when he..’ she said with vindictive smile but Louis stopped her

'No Lots. Don’t. He doesn’t deserve to know that' Louis said quietly. 'What more do you want?’ he asked turning to look at his father again. ‘Keys to the house I’ve not been in for years? Of course! Here’ he added walking to the door and searching for them in the bowl by the door 'Credit card you gave me for emergencies?’ he asked then reaching to his bag that was still lying in the corner and taking out his wallet 'Here, I never took a fucking pound of it.’ he said pushing it into his father’s stunned arms. 'Now we have nothing in common anymore, just like you always wanted’

'you still have my daughter here’ Tony hissed lowly 'Charlotte, Blake, pack your things we’re going back.’

'You go back. We’re staying. We’ll go straight back to school in few days’ Lottie said. 'Just go dad. It’s enough’ she said with tired face.

‘Fine. Maybe you can talk some sense into him.’ his dad said shaking his head. 'Just want you to know…’ he started turning around in the door with sadness on his face Louis never saw 'that If you ever decide to stop, and be our son again, live normal life, find a wife, we’ll be happy to have you back. But I am your father I need to do what's best for you, and I believe it’s time for some tough love, maybe it’ll be a wake up call’

'That’s the thing Tony. I’m not the one who needs a wake up call’ Louis said barely holding back the tears. His dad just nodded his head and when he turned around his shoulder slumped down and he looked decades older.

When the door closed behind him the silence in the room was piercing ears. Louis swallowed loudly and plastered on his face the most fake smile he could ever conjure.

'Well that’s a relief. Those games were getting tiring. Now let’s drink!’ he exclaimed grabbing a glass and downing a cocktail in one go.

'Lou…’ Lottie started

'Lots can we just not?’ he asked with pleading eyes 'Is anyone really surprised? I’m not. It was a long time coming. I knew they’ll do this sooner or later. Why do you think I’ll asked Harry for help? I just tried to get them there faster, put this sad excuse of relationship out of it’s misery. It’s fine it’s done. I have enough savings to survive for few weeks until I get the job at the radio or I’ll find some part time paid job somewhere.’ he said shrugging and willing his body not to shake.

'Or we can just start paying rent’ Zayn said with soft smile.

'Absolutely not!’ Louis answered without missing a beat

'Lou, stop. We can pay rent. You won’t have time to get a paid job with radio and uni. So don’t be an idiot, we won’t be living here for free anymore while you kill yourself trying to support yourself. Paying rent is normal.’ Niall said with the voice that suggested that it’s better to not fight with him.

'Let’s just talk about it tomorrow yeah? Come on people I believe my lap dance wasn’t over yet’ Louis smiled weakly praying that they would just take it and go with it.

'He’s right. Let’s do it! Our father would get a heart attack If he seen it' Lottie laughed

'I believe he already seen some of it' Blake snorted.

And somehow conversation turned to normal, Louis laughed and drank and cuddled with Harry, and everyone was laughing and drinking and slowly everyone went home. Lottie and Blake were asleep on the couch, Colton came to pick up Grimmy and they both left quickly, Niall and Zayn were already in their room and Louis stood on the balcony smoking a cigarette, leaning on the railing with Harry next to him.

'You want to stay over?’ Louis asked after a second.

'I have classes tomorrow but I don’t have it in me to go home. Will you lend me some clothes?’

'Don’t I always?’ Louis mused.

Harry turned around and bumped his shoulder against Louis.

'so now when everyone is gone. Can you stop with this whole act?’ he asked then piercing Louis with his green eyes.

'What act?’ Louis said knowing full well Harry won’t take his bullshit for long, but hey, you can’t blame the man for trying.

'your 'I’m fine I know it was coming’ act. Don’t get me wrong. You’re good! They might have even bought it. I think that all of your friends and Lottie, they like… they got used to it. To you always pretending that it’s okay that somehow along the way they believed you. And I don’t think that they know how much to this day it fucks you up’

'Well having everyone worried about me and babying me won’t change shit’ Louis shrugged.

'I think you need it. I know you’re strong, everyone knows you’re strong and I understand that you always want to take care of yourself, but everyone needs to be taken care of from time to time.’

'I’m fine, Harry' Louis sighed putting out his cigarette.

'No you’re not!’ Harry exclaimed 'God, baby just look at you!’ he stepped beside him and put his arms around his waist 'You’re so tense, and how could you not? It was traumatic Lou, what just happened, you need to work through it you need to give yourself a little time to be sad, a little to get used to this new situation.’ Louis sagged against him and inhale his smell 'Do you have work tomorrow?’ Harry asked suddenly.

'No. Just uni’ Louis answered, his words muffled by the fabric of Harry’s shirt.

'when do you get off?’

'I’m too drained to even make a get off joke’ Louis said 'Around 2 pm?’

'Good. I'll pick you up, and then it will be the whole day of me taking care of you. And you’re going to do whatever I say, eat whatever I give you and you will not complain even for a second. Is that understood?’ Harry asked.

'yes.’ Louis grumbled secretly pleased.

Maybe Harry was right. Maybe he needed some time to just let himself be babied, it wasn’t like he had any time in his life to be a baby. His parents even before his coming out were never ideal, they were never supportive and Louis was only there to be shown around as the ‘heir of the kingdom’. Perfect little boy for perfect proud parents.

Maybe he was right because when he woke up to Harry kissing his cheek and whispering that he has to go to classes, Louis did not feel good. He only caught a glimpse of Harry wearing Louis’ too short jeans and to tight T-shirt going out of the door, and he barely had a strength to go to his own classes. Thankfully he didn’t have to go to radio. He did feel a little bit guilty about not looking for a job right off the bat but decided that maybe Harry was right and world won’t stop turning If he’ll take a day off.

He had just three classes that day but he was still hungover and pretty tired with the emotional rollercoaster, he was sitting on the curb smoking a cigarette and waiting for Harry. The sun was shining in his face and he forgot his sunglasses so his head was absolutely killing him. Finally after few minutes Harry arrived.

'Hi Lou. Here take this’ he said immediately when Louis stepped into the car giving him a bottle of water and a painkiller.

'You’re an angel’ Louis moaned swallowing the pill and letting his head fall against the window. He closed his eyes hoping that it will start working by the time they get to his flat. When they were looking for a place to park a car his headache went away but he just noticed that for a day that Harry promised him, he was inexplicably quiet.

'Hey, what's up? Why are you being so quiet?’ he asked looking at him curiously

'I’m not. You have a headache I didn’t want to make it worse’ Harry shrugged, but oh boy was he the worst liar on the planet.

'Bullshit’ Louis called confidently 'Tell me what really happened’

'Let’s just go in, okay? I need to tell you this either way’ Harry sighed.

They walked up the stairs and found the apartment empty. Louis could swear that he was not able to handle that much stress those past few days. He was running on fumes already and now Harry was making him even more anxious.

'There’s really not an easy way to say it, but well today your father was waiting for me when I got to my classes. He offered me money to leave you alone' Harry said blushing heavily and Louis felt air punched out of his lungs.

This conversation... he had it before. It was starting to turn into horrible deja vu, or his worst nightmare and he just wanted to wake up. But no matter how many times he pinched his forearm, Harry was still in front of him with guilt written all over his face.

'So how much did he offer you?’ Louis choked out and cleared his throat right after, hating how weak his voice sounded.

'I didn’t ask. I didn’t even look at the cheque, but.. he came by my apartment, Liam was home, he thought it was something for work so he took it.’ Harry said taking out the envelope and giving it to Louis. He took out the piece of paper with shaky hands and his eyes bulged out.

'Fifty thousand pounds? Well you have to give it to him, he’s not cheap’ he mocked his voice turning icy cold. He couldn’t blame Harry for taking the money but boy did it hurt. He didn't remember it hurting this much last time.

'I just figured I should tell you. I don’t know If you want to talk to him, give this back or destroy it, but like I can drive you to him if you like? Or we can talk to him together, make sure he knows that fifty thousand, yeah it’s a lot but it’s kind of a funny amount of money comparing to you’ Harry said playing nervously with his fingers and Louis looked up confused with his heart fluttering a bit.

'Wait. You don’t want it?’ he asked shyly

'Of course not!’ Harry exclaimed with a pure outraged written all over his face 'I told you before, no amount of money would make me go away. Not just because it goes against everything I believe in, but also because you… you’re worth so much more. You’re such a wonderful person Lou. I would never do that to you’ Harry said grabbing Louis’ hand like touch would make him understand. 'You really thought I would do it?’

'I’m sorry’ Louis admitted guiltily 'I should have known better. Just, last time, I had the same conversation and it not ended this way’

'I know. It’s okay Lou’ Harry said smiling lightly. 'You want to go see him?’ he asked after a beat has passed.

Louis took a deep breath and thought about going there again, hear more offensive and hurtful things from his parents, yelling at them again, hearing that he’s not their son anymore again, and he just hadn't had it in him to go in circles like that. It was enough. Sometimes you just had to stop. Some relationships were meant to be let go of. Sucks that this one was with his parents, but how could he have a relationship with them when they refused to acknowledge such a huge part of his life? And not just his life, they refused to acknowledge the basic human rights for huge group of people all around the world. As long as they refused to learn he didn’t want to have anything to do with them. It wasn’t going to be easy, but in a long run it will be much healthier.

'No’ Louis smiled 'I’m truly done.’ he took the cheque out of Harry’s hands and tore it in little pieces. 'There’ he smiled wider looking at the pile of paper lying on the couch between them. 'So… I was promised the day of fun, we’re going to have some fun or just more angst?’ he asked with lopsided smile. Harry answered him with dimples in full force.

  
'All fun. Just you wait.’ 


	7. Kermit, Bubbles and childhood demons.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back and it's getting INTENSE for a second there :) hope you enjoy :D 
> 
> Anywho!
> 
> TRIGGER WARNINGS: depression, bullying, discrimination against pansexual people even within community.
> 
> Also I've got some news! I have got myself a beta! So now I feel like a proper fic writer, so thank you Fleur for working with me on this one! xx.

'Okay you were right. This is without doubt the best burger I’ve ever ate,’ Louis moaned clapping his tummy. 'Jesus I can’t believe you let me eat two,’ he added looking at Harry in disbelief.

'Well saying no to you would defeat the purpose of having fun,’ Harry said munching on his veggie burger.

'You know what else defeats purpose of fun?’ he asked pausing to add some dramatic effect.  ‘Veggie burger.’ he smirked leaning in.

'Don’t mock me just because I want to stay healthy!’ Harry said with slight offence in his voice.

'I don’t mock you because you want to stay healthy I mock you because you want to stay hipstery, meat is actually good for you' Louis laughed flicking Harry’s nose.

'I do eat meat’ Harry said wiggling his eyebrows.

'Oh god you did not just make that joke’ Louis groaned.

'Oh I did. Get ready baby I intend to make a lot of jokes today,' Harry said giggling.

They were sitting in the small burger joint at the outskirts of town, when Harry brought him here Louis was more than skeptical since it looked extremely unsanitary and just plain dirty. But Harry insisted that their food was heaven so Louis decided to trust him. It didn’t mean of course that he stopped frowning, pulling faces and threatening Harry with bodily harm if anything should happen to him, for the whole forty minutes it took them until their food was ready. The first bite shut him right up.

‘Well now that I fed you’ Harry said wiping his hands ‘let’s go. We have a lot of things to do.’

‘Which are?’ Louis asked reaching for his wallet, but Harry stopped him and left few bills on the table.

‘Which are a surprise.’ Harry smiled taking Louis by the hand and pulling him out of the burger place. He didn’t let go when they stepped outside, and Louis looked at their joint hands through his eyelashes. Harry’s was so much bigger engulfing Louis’ smaller one, nearly swallowing it whole.

‘After you sir’ Harry giggled opening the car door for Louis.

He started the engine and backed out of parking spot. Louis was flipping through radio stations until he found Radio 1 and leaned back satisfied.

'Always faithful to the brand, eh?’ Harry smiled.

'Well it is obviously the best radio station ever.’ Louis smiled 'I always wanted to work there. Ever since I was still at highschool trying to sneak around with my boyfriend so my parents won’t catch us, terrified that they will, and I heard Grimmy for the first time on air. And I thought he was funny, I loved his show, was always listening to it on the way to school, I knew nothing about him but he said something on air that made me think he was gay, I mean obviously he was out but I didn’t know about it. So when I came home I googled him and I don’t know I guess he was my first gay role model, because he was out and he was still successful in what he was doing. Please never tell him that but I looked up to him for such a long time. I even had a little crush on him at the beginning’ Louis laughed at the memories.

'My lips are sealed.’ Harry smiled 'With your boyfriend. The same one that...um…’

'My dad paid off?’ Louis finished bluntly 'Yes. God. I haven’t thought about him for years and now he’s fucking everywhere.’

'It’s done Lou. You just need to put your ghosts to bed and that’s that. I know it’s not that easy but… ‘ Harry said gripping the steering wheel tightly ‘...they do love you. Your parents. They love you so much. They genuinely think that this is the best for you. I’m not saying that it justifies their behaviour in any way, but… it has to be some kind of consolation, right? That they truly love you. In their own fucked up way.’

'Frankly? It’s not. I wished they hated me. I wished they would throw me out of the house after I came out to them and never spoke to me again. It would be so fucking easier. Why do you think it took me so long to just cut them off? Because I know that they love me and despite everything? I love them too, and nothing was more terrifying to me than disappointing them.’ Louis said with his face hardening with every word and Harry almost regretted asking.

He shouldn't have brought it up. It was supposed to be a day for Louis to get away from everything, he could deal with the aftermath tomorrow, and then Harry had to go and open his huge mouth. God he was so stupid. He tried to whack his head around any topic he could come up with to end the awkward silence in the car when Louis spoke again.

'Do you have any idea how it is to be literally stuck?’ he asked with his voice raised, emotions filling his chest. ‘I was stuck for years between what my parents wanted from me and who I was and I couldn’t go an inch in any direction because it meant either betraying them or betraying myself. And I know I have no right to complain, I was brought up in wealth I had everything I wanted, I didn’t have trouble with paying for college for a flat, food, but they treated me for years like I was their employee. Like we signed some kind of a contract that stated that they are paying for me and I have to do what they say. And If I break that contract they can take everything away. That’s not what love is.’

'Lou, you shouldn’t compare your suffering to others people suffering. Just because someone had 'worse’ in your opinion doesn’t mean you have no right to feel hurt. Unfortunately there’s enough pain to go around.’ Harry said squeezing Louis’ hand quickly.

'I know. Technically I know that, it doesn’t mean I still don’t feel like shit every time I complain, thinking of all those kids who have been beaten up because of their sexual orientation, or send to fucking conversion camps. I got off easy compared to that. And now I feel like I’m playing martyr just saying that and I’m not, I just… Jesus it’s so frustrating’

'Baby I know, I know you’re not saying that to play martyr. And I get it, in a way I had the same.’ Harry said parking the car 'We’re here’ he said then cutting off Louis’ question about how did he had the same.

'Did you just drove me to the amusement park?’ Louis deadpanned.

'Yes. Now put the smile on that gorgeous face and let me win you some plushie’ Harry said stepping out.

It was a small park with maybe five attraction tops but it meant it was nearly deserted, and they didn’t have to stand in long lines to get to them. Louis quite enjoyed Harry holding onto his hand like he was holding onto his dear life, and hiding under his arm when they were riding fast and high. After the third ride on the same rollercoaster that Louis only took because he wanted to see how far Harry was willing to take this Harry was pale as paper and Louis felt guilty about pushing him to go that many times.

'H are you okay?’ Louis asked worried sitting him on a bench his back to the rollercoaster so he wouldn’t see how fast it was moving.

'yes, yes, I’m fine, I’m just not the biggest fan of heights’ Harry laughed shaking his head his curls jumping around his face.

'I’m sorry, we shouldn’t have gone so many times’ Louis said then feeling guilty as hell.

'Lou babe, I’m not from porcelain I won’t broke. I had fun. I’m the one who brought you here remember?’ he smiled then tilting his head to one side.

'But I made you go to that rollercoaster three times’ Louis said looking down.

'Oh honey’ Harry cooed 'Do you really think you can make me do anything I don’t want to do?’ he added with a raised eyebrow and visible smirk.

'I bet I could.’ Louis murmured getting on with the program rather fast.

'I’d like to see you try’ Harry sing songed standing up 'Come on! I promised you a plushie!’ he exclaimed tugging onto Louis’ hand.

The moved to the stall with various items hanging around the walls and shooting range in the middle. Behind it sat an older man reading newspaper. He smiled widely when they approach him.

'Hello boys! Want to win something?’ he asked

'Yes! I promised him a plushie! Lou which one do you want?’ Harry asked excited.

Louis looked around and finally he set his eyes on the green one in the corner. The devilish smile took over his face.

'Kermit please.’ he giggled 'It reminds me of you’ he cooed and laughed out loud at the look of sheer outrage on Harry’s face.

'I do not look like a frog!’ Harry whispered-yelled.

'Eh you do a little bit. The prettiest frog in all lands’ Louis smiled fondly tugging onto Harry’s curl.

'Guess who’s not getting any tonight’ Harry sing songed and turned around to the older man to see him smiling at them fondly.

'You’re a lovely couple!’ he said 'My daughter is gay! Her wife is a wonderful lady!’ he said then in hushed tone like they were in on some secret.

Louis just open his mouth to deny them being a couple but Harry beat him to it.

'Thank you sir! And all the best to your daughter and your daughter in law’ he said politely squeezing Louis’ waist. 'How well I have to do to get Kermit the frog?’ he asked.

‘30 points! you have 3 shots. Do you know how to operate the gun?’ after the quick instruction Harry leaned onto the counter with his face focused on the target at hand with his eyebrows scrunched up in concentration and his tongue peeking out from his mouth. He ended up scoring only 10 and was pouting heavily with Louis laughing and assuring him that he will really live without Kermit the frog plushie when the guy handed him the frog.

'Consolation prize?’ he smiled.

'Really?’ Harry asked his eyes going wide.

'Sure you seem like great kids.’ the guy shrugged.

'Oh my God! Thank you sir!’ Harry exclaimed and shoved the frog into Louis’ arms 'See?! I told you I win you a plushie!’

'My hero!’ Louis laughed with one hand on his chest.

Harry started to say goodbye to the man but Louis stopped him, saying that he wants to win him something too. He lined up his shot and ended up scoring three bullseyes.

'That’s how it’s done baby’ he said puffing his chest out 'Now which one do you want?’ the devious smirk spread on Harry’s face.

'Bubbles. She’s blonde, small and viscous. Just like you’ he said accenting every word and Louis choked on his breath from pure outrage.

'I am not small!’ he yelled promoting both Harry and older man to burst with laughter.    


'Sure you're not love’ Harry cooed patting him on the hand and after saying goodbye to the man he took still too outraged to speak Louis by his waist and led him towards ice cream booth.

'I will not let it go so easily!’ Louis warned with his fist in the air.

'Whatcha gonna do kitten?’ Harry asked laughter tinting his voice.

'You're an ass’ Louis murmured secretly pleased at being called kitten. So he liked being called cute things. Sue him. He did not blush. Shut up.

Harry bought them both outrageous amount of ice cream swearing that they needed to feed Kermit and Bubbles. They sat on the bench and ate ice cream in silence.

'What did you mean when you said you had the same?’ Louis asked after awhile, remembering their earlier conversation.

Harry looked over at him and sighed while turning his body to face Louis, he munched on ice cream a while longer with thoughtful expression before finally speaking.

'As you know I’m pansexual. Which means, among other things, that sometimes I am in a “hetero relationship”’ Harry said making quotation marks with his fingers ‘And sometimes I have to hear from people from my own community that I’m only a part of it if I’m currently in “not straight” relationship. And that somehow I don’t belong if I’m dating a girl. I’m not straight enough for straights and I’m not queer enough for lgbtq+ community. Which means I get my fair share of shit from both sides. And sometimes I hear a gay friend of mine yelling that I have no right to claim to be a part of this community since 'sometimes I’m straight’ and if I didn’t go through all the shit they’ve been through I have no right. And I think .. well you do have a point right? I think that yes, I had it way easier. But then again why the amount of suffering should be some kind of a ticket to acceptance? Why we have to raise each other who suffered more? Shouldn’t we celebrate every time that someone from our community can have experience that is completely drama free? Doesn’t this mean that we’re going in the right direction and that there’s a hope that one day world will be like that to all of us? At least that’s what I was thinking.’ Harry shrugged with his arms. ‘But for the longest time when I came out to someone from my own community I had to basically roll out my credentials. Show us all the boys you slept with so we believe you’re not straight! Show us the signed affidavits from people that fall out of the primitive vision on gender cause only boys and girls make you bi not pan! They made me feel like I had to proove my sexuality like it wasn’t something I felt, but all the people I did. And there were so many people having all those opinions about my sexuality and there is no one right way to be pan. I don’t have to fucking try one of each to know how I feel. To know what attracts me to a person and knowing it’s not their gender. And I know not all pan people have it like that but I have it like that. And I chose my own label just like everyone is welcome to do. So in a way it was similar because it was pissing me off so much but I felt like I couldn’t complain because they had worse. Because my friend couldn’t hold his boyfriend’s hand in highschool and up until that point I was only dating girls. They had worse so I should shut up and take it’

'I’m sorry H. And it’s bullshit, for people who had straights dictating them who they should love to do the same to you is bullshit. Everyone should be welcome here, everyone is welcome for me’ Louis said squeezing Harry’s hand lightly.

'God that got heavy quick’ Harry laughed softly ducking his head down. 'Let’s move before I suck all the fun out of the room’ he added half serious.

'You’re doing no such thing.’ Louis said with maybe too much seriousness than necessary. 'I always have fun with you. When we talk shit, or drink our asses off or when we talk about serious stuff. It doesn’t mean I don’t have fun just because it’s not silly and light.’ he said holding Harry’s wrist lightly.

'But I was suppose to take your mind of off your problems not bombard you with mine’ Harry said turning his hand around to lace his fingers with Louis’.

'No, you were suppose to make me feel better. Which you do. Everytime I so much as hear your name’ Louis whispered blushing a little 'You have no idea how frustrating watching Harry Potter has become, everytime they say 'Harry’ I’m sitting there grinning like a maniac.’ he added giggling.

'Oh my God that was a terrible joke!’ Harry choked out after huge fit of laughter.

'You should know you’re the expert’ Louis giggled along.

'You’re hanging out with me way too much, I’m rubbing off on you’

'I think I would remember If we ever did some rubbing’ Louis said suggestively.

'Well who knows baby, the night is still young and just so happens the next stop is your house and then PARTY!’ Harry exclaimed throwing his hands up.

'You do realise it’s a school night right? And that we have work and uni tomorrow?’ Louis asked fondly knowing full well he won’t be able to say no to him. It seems like in a land very far away he had some rules and morales, now though the only rule he had was 'never say no to Harry'. Whatever the boy wants- goes.

'Well no one said we actually have to show up tomorrow’ Harry said with mischievous glance.

'Curls, what did you do?’ Louis asked getting suspicious.

'I may have called Grimmy and tell him that there is a possibility of you not showing up to work tomorrow. And like he won’t tell anyone else until you actually won’t show up. And then he’ll tell them that you got sick and went to doctor’s straight after work today, but still it’s up to you, like If you still want to go you can and like I hope I didn’t cross any lines I just…’ Harry was talking nervously, spitting nearly hundred words per minute.

“H! H! It’s okay’ Louis laughed interrupting him 'It’s fine, you didn’t cross a line it’s all good. Thank you even, for assuring me an option to not go to work tomorrow. I never do those things but I guess there has to be a first time when I flake on my job because of my hangover'.

'You’re way too proper’ Harry said with faux disapproval. 'I should mess you up a little’ he added smirking.

'Promises promises’ Louis smiled.

When they arrived to Louis’ apartment the met with Lottie and Blake and decided to take them with them since they were leaving the following day, and Harry felt already like he’s taken too much from sibling bonding time and Zayn and Niall decided to tag along too because wherever there was a party there was Niall.

Harry even scooped Blake on the way to the club to make sure Lottie and Louis will have time to talk, and tried to reason with himself that he had no monopoly on Louis and that they were leaving so Harry can just hang out with him tomorrow since they're living in the same town, so he should let him be with Lottie. Yes, that was an adult thing to do, and he's definitely not going to be like sad or disappointed that he doesn’t have Louis’ constant attention. He was not a child thank you very much. He could share. It was no biggie.

'Jesus you look miserable’ he heard someone laughing into his ear when he was sulking in the corner sipping his drink 'Pouting that I took your Lou away?’ Lottie asked plopping down next to him.

'What?! No!’ Harry yelled too aggressively for it to be anywhere near believable, Lottie laughed shaking her head.

'It’s fine Harry. I’m sure he’d rather spend time with you. Not that he’ll tell me that! But we’ve had almost twenty years to get sick of each other, so I appreciate you trying to give us some alone time but now you should go get your boy’ she said ruffling his hair.

'Um.. you sure? You are leaving tomorrow.’ Harry said already halfway up from his chair.

'I’ll be back in few weeks, or he’s going to visit me. We see each other plenty, really’ she smiled shooing him away.

Harry stumbled onto the dancefloor where Louis was dancing with Blake. Zayn and Niall were next to them performing something that could only be called kamasutra with clothes on. Honestly, the amount of grinding and touching was way too obscene for public place. But like always they had zero fucks to give. Harry bounced up next to Louis who lit up at the sight of him and pulled him by his neck. Blake yelled something that none of them heard and went probably to find Lottie.

Louis had his hands on Harry's neck and the other boy pulled him closer by his waist, Louis was doing some energetic routine which involved stopping from one leg to another with the sway of hips and some body rolls but Harry really couldn’t keep up, so he just stood there swaying holding Louis and letting him dancing circles around him. Truth be told he could do way better than that, he was marvelous dancer after few drinks but this time Louis was looking right into his eyes and with every turn and with every body roll and with every subtle touch he was never taking his eyes off of Harry’s. It should be weird, but somehow it wasn’t. Both of them knew the moment was way too intense for the kind of relationship they had but none of them spoke a word about it. They just danced.

Nothing special was happening, the night was filled with sweat, cigarette smoke, taste of alcohol and usual bickering between all of them but somehow it felt almost monumental. To Louis everything was happening in the slow motion, like his head was underwater and every sound was coming to him a little altered. It was a weird mix of anxiety and anticipation.

Then after Lottie and Blake went home, followed by Zayn and Niall, when him and Harry were sitting on the hill overlooking the city everything stopped. It was quiet, the only sound coming from the city below them and still ringing in their ears from the club.

'We must have walked a thousand miles today' Louis sighed taking off his shoes and massaging his feet.

'And I would walk five hundred miles…’ Harry hummed softly smiling.

'It was a great day Harry.’ Louis said quietly 'Thank you’

'You’re welcome Lou. I just wish I could make everything better’

'Well you can’t. It's my parents, my mess. It’s mine to clean up. I’m the only one who can help me’ Louis said wistfully looking over the horizon where the sky started to light up.

'and you will. You’re so strong Lou.’ Harry said promoting the burst of laughter from Louis that rippled through the quiet night making Harry jump.

'I’m really really not.’ Louis laughed 'I’m just stubborn. And proud. I hate when people see me weak so I just hide from them. That doesn’t mean I’m not weak it’s just means I’m a coward. When I was still in highschool I was really depressed, but I was so good at hiding it that even Zayn noticed only after a year. Zayn! My best friend! The person who can tell my mood by looking at my face.’

'Just because you don’t want people to see you when you’re sad doesn’t mean you’re weak. Of course I think you should have searched for help earlier but everyone needs to do what they want in their own time.’ Harry said softly taking out cigarettes and handing one to Louis.

'The funny thing is my parents saw it. I mean they saw the signs it was way harder to pretend at home. They saw that during the weekends I was laying in the same exact place for three days watching movies. That I gained a lot of weight from just sitting at home all the time, giving my friends excuses like 'I have family thing’ and shit like that. Going out with them just enough for them not to get suspicious, and I mean when I was already there things were great, I could smile and have a fucking time of my life. But then I’ll come home and it’s everything hitting me all at once again. Suddenly answering texts was the most difficult thing I could have think of because I just wanted all of them to leave me alone. Not to mention lying in bed and screaming at myself for hours to just get up, and still not being able to. I was crying for stupid reasons or without reason at all just because and I was just… i didn't know what was happening. Didn’t know how to fix it or what I wanted. Basically every question in my life could have been answered with I don’t know. I mean, how do you not notice that your kid gained over twenty pounds in just a couple of weeks? How do you not notice that his teeth started to break because he is too depressed to maintain even basic cleaning rituals? And the only thing they did was just yelling at me for being lazy. God when I look back at it now…’ Louis shook his head ‘... I was so fucking scared.’

'Scared of what?’ Harry asked barely above whisper, not wanting to startle Louis.

'Scared that I’m going to fail, scared that I’m not going to do what I want in my life, scared that I’m going to fail my parents If I tell them or that I’m going to fail myself If I don’t. Scared of what I was feeling. Scared because that one time when I saw some post on tumblr about suicide I thought “I couldn’t have done that, my parents would blame themselves I wouldn’t want that for them”. I didn’t think that I want to live, I thought that my suicide would be an inconvenience to my parents. How fucked up is this?’ Louis said looking at Harry with wide eyes.

'Still it kept you here. Whatever it was that did. I’m glad it kept you here' Harry said placing a tentative hand on Louis’ waist, who moved closer to the other boy.

'It’s not like I had suicidal thoughts. I didn’t. It thankfully never got that bad for me. I just thought that I can’t have suicidal thoughts because it would disappoint my parents. Which is… which is fucked up on so many levels I don’t even know where to begin. The very thing that was destroying me from the start was also keeping me alive and if that's not the royal level of irony I don't know what is’ Louis said with humourless laugh.

'But it got better? You're better now?’ Harry asked with his voice choked with tears he was holding back.

'Like I said it took Zayn a year to catch on. I was always replying to him, since he was the person that was annoying me the least, we would still go out cause I knew that if I want to hide it I need to hide it from him, I was playing the role of my life he had no idea anything was going on. We were seeing each other less often but he didn’t think much of it, with me hiding behind my parents and them being nagging assholes. Finally Lottie told him.’ Louis said rubbing his hands over his eyes, and Harry held his breath 'I can’t believe I did that to her. She was way too little to understand completely what was going on but she did live with me, and she saw how I was and one day after school she went to Zayn's house and told him that I was sad. And she doesn’t know why but I’m always sad and she tried to make me happy but I don’t even smile. And that’s when Zayn started to pay closer attention. And well I wanted to hide it but not because I actually wanted to hide it, I just wanted to see how long it will take for someone to notice. So when he did notice it came pouring out of me. He tried talking my parents into paying for psychologist. But you met them, you know how lovely there are, they decided that I just need to 'get it together’ and doctor is not necessary. Thanks for your professional opinion mom, never knew you majored in psychology’ Louis snorted bitterly 'So he finally found and lgbtq center two towns away with free therapy for kids whose parents couldn't afford or refused to pay for therapy. Every two weeks he was coming to my house, practically forcing me into the shower and clothes, driving me there, and waiting two hours for me and driving me home. No questions asked.’

'I’m so proud of you Lou. I can’t imagine how tough that must have been, but you got through it. And yeah you needed help but everyone needs help sometimes. It doesn't mean you're weak, it just means you’re human. We were never designed to work on our own.’ Harry said quietly, his head swimming with everything he just heard from Louis, feeling so much for him, and being so pissed off at the people who did this to him that he wanted to run to their posh hotel and shake them and yell that they have a brilliant boy on their hands and they try to ruin him.

'Fuck, oversharing much’ Louis laughed a little straightening up.

“no, no no no no’ Harry said quickly pulling Louis back into his embrace 'You do not get to hide from me, okay? You don’t have to. Remember… when I met your parents I told you you were extraordinary, and I meant it then, but up until now I had no idea just how extraordinary you truly are.’

Louis just buried his head into Harry’s side trying to hide either way, blushing under attention and somehow feeling ashamed about what he said, even though he knew he had nothing to be ashamed about but still, he could feel shame swirling inside his body.

'I used to be bullied when I started high school.’ Harry said quietly knowing full well that the only thing that would make Louis feel better about spilling his guts is if he’ll spill one of his own. 'with my hair, and my dimples, they were calling me Harriet just like they were on a playground I think I told you that. But it was so much worse than kindergarten. I always loved pastel colours, my voice was incredibly high and I was signing, and sometimes I would wear mascara or do my nails. It wasn’t like I thought that being called a girl is an insult it's just I wasn’t one, and them throwing me into girls locker room saying that I should change here, or them coming onto me in bathroom trying to take my pants off all the way cause 'They were sure I can’t possibly have a dick’ well it was way more than yelling 'You throw like a girl’ at the courtyard.  So I started to cut my hair really short so they wouldn’t have a chance to curl, I started to wear only black T-shirts and baggy jeans, just to make sure I won’t wear anything overly feminine, I tried to talk slowly because then I could try to lower my voice a little I even went as far as trying not to smile ever. Just so they wouldn’t see my dimples. I was so miserable back then. I only stopped all of this when I came to uni. My mom was so glad when she saw me growing my hair, wearing pink shirt you have no idea. Finally after few months in London I stopped being afraid that someone will mispronounce me on purpose or ridicule for being feminine because there were a lot of guys like that on every corner and no one cared, but those two years of highschool… I never wore a plain black T-shirt again' Harry laughed softly.

'Well you told me the bit about the kindergarten but my point still stands. They were into you, that's why they associated you with a girl cause their little heteronormative brains couldn’t comprehend any different. Still not the excuse to be dick’ Louis finished gritting his teeth.

'I’m still a little bit mad sometimes. That I didn’t stood up. That I just took it and tried to change myself to fit with them’ Harry said quietly.

'You were a kid babe. You can’t beat yourself up about not fighting against the world when you were a child. You shouldn’t have to. And look at you now. Yes you let them change you for a while, but you bounced back, and most important you didn’t turn into bitter asshole, it made you that much caring and attentive. We’ve all got something we wished we handle differently in the past, but we can’t change that now, what we can change is now and tomorrow, and you now…’ Louis said turning around in Harry’s arms ‘... you that is standing in front of me now is … spectacular’ he said softly, caressing Harry’s cheek softly, who blushed and ducked his head down.

‘I’m really glad I spilled a drink on Grimmy’s shirt all those weeks ago’ Harry whispered with a soft private smile playing on his lips.

'What?’ Louis asked confused.

'That’s how I met Grimmy. I spilled a drink on his shirt and then I took him home to wash it out, he was impressed, there was no trace of it. After he got over his initial fear that I will try to hook up we bonded’ Harry laughed.

'What that has to do with anything?’ Louis laughed softly, his hand still holding Harry’s face.

'If I didn’t spill that drink on him, I would never take him home, we would never spend almost all night talking and playing hipster records to each other and he would never invite me to that lunch, the one that I met you on. Long story short If I didn't almost ruin his Gucci shirt I would have never met you, and that…’ he held Louis’ wrist. ‘... that would be a shame.’

Louis’ heart was beating like crazy, he could swore Harry could feel it under his thumb. He was looking at his eyes and he lost himself around his lips somewhere looking at Harry exhaling slowly, he leaned in a little just to test the waters, Harry didn’t move and inch so he leaned some more eyes fixated on his lips. He kissed them before but somehow this would be more.

Just as he was about to touch him first rays of sun fell on them making them squint and jump with surprise. They looked at each other sheepishly.

'We should get back’ Harry said with the hint of question in his voice.

'yeah, you’re right’ Louis said standing up.

And If their hands tangled together as they were going down the hill like they’ve been doing that for years, they both refused to acknowledge it. At least for now. 


	8. Avoidance techniques, chemical reactions and a preemptive strike.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back! I know I suck with giving you updates when it comes to this story but I'll try to better! I got some writers block and I'm dealing with it by writting ten other fics at the same time :D One day I'm just going to dump all of them on you out of the blue :D 
> 
> Anywho! Chapter 8, we're slowly approaching the end of the road. I'm thinking one more and an epilogue. Since no cliche is complete without over the top fluffy epilogue.
> 
> Enjoy lovlies, xx.

Grimmy was babbling on an on about how he got an interview with Jennifer Lawrence next week and how excited he was but every word he said was floating out of Harry's mind immediately. The only thing he wanted to know was how Louis was doing because he haven't seen him in a while. Sure they would still go out from time to time but not as often as while his parents was still here. It seemed like the night on the hill was ages ago even if in reality it was only few weeks.

'How’s Louis?’ Harry asked finally jumping in when Grimmy was swallowing his food.

'um good I think? They interviewed him for a job few days ago. They want to hire him right after he graduates’

'But like how does he feel?’

'Well he’s not all dandy, but can you blame a guy after what went down with his folks? So he’s been a little down lately but I think he just needs some time. You know how he is, no matter how many times you ask he’ll still just tell you that he’s fine’ Grimmy said shrugging a little. It wasn't that he didn’t care, he just didn’t know what he could do.

'I haven’t seen him a long time, and he doesn’t really respond to my texts and I’m just a little worried I guess’ Harry said ducking his head down, hating how unsure he sounded.

He was torn. He didn’t know how to respond to how Louis has been acting because he didn’t know what caused it. He was concerned because he could see it possibly being his depression coming back with him not answering his phone and not going out much but then again maybe he just didn’t want to talk to Harry that much? Maybe he freaked out when they almost kissed and he’s just trying to let him down gently? If that’s the case, how could he run around making a fool out of himself trying to help someone who doesn’t need his help?

'Hold on a second!’ Grimmy yelled with sparkling eyes 'Hold. On. A. Second!! What is this? Are you blushing?!’ he exclaimed looking way to overjoyed with current predicament.

'No!’ Harry yelled defensively

'Oh my God you are so into him!’ Grimmy giggled delighted like it was the best thing he’s ever heard.

'Oh shut up’ Harry said rolling his eyes.

'This is way too good to be true!’ Grimmy mused

'Yeah it's perfect especially since he doesn't text me back!’ Harry snapped.

'Overly attached much?’ Grimmy smirked.

'God you’re such a child honestly, what’s next you gonna write on the board Harry loves Louis? Like we are in actual middle school?’

'I might actually do just that’ Grimmy said thoughtful.

After that Harry was tunning Nick out even more since he was basically twelve and was teasing him mercilessly. Harry left lunch and came back to work, his tie and corporate setting suffocating him more than ever. He shoot Louis another text but he didn't got an answer. He really didn't know how to handle the situation. Well he could have handle rejection If Louis would just man up and say it to his face, but something was telling him that it wasn’t the issue at all. He never really dealt with someone who suffered from depression so he actually had no idea how to approach it. Is he supposed to be motivational? Or understanding? Or should he just kick his ass out of bed and make him do stuff? He didn’t know what approach to use here, he didn’t want to mess it up, because one thing he did know is that it was really sensitive disease. God he was way over his head.

Meanwhile Louis was coming back home from the day of classes and he felt really fucking proud of himself for even going to them. Pride was override though with unsettling feeling that everyone was watching him. He knew it wasn’t true, but no matter how many times he was stabbing his nails into his wrist he still felt that.

He just felt bad, that’s all. He just got disowned by his parents he had a right to be a little broken up about it, so crying from time to time or you know, more frequent than that was completely normal. As long as he didn't bother anyone with his shit, since noone really wanted to hear that either way. It was just so stupid, because God people had real problems, and him acting like a martyr was just pissing him off so much.

He just wished he could just go away and be alone for a while without anyone getting worried. He just needed them to leave him alone, he didn’t know for how long but even If he had a day off and was about to relish in the fact that he has 24 uninterrupted hours to watch tv, eat and jerk off there was still that thought at the back of his brain that someone is gonna call, and he’ll have to go out because If he won’t they’re going to be mad at him, he was pretty sure Harry was already mad, they haven’t been spending much time lately. So even when he technically had time that he could enjoy himself it was spoiled from the start.

Don’t get him wrong, he loved hanging out with Harry. Harry was great, wonderful even, and maybe they did start something, but what if the almost kiss freaked him out? Louis really couldn't handle any rejection now and even thinking about it was making him twitchy and seeing Harry was even worse. Except for the times they were cuddling and Harry wasn’t asking If everything was okay. That was making a lot of the things better actually.

So when he saw another text from Harry his stomach dropped and he tucked it away with the promise of responding to it later. Maybe after he eats, or like in the evening.

When he stepped inside his apartment it was a little surprising to find Niall and Zayn laying on the floor almost entirely naked minus blanket covering their lower halves and having intense stare off. It was surprising because usually Louis walked in on them having really kinky sex, the fact that they were both naked and no one was licking anything was slightly disturbing.

He took of his shoes and hanged his jacket and they still didn’t acknowledge his presence, both staring into each other’s eyes, maybe they wanted to see if they can make each other come like that. Louis read somewhere that it was possible, which was probably bullshit. But who knows with those two they were always trying weird things. Whatever floats their boats I guess.

Finally when he was going back from the kitchen after getting himself a drink and a snack he took in the whole room and noticed, candles and roses and wine and he got a little suspicious.

'Boys.’ he said with curious look on his face. Both Zayn and Niall snapped their heads up and they were, well, glowing. And he knew that technically this term was used to describe pregnant ladies but there was really no better way to explain what was going on with their faces. With matching smiles they both stood up and put on some boxers and jumped into Louis’ space.

'We got engaged.’ Zayn smiled softly, looking at Louis with bright eyes.

'The fucker popped the question!’ Niall yelled 'Can you believe that?! I had everything planned, for the love of god I had bought a ring and this one does a preemptive strike and when I come home today he’s already on his knees!’ Niall says looking in awe at his hand where unmistakably there was a silver band shining.

'I bet it's not the first time that happened' Louis smirked though a little choked down. 'Shit guys! I’m so happy for you! Wow! I.. shit! Congratulations! I love you both so much!’ he says then feeling tears pooling in his eyes, and honestly fuck his hormones for not handling his emotions he can’t be fucking crying at every turn.

But Niall and Zayn just cooed at him and they spend few minutes hugging each other.

'okay guys, I’m gonna give you an engagement present since I can’t possibly afford anything else-’ he laughed '-and I’m gonna stay in your apartment for few days Niall, give you newlyweds some alone time’ Louis smiled widely.

'Lou seriously you don’t have…’ Zayn started

'Oh come on, it's not even an issue. I’ll just grab a few stuff. You should go crazy all over the place.’ Louis laughed 'Maybe except my bed though' he added as an afterthought.

'scout’s honor’ Niall smirked.

'Oh god just because I said it you totally gonna have sex on my bed won’t you?’ Louis asked tentatively.

'Probably’ Niall agreed easily.

'It turns you on in some weird disturbed kind of way?’ Louis added in the same tone of voice

'You have a great ass. We can pretend like you’re there with us without it fucking up our friendship. It’s just a fantasy Louis no need to put your panties in a twist’ Niall said flicking his nose and Louis would be weirded out about his best friend’s fiancee who happens to also be his best friend blantly hitting on him if he didn't knew Niall and didn’t hear that bit about two thousand seventy hundred and sixteen times.

He hugged Niall and teased him about how he’s got to bring it If he wants to win Louis as his best man and then he hugged Zayn, a little bit longer and a little bit tighter. He was just so proud of him. From the moment they started dating Zayn was readying himself for the worst, he always assumes that Niall had one foot at the door and was just waiting for the other shoe to drop, which resulted in him freaking out everytime Niall wanted to mark some kind of milestone in their relationship, first sleepover, introducing to friends, meeting parents, moving in together. Everytime Niall had to bring up the idea, deal with Zayn freak out and then wait for him to get over it, and he got that, he knew how Zayn was but Louis could tell that it was weighing on him a little, he started to think that maybe he wasn’t good enough for Zayn to just risk it all. And now Zayn was the one who made first step, from the shit eating grin on Niall’s face Louis could tell how much it meant to him.

'I’m so proud of you’ he whispered to his best friend and teared up again and after packing a little bit of his things and another round of hugs and goodbyes he grabbed the keys and left.

Niall’s apartment wasn’t that far away but still he decided to took a cub not wanting to rub elbows with people on the subway. Once he was safe inside Niall’s apartment he released a breathe happy that noone was looking at him and judging him on the street. He laid on the bed and put some movie on, creating some white noise, lately it was a necessity he couldn’t even fall asleep without something in the background because every time it was quiet he was left with his own thoughts and they were not a happy bunch.

He mindlessly watched Katniss being an idiot and not choosing Peeta from the very beginning but he let his mind wander to Zayn and Niall, he fought with his brain to just think about them both and soak a little bit of their happiness. At least something great happened today. He couldn't say the same thing about few days before that.

He was halfway into the second Hunger Games movie and he was just about to stumble into the ‘one moment that Katniss isn’t an idiot and kisses Peeta on the beach’ when there was a sharp knock on the door. He paused the movie and squeezed his fists. It wasn't like he was expecting someone, and well that’s exactly what he meant! Everytime he had a little time to himself there was someone interrupting him and making him nervous, and he just didn’t like it.

'Lou it’s me, Niall told me you were here’ he heard Harry’s voice coming through the door.

Oh.

He walked over to the door because honestly did he have another choice? And also maybe they could cuddle a little. It’s just, he really couldn’t decide whether he wanted Harry here or not. Either way he was already here so there was nothing to debate over he pulled the door open.

'You look like shit’ he teased seeing Harry’s pale and tired face. How possible was the fact that even when he looked like shit he still looked breathtakingly beautiful?

'Lou you still want to hang out with me right?’ Harry said on one breathe not really being able to handle the suspense. He was all for helping Louis or just leave him alone If that’s what he needed but he needed to know first If it was done between them or what. 'Like I don’t mean right now or even often but you’re not like over … this?’ he said motioning between the two of them.

Louis got hit with the rush of guilt and was scrapping in his head for any kind of excuse, but he had none. Harry could see him struggling so he jump in.

'I don’t need like an explanation or whatever. It’s simply a yes and no question. And If you say no I’ll be out of your hair, but I just need to know’ he said with soft smile.

'No! Harry of course not!’ Louis then said fiercely and Harry paled ‘I mean… shit! yes of course I still want to hang out with you! Don’t ever think something so stupid okay? If I was over this I would tell you okay? I wouldn't just stop talking to you and wait for you to take a hint. I promise’ he said worrying his bottom lip between his teeth and feeling tears fast approaching again, and for the love of God could it just stop already? To hide it from Harry he stepped into his space and hugged him closely.

'Okay. I'll remember that' Harry said quietly with his face buried between Louis’ shoulder and neck. 'Are you okay Lou?’

'Little ol’ me?’ Louis asked with a wink ungluing himself from Harry’s frame 'I have snacks, Katniss is about to share a passionate kiss with Peeta on a beach and oh… I don’t know If you heard: I have a big great gay wedding to plan! Did they tell you?’ he asked excitedly trying to sway Harry's attention onto something else than him. Harry for the record had an inkling that that’s what was going on, but he figured If Louis wanted to play, he can play.

'You do realise it’s not really pc to refer to it as a 'gay wedding’?’ he asked with a little smirk and could almost see a relief written all over Louis' face. Or maybe he just imagined it there.

'I’m not trying to be pc, I’m trying to be accurate. Since this is going to be basically the gayest event you ever went to.’ Louis said with proud grin tugging onto Harry’s hand and leading him on the bed. He kind of wanted a cuddle now.

'Do you think they’ll wear matching white tuxedos?’ Harry smiled getting on the bed and not wasting any moment before grabbing Louis and hugging him tightly to his chest. Honestly Harry gives the greatest hugs, he like hugs you with his whole body and actually holds you close, using muscles to keep you pressed tight next to him. Also the size difference is kind of doing it for Louis. He always used to date guys smaller than him and now with Harry, it’s the first time he actually knows how it is to be hugged. It’s nice, it maybe doesn’t cure the world, or even him, and it doesn’t make anything go away but it gives him a break. And if once again his hormones are giving him a hard time and need to blow off some steam that's all it is. He’s not crying. It’s just chemical reaction.

They stayed like that for a bit, they finished watching Catching fire and both Mockingjays and Harry tried to ask what’s wrong and Louis just flipped it on him, saying a lot of words but none of the meaning and laughed it off acting like nothing was wrong and he played and played and he thought it must have been his best role yet and he was exhausted with it but he also wanted to cuddle and again he just didn’t know whether he wanted Harry to stay or live him alone.

Finally Harry made that decision for him, saying that he has classes the next day and after kissing Louis’ forehead he was gone. But despite what he told Louis he didn’t go home to finish the paper for uni, he went straight back to Louis’ actual apartment to talk to Zayn.

Niall opened the door with annoyed expression, holding a spatula and wearing an apron. Only an apron. Well cooking naked for your lover is kind of a turn on for Harry so he can understand the sentiment.

'Hi. Sorry that I’m disturbing again but I need to talk to Zayn. Like really really badly. I wouldn’t interrupt your engagement celebrations If it wasn't serious’ he said quickly to stop Niall from literally closing the door in his face.

'He’s kind of tied up’ Niall said tilting his head to the left like he can’t decide what to do, and well, engagement or no engagement Harry didn’t have time for this so he pushed past Niall and moved towards the kitchen, where he expected to find Zayn.

'Sorry Ni, but it’s really fucking important okay? It’s about Lou, he’s not well and Zayn is probably the only one who can help him and I know it sucks for you but he’s your best…’ he exclaimed and stopped himself mid sentence when he opened the door to the kitchen and found Zayn laying on the kitchen island tied with aprons to it by wrist and ankles, with oven mitten covering his penis and an apple in his mouth. What. The. Fuck.

'Oh when you said he was tied up…’ Harry finally chokes out when Niall moves to cover his fiancée up and take an apple out of his mouth.

'I meant that literally’ Niall smirked, and boy nothing fazed that guy, did it.

'Um.. hi Harry' Zayn said blushing still laying back and waiting for Niall to untie him.

‘Well we could definitely do the whole thing where we both embarrassed by me seeing you naked but let’s just move on yeah? I really need to talk to you.’ Harry said turning around letting Zayn cloth himself.

'What’s up?’ he asked putting a hand over Harry’s shoulder and turning him around. He wore two aprons now. One over his front and another one over his back. Well it'll have to make do.

'I saw Lou, and I’m kind of afraid that he’s depressed again.’ Harry mumbled, Zayn sighed and brought Harry to the couch, he sat on it trying not to think about what they were doing on that couch.

'You sure he’s not just sad? I mean, he gets really bad after his parents leave I’ve seen it before, but he gets back to normal. He’s allowed to be sad, Harry, it doesn't mean that he’s depressed again’ Zayn says softly.

'I know that!’ Harry snapped before releasing a breath and rubbing his hands over his eyes. 'I thought that at the beginning, but he told me about the first time he got sick, and everything fits Zayn. He’s been rarely going out, he barely responds to text and everytime I try to talk to him about it he’s just switching the subject or laughs it off. And I don’t know what to do because I’m worried about him, but I don’t think he wants to talk to me about it. He just shruggs me off. I’m in over my head, I don’t know how to handle him, he needs you Zayn’

Niall came back then and handed him a glass of wine with sympathetic smile.

'Thanks’ Harry nods and takes a sip 'he’s not the same. He seems like he is but somehow he’s different. I don’t know how to explain it but I can see it. And it’s not good different, he's just… he just seems defeated.’

'I’ll talk to him tomorrow, okay? I see if this is really coming back again’ Zayn said rubbing Harry’s back.

'Zayn he was crying. I don’t think he noticed that I noticed. But we were cuddling and watching movies and he was crying the whole time. He wasn’t sobbing or anything, he was shaking a little sometimes like he tried to stop it, but mostly it was just running down his cheeks, a little bit soaked through my shirt. You can’t honestly tell me that this is just sad. it’s been weeks! And I’m not saying that he should get over it and move on, because it was awful what happened but he shouldn’t be crying for hours straight after all this time! He should be getting better at least a little bit!’ Harry whispered urgently needing Zayn to believe him.

'Fuck’ Zayn said hiding his face in his hands. Niall started to rub his back his face scrunched with worry.

'Baby If you want we can go to him, or I can just drive you?’ he said with soothing voice.

'No. No' Zayn said shaking his head 'If it’s happening again he doesn't like people just popping in. He needs his space I’m just, I’m just gonna go over there tomorrow, text him in the morning that you had to go to a meeting and I’m bored.’ Zayn said rubbing his hands together nervously. 'I am.. I guess I have to call his doctor. Ask her about some good recommendations here in London.’ he said his voice more and more reminding a robot.

‘Okay, okay, thank you. Can you… um… can you let me know if he’s okay?’ Harry whispered in a small voice.   
  
‘I’ll call you’ Zayn promised squeezing his arm.   
  
Harry left and Niall and Zayn settled on the couch drinking wine. Zayn was playing absently with Niall’s new ring.    
  
‘He’s going to be fine baby.’ Niall said quietly. ‘He just needs some help. He’s done it before, he beat it once he’ll beat it again.’   
  
‘I just can’t believe I didn’t notice! Jesus Christ Niall he lives with us! How could I not have noticed? What kind of a friend I am?’ Zayn asked looking at Niall with sad eyes.   
  
‘You can’t beat yourself up. Someone noticed, that it important, someone did and now we’re going to do something about it.’ Niall promised soothingly.

Next day Zayn didn't waste any time and called Louis in the morning, he didn’t know whether he told him the truth but Louis swore he was in classes so they decided to hang out after that. Zayn called in sick at work and was pacing around the apartment nervously waiting until he could drive to Niall’s apartment to see Louis. He clutched in his hand piece of paper with an address on it. He had a long conversation with Louis’ therapist and she recommended a doctor in a city. Zayn already made an appointment hoping he will be able to persuade Louis to go today.    
  
He took a car knowing full well Louis hated to be in public spaces longer than he had to when he was sick. Or at least that’s how it was the last time. He was driving excruciatingly slow cause his body was throbbing with worry and he didn’t want to cause an accident. He pulled up in front of Niall’s apartment and gave himself a pep talk before taking few deep breathes and stepping out of the car.

It was way too early for Louis to be back from classes but Zayn couldn't stand sitting around at home so he just grabbed spare keys. Now he twisted them in a lock and stepped into the apartment.

His eyes landed on a small shape on bed. Louis was wearing a hoodie and had earphones plugged into his computer. He had few plates and a bottle of coke within arm's reach. Zayn sighed. Classes, huh?

He closed the door after himself and moved tentatively towards Louis not wanting to startle him. When the other boy noticed Zayn’s presence he jumped a little and then heavy blush colored his cheeks. Zayn wanted to assure him that nothing was wrong so he smiled widely throwing himself next to Louis on a bed.

'You look comfy, wonder If you would feel so comfy If you knew what kind of things we did on this bed’ he laughed trying to change the conversation, knowing that Louis’ mind was going in circles trying to come up with an excuse why he wasn't in classes when he specifically said he will be.

'Like what?’ Louis asked.

'Well for example this is the bed I got deflowered on’ Zayn giggled kissing Louis cheek.

'Too much information Z’ Louis said scrunching his nose. 'You're earlier’ he noted hesitantly.

'Yeah, didn’t have much to do at home. Niall is at work, I have today of and he made me swear on his life that I won't start planning this wedding without him so here I am. Bugging you earlier than you thought’ Zayn agreed easily.

'Yeah well, my last course was cancelled so you’re in luck that I’m here’ he said a little nervously.

Zayn made a mental note of his disheveled hair and and a pillow mark on his cheek but he didn’t say a word. He knew Louis will be feeling guilty about this lie in about three seconds, he was here to help him with his problems not create new ones.

'What are you watching?’ he asked instead

‘Dreamgirls’ Louis said.

'you watched that movie at least hundred times’ Zayn smiled amused.

'Effie is highly misunderstood. She is a true victim in the whole situation, I think she needs some support’ Louis teased lightly already trying to take the subject far away from any touchy topic.

'Speaking of’ Zayn started, Louis might be a master of avoiding tactics but Zayn had years with dealing with it. 'Let’s go for a smoke’ he said standing up and plucking laptop from Louis unsuspecting hands.

'Are you okay Lou?’ Zayn said when they sat down on a balcony.

'I’m fine’ Louis said confidently.

'Lou, I’m scared that you might be getting sick again’ Zayn said quietly taking Louis’ hand in his and purposely talking to it rather that looking into his eyes, Louis was probably mortified the way he was last time it happened. 'I know that you don’t want to talk about it, you are probably panicking right now thinking of a way to make me stop, but I want you to know that you don’t have to. You don’t have to think of some excuses to tell me. Whatever you’re feeling is okay even If it’s 'I don’t know’ or 'I just couldn't go to class’. I get all of it. You don’t have to pretend with me, okay? I was here the last time, I’m not going to think whatever it is you’re thinking that I think. I’m not going to think that you're a screw up or a loser or that you should get yourself together. I’m here okay?’

'I’m not sick Z, I’m fine’ Louis said like mantra, though a little choked.

'You didn't go to classes today. I bet that last week maybe you were there for one day.’ Zayn said calmly and could feel Louis’ pulse under his thumb picking up 'Stop Lou, I understand! It’s okay, it’s okay. I don’t care that you weren’t there it’s fine. It’s okay, baby it’s okay’ he said and he got himself armful of his crying best friend.

'I’m sorry. I don’t know why I lied to you. It’s just… I'm just… I… I don’t know’ he whispered into Zayn’s chest.

'Hopeless? Scared? It’s okay Lou. Do you remember, it was the same last time’ Zayn said rocking him a little, Louis hiding his face completely. 'I got us an appointment with a doctor. Yours is too far away but she recommended this one. Do you want me to take you?’ he asked softly. 'You don't have to drive there by subway and be with strangers, I’m going to drive you there and drive you back home, okay? What do you say?’ he asked barely above whisper worried that he’ll startle him.

Louis wasn’t answering for the longest time hiding his face until finally he unglued himself from Zayn and pushed himself away, leaning his back onto the railing opposite of his best friend with his fists squeezed tightly.

'Shit.’ he said running his palms over his face 'Yeah, um, I should probably go’ he said avoiding Zayn’s eyes completely.

'Loulou, I know you’re ashamed now, but you don’t have anything to be ashamed of okay? Just go take a shower and we’ll drive there okay? I love you. Very much so. ‘ Zayn said softly ‘Especially with that sex hair you’re sporting right now’ he added teasingly knowing that Louis needed some humor, cause the seriousness of the situation was only making him anxious.

'well yeah I should probably do something about it’ Louis said and a small smile he send Zayn on his way to the bathroom was considered a win.

The whole drive to the doctor’s office was quiet, Zayn tried to defuse tension with few jokes here and there but ultimately there was nothing he could do. So he just smiled at Louis, put on some music to keep him occupied and hold his hand in a waiting room. When Louis went in Zayn flipped through some magazines, shot a text to Harry, as promised, that he took care of it and was left waiting anxiously with his foot tapping the floor for over an hour before Louis finally emerged from the doctor’s office.

'See you next week Louis’ the doctor smiled warmly and both Louis and Zayn went outside.

'Thank you Z.’ Louis said squeezing his friend’s arm 'I knew it was back it’s just… it’s always way to hard to do something about it. Even if you knew you should. So thanks for noticing’

'Actually.. um, Harry is the one who came to me saying he’s afraid that your depression came back. He’s the one who noticed’

'Shit, he’s going to think I’m pathetic.’ Louis groaned.

'For what it’s worth Lou I don’t think he will, he was worried about you yes but…’ Zayn started.

'Don’t tell him. Don’t tell him more than you have to, just tell him I’m fine. I… I don’t want him to know. Telling him about the last time was easy, it was so long ago, but now, I don’t want everyone to know, promise me Z okay? Just you and Niall, okay?’ Louis said clutching onto Zayn’s bicep with pleading expression.

'I won't. Promise.’ he said with understanding smile.

Louis nodded and just like that it was a little easier to breathe.


	9. Midnight madness, kinky umbrella and home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooo...... I am SO SO sorry. I know I'm shitty with updates, but I signed up for two fic exchanges and I was writting those and also this story is kind of hitting too close to home sometimes with what Louis is going through and it is hard sometimes to write it. BUT! to everyone who wants to - write to me on [Tumblr](http://exquisitetrouble.tumblr.com) with prompt and I will write you an 'I apologize you waited this long for the update' fic :D Really, DO THIS. I love getting prompts :D
> 
> Also, give a round of applause to my lovely [beta](https://archiveofourown.org/users/tempolarriefics) for jumping on this one when it was already nearly finished but doing such an incredible job as always!

So Louis only had one question. And that question was: who the fuck told those fuckers that a summer wedding was the best option? Because let me tell you, summer in the city was hard enough with people filling the tube to the brim, half of them with overdue appointments with a shower, rubbing all of their sweat and stench off on poor Louis. But now not only did he have to stand usual summer in London fuckery, he had to do it while driving around town picking flower arrangements and seating charts and suits because Zayn couldn’t decide whether he wanted to go with classic or something more adventurous and Niall insisted on wearing white and…. for the love of God! Louis just really wanted to bang his head on the train car window. 

 

Obviously Zayn and Niall tried to talk him out of helping, assuring him that they got this and there was no need for him to exhaust himself. And well he would take them up on that if it wasn’t for the fact that they were just trying to baby him. His mental breakdown was weeks ago thank you very much, he was going to a therapist only once every two weeks and he was fine.

 

Well okay, he wasn’t  _ fine  _ fine. But he was better and the thing about this disease was, acknowledging that that’s what is happening was halfway to getting better already. So he didn’t need them to tiptoe around him and try not to overwhelm him with life because the point of recovery was to actually  _ Iive.  _

 

Also he kind of had a lot of time on his hands since he graduated two weeks prior and now he’s only job was, finally a paid one, working on Grimmy’s show. They even let him go on air with Grimmy once every week just to try it out for future reference. So he was more than happy to help with planning, especially since Niall was killing himself at work day at night, taking every freelance job that came his way and Zayn had found a second job in order to pay for the whole shindig. Running their errands around town when they both barely even had time to permanently scar Louis with having sex on every surface of their apartment was the least he could do. 

 

His phone rang interrupting his train of thoughts and it took a little of fidgeting to take it out of his pocket without letting go of four sample cakes, two possible flower arrangements and one white on white designer suit, but he managed and picked up the phone at it’s last ring.

 

'Hi Lou’ Harry’s chirpy voice came through the receiver. 'Where are you?’ 

 

'I’m in the tube. And I’ll probably lose you in a second, but I’ll be at the apartment in like half an hour’ Louis smiled despite himself.

 

'Good! We’re waiting! I brought Liam and Jordan for cake tasting and I have my supplies for fitting Niall’s suit. We’re all set!’ Harry reported happily and the urge to smack his head against the window reawakened in Louis with double force. 

 

'That’s great baby. I have to go cause the reception is shit but I’ll see you in a bit' he smiled.

 

'Cool Lou! See you!’ Harry giggled and the line went dead. 

 

This time Louis didn't stop himself from banging his head against the window. Harry was just too cute for his own good. Hell! He was too cute for Louis’ good, and somehow they both had found themselves stuck in this limbo where they weren’t strictly just friends anymore but they weren’t boyfriends either. 

 

Louis figured that with his depression making a surprise comeback, he should probably sort himself out before trying to bring Harry into this, and Harry on the other hand was trying to give Louis his space, understanding how stressful everything was for him and not wanting to pile up on top of that. So they kept on hanging out, and Harry kept on forgetting about the basic concept of personal space, and there were a lot of pet names and soft touches involved but they both saw the line and quietly agreed not to cross it. 

 

But there were more important things now, like the fact that the wedding was just two weeks away and there were still tons of things to do, including writing his best man’s speech. Since he intended to make it as embarrassing as he possibly could he needed to take his time with this one. 

 

Finally the tube arrived at his stop and Louis left the station, punching his oyster card against the machine with way more force than necessary and mumbling about how much he fucking hated people. He was grumbling about it under his breath all the way home right until the point when he stepped into the flat and saw Harry.

 

He was wearing black and white striped pants with a white shirt that left absolutely nothing to the imagination and in his hair he had forget-me-nots. Louis wanted to strangle him. 

 

'Hiya Lou!’ he laughed over the mouthful of pins in his mouth that he was using to pinch the fabric of Zayn’s suit that he'd promise to get fitted alongside Niall’s. 

 

'Hi Haz.’ he said softly putting all of his luggage on the table next to Zayn’s feet. 'Hi Z. You’re going with midnight madness, then?’ Louis laughed looking up at his best friend.

 

'You realise that’s not what this suit is called at all right?’ Zayn smiled, rolling his eyes. 'And yes, I figured just black would be boring and Niall suggested I should shine bright like a diamond on our big day so here I am. Wearing something black but also sparkling.’ 

 

'You look amazing in this’ Louis answered truthfully.

 

'Hi Lou!’ he heard behind him and turned around to see Liam and Jordan stepping out of the kitchen both holding steaming bowls of something that smelled incredible.

 

'Hi guys, I have cake samples so we will need your opinion. What are you eating?’ he sniffed Liam’s bowl and his mouth watered.

 

'Go get your own Tommo.’ Liam laughed and sat on the couch, pushing his legs on Jordan’s lap. 'You know Zayn, you really are terribly sexy. I might go for you.’ he added thoughtfully.

 

'Um… thanks?’ Zayn said blushing slightly.

 

'I feel like I should be jealous but on the other hand I agree, so’ Jordan shrugged and Liam cooed at him making a kissy face. When had Louis started to hang out with couples and Harry only?

 

'Jesus Christ I step out for a second to take a call and you try to steal my husband to be?’ they heard Niall’s amused tone. 'Hi Lou.’ he kissed Louis quickly on the cheek before moving to his fiancée and letting his hands wander over his legs up and down, eyeing him with adoration. 'I have to say…’ he murmured 'I will very much enjoy taking this off on our wedding night’ he finished with sly smile.

 

'Do you think you may want to take it off now?’ Zayn asked with quirked eyebrow making not so subtle gesture towards their bedroom.

 

'Hey!’ Harry exclaimed, looking offended. 'I came here to fit you into your suits, you can go fuck later' he said pinning Zayn’s sleeve.

 

'Yeah you know, give us an hour’ Niall said in unbothered manner watching as Zayn slowly unbuttoned his shirt 'Maybe two’ he added as an afterthought and pulled Zayn with him, leaving a dumbfounded Harry, giggling Liam and Jordan and completely unfazed Louis in the living room.

 

'What the fuck?’ Harry asked looking at Louis for some kind of explanation.

 

'They are actually better now. They barely even have time to have sex these days so you can’t blame them’ Louis smiled from his place on the sofa.

 

'I mean you saw Zayn right? I would be totally fucking him all day every day If he was my fiancee’ Liam said thoughtfully.

 

'Totally babe!’ Jordan agreed not even raising his eyes.

 

Harry sighed, defeated, and put down his pins. 'Lou do you want dinner?’ he asked then, looking for something to do with himself.

 

'You brought dinner?’ Louis perked up visibly, his body raising slightly on the couch.

 

'I cooked.’ Harry preened like he was waiting for a prize. ‘And I hope Liam and Jordan didn’t eat it all?’ He asked, raising a questioning eyebrow at his friends.

 

'Not yet!’ Jordan chirped happily.

 

'Oh my God you cooked this?’ Louis moaned, once again sniffing Liam’s plate.

 

'Come on, I’ll heat it up for you’ Harry dimpled, pulling Louis up from the couch by his hand. 

 

The fact that they didn't let go of each other’s hands after that went one hundred percent noticed but completely unacknowledged.

 

'So how is best man speech going?’ Harry asked casually, moving around Louis’ kitchen like it was his own.

 

'Like shit.’ Louis admitted, opening the fridge and taking out two bottles of beer. 'You want one?’ he asked Harry who nodded.

 

'Need any help?’ Harry asked, tying an apron around his hips.  _ An apron.  _ Louis didn't know that domesticity turned him on but apparently that was the case.

 

'I just can’t decide which embarassing Ziall story to tell.’ Louis said, hopping on the counter and dangling his feet in the air.

 

'Well you probably should avoid all the sex related stuff since it would be awkward with close family there.' Harry hummed

 

'I know.’ Louis groaned 'But you’ve met those two! Everything is fucking sex related!’ Louis exclaimed heavily.

 

'Oh come on! There had to be a moment when they weren’t having sex.’ Harry rolled his eyes, stirring the food in the pot. Louis was just about to to level him with unimpressed gaze that would suggest 'they literally made plans with you and then halfway through them decided to have sex instead,’ but suddenly Harry's words gave him an idea.

 

He jumped of the counter with huge smile and bounced over to Harry, kissing his cheek excitedly. 'You’re a genius Haz!’ he exclaimed

 

'What did I do? Did I help?’ Harry asked giggling, alternating between checking on the food and smiling at Louis brightly. 

 

'Yes! There is a huge chance that Niall is going to kill me for telling this story but fuck it. It’ll be totally worth it!’ Louis grinned maniacally.

 

'What story?’ Harry asked promptly, getting curious.

 

'I guess you’ll find out in two weeks.’ Louis trailed off with innocent expression.

 

'Oh come on! I helped you!’ Harry said outraged. 

 

'And I am eternally grateful,’ Louis allowed. 'Your prize is: driving me around tomorrow when I deliver cheques and the final decision from the grooms!’ Louis exclaimed like he was presenting a million dollar cheque. 

 

Harry looked at him unimpressed but Louis could just see the smile threatening to cut his face in half until finally Harry let him.

 

'Okay I know you’re taking advantage of me but spending day with you actually sounds wonderful.’ Harry smiled looking at his feet at the end of the sentence, and hiding his blush by busying himself with emptying the pot with Louis’ food on the plate.

 

'I’ll take you to ice cream after’ Louis promised, his voice way too soft to be considered casual.

 

They went back to the living room where Liam and Jordan were cuddling on the couch with the TV blasting at full volume.

 

'WE’RE TRYING TO TUNE OUT THEIR SEX NOISES!’ Jordan yelled over the speakers, while Harry and Louis joined them on the couch. Harry snatched Louis’ waist immediately and pulled him to rest on his chest.

 

'Speak for yourself, I didn’t want to tune out anything’ Liam smirked.

 

'Dude, he’s getting married in two weeks and your boyfriend is literally in your lap.’ Louis said rolling his eyes. 

 

Over the course of few weeks he and Liam had become… well he wouldn’t say friends, but friend _ ly  _ friend _ ish.  _ Louis was hanging out at Harry’s a lot, and with the threat of Liam hitting on Harry gone, so was Louis’ jealousy. He had started to tag along, and Jordan with him, to parties with Louis, Zayn and Niall, who were over the moon about having another couple to double date with. It was a win-win. 

 

'Well my boyfriend wouldn’t mind having Zayn on his lap.’ Liam smirked.

 

'No I would not.’ Jordan nodded smugly

 

'I kind of have a feeling Niall would veto that.’ Harry smiled, amused.

 

'Yeah’ Liam sighed like he had actually considered that to be a possibility. 

 

Louis just shook his head fondly, turning to Harry and finding that Harry was already looking at him. When Louis finished eating, he brought out the cake samples and made everyone rate them on a scale from one to ten on special cards he had printed at work earlier. He was nothing if not a professional, thank you very much. 

 

After guys left to go home, he left the remainings of the cake on the kitchen table with a note to Zayn and Niall for them to try them and write down which one they decided on. He needed to go to the bakery tomorrow for the love of God. Louis knew that Niall would get it done - after all, there was nothing quite as important to him as food.

 

The minute Louis woke up the next day he could feel that the day would be shit. He gritted his teeth and opened his laptop, quickly putting on and episode of Shameless he had seen literally twenty times and put his headphones in quickly, needing some white noise to distract himself. He walked around house with it, bringing it even to the bathroom knowing full well that if he gave himself a space to think even for a second his anxiety would take over and he wouldn’t be able to go to work or run errands with Harry, and those were two things that he definitely needed to do today so Shameless season five it was. 

 

Before going to work, like always, he procrastinated, sitting on the couch fully dressed still trying to think of a reason to get out of his responsibilities for the day. He curled his fist, his short fingernails digging into his palm. He wanted to laugh. Because the whole situation was just ridiculous. He could tell with to minute accuracy how this morning would go, because he knew how he operated during his episodes. He knew that he would sit here and wait for a freaking piano to fall from the sky and save him from the misery this day would be, and he knew that finally he would get up and leave at the last possible moment. He was that good at identifying what was happening to him that he could tell that, today was bad but not bad enough for him to just say fuck it and hide. And it was so fucking laughable how he knew exactly what was happening but had no means whatsoever to stop it. It was like watching a car crash in slow motion, and karma was just expecting him to roll around and take it.

 

As soon as he stepped out of the house, with exactly seven minutes to get to the tube, he was jittery and uncomfortable. He knew very well that people weren’t staring at him, but it didn’t stop him from feeling like literally everyone on the street was watching him and suddenly judging his appearances and his character, like somehow all of them knew  that he had mental health issues and were judging him for it.

 

By the time he got on the train, his wrist was red from all the scratching and pinching Louis did in order to keep himself in check. It didn’t help at all that the tube was full of people, so Louis just upped the volume on his iPod and looked at the ground silently praying for this ride to end.

 

As predicted, work didn’t help much and Louis spent the whole day bargaining with himself. The only thing that kept him going was lying to himself that, he was already almost finished! Or that he just needed to do this one thing and then he would get to go home and hide. That he just needed to push through and endure it because there was no way for him to fight it. 

 

So he did, and he did his job, and he talked to people, as briefly as he could while still being considered polite. He avoided Grimmy as much as he could, knowing that he was probably the only person who could actually tell that something was off, considering that they were friends. The work day was only eight hours but each of one seemed like an eternity and Louis had to take trips to the bathroom almost every other minute now because after such a long time it was proving to be too much for him. 

 

Finally, finally! He was done for the day and he couldn’t have been out of the door faster. He went out back and sat on a steps there for a second, lighting up a cigarette. The BBC building was suffocating him but he didn’t reckon it would be much better once he was on the streets again. So he gave himself fifteen minutes and a cigarette to at least get himself together enough to drive to meet Harry, and then just take it from there. 

 

He mindlessly flipped through his phone, deciding that leaving him with his thoughts alone was a recipe for disaster. After a second cigarette, a text from Harry that read he left work and was on his way and a ten minute long pep talk he gave himself in his head, he got it together enough to move and bear the streets.

 

Surprisingly (not) being in Harry’s presence was doing nothing to make him better. Hell, it actually made him that much worse, because his anxiety was whispering in his ear that Harry would see how bad he was and would run for the hills. That he didn’t need someone crazy for him to have to take care of, that Louis was weak and should just get it together or that he was a drama queen or a loser and nothing wrong was happening and he was just trying to get attention. And no matter how many times Louis would reason with himself that Harry was nowhere near the kind of person that would say those kinds of unsensitive and outright offensive things, there was a small part of him that was hell bent on making him question it. And it didn’t take much, just this one small voice at the back of his brain saying 'What if?’ 

 

But the thing with him and Harry? They rarely acknowledged his disease. Of course Louis joked about it all the time. Hell, he made a job out of mocking himself in a twisted form of protection against other people doing it for him. So yeah he would joke about crying himself to sleep for no reason whatsoever, or having a panic attack in the McDonald's bathroom on the way to work and yeah all of those were true but every time Harry tried to comfort him and tell him something along the lines of 'I’m sorry that it happened to you,’ Louis would shut down immediately, retracting and depreciating his pain as if it was nothing. 

 

So now they were already past their visit to the bakery where Louis paid for the cake and let the chef know which one the grooms had chosen. They were on their way to the florist with another cheque, and Harry could see that Louis was not well. But ever since they first saw each other today  he had been trying to bring it up in a way that wouldn’t make Louis blow up. Finally when he saw Louis flinch, shrinking on himself for the third time after someone on the street touched him, he stopped Louis by his hand and pulled him into a side street that was a little less popular that particular afternoon.

 

'Here,’ he said, taking out a cigarette and handing it to Louis 'Give me the list and the cheque. I will deliver them myself, you’re going home’ Harry said, taking out his phone. 

 

'What are you…’ Louis started with an expression Harry knew all too well, resembling a  deer caught in the headlights.

 

'Lou, you don’t have to talk to me about it. I know you don’t want to, and whatever the reason - it’s fine. I don’t mind, but we’re still friends, and I can see you’re not well today and I’m betting that you just want to be alone now. So give me the list and the cheques and I’ll take care of it while you take the uber I just ordered for you.’ Harry said softly, smiling lightly. He could see Louis getting embarrassed, taking out the list from his bag with shaky hands.

 

'Lou, don’t feel bad about this. Please, please don't be embarrassed. Can we just… this is… ‘ Harry said frantically trying to come up with anything to make Louis feel better. 'It's a disease Lou, it’s the same as having a migraine or a stomach ache’ he added with pleading eyes that Louis couldn't see, too busy staring at the floor.

 

'Well a stomachache wouldn’t be this mortifying, now would it?’ Louis snapped raising his eyes, his brain twisting Harry's caring words into something ugly. He felt like Harry pitied him.

 

'Well it would if it was combined with diarrhea.’ Harry shrugged. 'Can we just pretend you shat your pants?’ he added then hopefully, and Louis couldn't help but erupt into huge fit of laughter that was half relieved and half nervous. 

 

'Um. Yeah. I will be mortified tomorrow I guess. Shitting your pants in front of a cute boy is not ideal.’ Louis smiled, looking up at Harry.

 

'The cute boy doesn’t mind.’ Harry murmured. 'The cute boy knows that you could do nothing to prevent the diarrhea. And if the cute boy likes other cute boys he should probably be aware of the reality of shit, with the whole anal sex thing.’ Harry smiled tilting his head to the side and Louis giggled again.

 

'Okay so. You have everything in that envelope. You can call me if you’re not sure about something, but I wrote everything down so it should be pretty clear’ Louis smiled shyly, pointing towards the plastic envelope he handed to Harry earlier.

 

Before either of them could say another word a car pulled up next to them, a middle aged man rolling down the window and asking them if they had ordered an uber. Louis nodded and tentatively moved to hug Harry, who wrapped him in his arms without hesitation. They both held on a little too tight and a little too long for it to be able to pass as casual, and the kiss Harry placed on Louis’ temple when they moved millimeters away from each other lingered few beats longer than strictly necessary. But that was nor here nor there. As always. 

 

Louis came home, and the rest of the day was anything but glamorous. His anxiety didn't let go and after he finally got tired of watching tv series and playing games on his phone, he fell asleep. The last time his anxiety had gotten this bad he had just needed one thing to distract himself, but now he found out that even with music or a movie in the background his thoughts still drifted to unwanted places, hence an e-book on his phone or a game.

 

The next two weeks provided enough distraction with the build up to the wedding so that he only had a few more episodes. Most times he was too knackered to even think, or maybe he just was getting better. With the strange twist of faith, the day of the wedding he woke up completely fine. He jumped out of bed and went to the kitchen to make some breakfast, looking at the clock and deciding that the future husbands could sleep for a few minutes more. He went to wake them up and groaned out loud when he saw them both unabashedly naked on the bed. He covered his eyes and picked up the umbrella that stood next to the door and nudged Zayn's ass with it.

 

'Wake up, you insufferable sex monsters’ he said 'The most important day of your life is upon us!’ he added cheerily and could hear Zayn groaning.

 

'Lou what the fuck?’ Niall moaned. 

 

'I made you breakfast, the car will be here in forty minutes to pick us up. We have to go to the venue. You can take your showers then. Go eat and I’ll pack you' Louis said, tapping Zayn’s ass with an umbrella.

 

'We packed yesterday’ Zayn mumbled

 

'Also you know we used that yesterday right?’ he heard Niall’s smug voice.

 

'Used what?’ Louis asked since he was still closing his eyes and couldn’t see what Niall was talking about.

 

'The umbrella you’re holding’ he heard a muffled giggle from Zayn and he let go of the umbrella in the speed of light.

 

'What would… why would you even… where…. ‘ Louis mumbled frantically before stepping back. 'You know what, I don’t even want to know where the fuck you put that. Drag your kinky asses out of bed and join me for breakfast.’ 

 

He moved to the kitchen and put some soft music on wanting to get both of his friends in a good mood for the day, and they came inside the kitchen a few minutes after him holding hands and smiling at each other, not even watching where they were going. 

 

'So how are we feeling today?’ Louis asked smiling when they all sat down at the table and started to eat.

 

'Um…’ Zayn said smiling at the table. 'Actually… good.’ he added like he was a little confused by the fact.

 

'No one wants to run for the hills and make me be a runaway driver?’ Louis joked.

 

'I’m pretty sure that even if one of us wanted that we wouldn’t say that in front of the other one’ Niall snorted. 'But no. We're … we’re calm.’ he added with the same smile that Zayn did. 'We’re good’ he finished nodding his head.

 

'Awesome. So when we get to the venue I make sure that everything is the way it should and you just have to make yourself pretty and get hitched!’ he exclaimed overdoing his excitement like he would while talking to a child.

 

'Sounds great’ Niall smiled with a small private smile directed at Zayn.

 

Louis bit his bottom lip because it was way too early for him to get emotional and cry. He was one hundred percent sure he would cry at the actual reception but that was hours away so what the actual fuck. 

 

They drove to the venue and Louis immediately shooed them both away to their respective dressing rooms where the second best man, Niall’s brother- Greg, was already waiting along with their parents and Zayn’s sisters. He was walking around venue to make sure that everything was in place, both Zayn and Niall had agreed that they would much rather spend on honeymoon more and decided against hiring a wedding planner opting for doing everything themselves, but Louis simply refused to let them be nervous through the entire process and took most of the planning on his back. 

 

He double and then triple checked everything and was confident enough that everyone knew what their job was that he moved to Zayn’s dressing room to change and check on him. 

 

He saw Zayn standing clad in his fancy suit and smoking a cigarette through the crack in the window, he was peacefully looking over the lawn with the huge white tent pitched on it that was supposed to hold the reception. He walked in slowly and let out a soft greeting not to startle his best friend.

 

'Where is everyone?’ Louis asked coming to sit beside Zayn on the windowsill

 

'I ordered them out’ Zayn smiled softly 'My dad was crying ever since he saw me about 'his little boy getting married’ my mom was snapping at him that if he cries she will too and she can’t afford to ruin her make up and the girls were bouncing off of me all the time asking me thousand of question about how I’m doing and do I think Niall will be a runaway bride.’ Zayn snorted. 'I needed some peace and quiet.’ 

 

'You do seem strangely fine.’ Louis noted assessing his best friend 'Are you sure it’s not just calm before the storm? Am I supposed to be ready for a huge freak out?’ he asked only half joking.

 

'Nah’ Zayn smiled again with a wistful smile. 'I’m really okay. I don’t even know how to explain it.’ he shook his head 'I was expecting to be nervous or at least a little bit twitchy, I mean this is a big commitment here, we’re talking the rest of our lives in sickness in health and all that, but I just, I don’t feel nervous at all. I tried to imagine my life without Niall in it and I simply can’t. I love him. I love him more than I ever loved anyone, and the perspective of being with him literally for the rest of our lives … it doesn’t scare me. Some things just… they make you feel warm and happy inside. Like you made it. Like you’re home.’ 

 

Louis couldn’t help himself when he leaned in and wrapped Zayn up in a tight hug, 'I’m so proud of you Z. I’m so proud of both of you.’ he murmured into Zayn’s neck. 

 

'Thanks Lou. I’m proud of you too.’ Zayn whispered back 'It will suck to live without you' he added then leaning back and pouting at Louis. 

 

'Oh come on you’re not moving out just yet, you didn’t even find a place! You still have to go on your honeymoon and then find an apartment. It will be months until you will be ready to move out for good.’ Louis smiled, the vision of Zayn and Niall moving out tugging at his heart strings too, but he was not keen on showing it.

 

'God it’s so pathetic that we will be married and still live in your apartment.’ Zayn groaned 

 

'Oh come on, you don’t have to do it like everyone else, you can make your own rules. Hell, the whole movement of gay rights stands on the idea of not doing it like everyone else.' Louis laughed.

 

‘Okay Ghandi, get dressed it's almost time.’ Zayn laughed shoving Louis away. 

 

Louis put on the suit and combed his hair, deciding on leaving it down in a fringe, and only partly because he discovered Harry preferred it like that. He sprayed some cologne on himself and looked in the mirror, turning a little to the left and then right to check out his profile. When he raised his head a little, he saw Zayn watching him amusedly in the mirror.

 

'So, Zaynie. Let’s get you hitched huh?’ he smirked, tilting his head to the side.

 

And so they went.

 

Saying that Louis cried all the way through the ceremony would be the understatement of the century. He was bawling his eyes out, but then again he wasn’t the only one. Niall in all white and Zayn wearing his sparkling black suit were standing in front of the aisle of flowers, holding hands and saying their vows while never looking away from each other. They made a beautiful picture. 

 

After that there came wishes and gifts and finally, finally everyone gathered in the tent to eat dinner. That was the first time Louis could sneak out, having his best man duties done for the moment. He wracked through the image of the seating chart he had embedded in his brain looking for Harry and after a second moved in the right direction with a triumphant smile. Harry was seated by the table with Liam, Jordan, a few of Louis’ and Zayn's friends from home, and Lottie and Blake. Louis, under the pretext of saying hello to his sister, sauntered over to the table and wrapped an arm around Charlie.

 

'Hello my beautiful sister.’ he kissed her cheek 'Wait. Are those heels?!’ he asked in mock outrage. 'Where are your sneakers at?’ he teased.

 

'Oh shut up, do you know how bloody uncomfortable those are?’ she snapped, massaging her feet.

 

'Just give everyone three hours to get drunk, and then you can definitely go barefoot’ he assured her, looking around the table and nodding in greeting to the people sitting there but not finding the one he was looking for. 'Where is um.. where's Harry?’ he asked innocently and Lottie snorted.

 

'You're so bloody obvious,’ she laughed. 'He went to get drinks with Blake. They will be right back, big brother don’t you worry’ she cooed at him, pinching his cheeks.

 

'Fuck you,’ he snapped right back with wide smile.

 

'Right back at ya’ she laughed with fond look. 

 

'Hello, gorgeous’ he heard behind himself and his body acted on its own accord when he broke into huge smile and stood up to greet Harry.

 

'Hi cupcake. Good to see you.' He smiled back and stood in his tiptoes to kiss Harry’s cheek.

 

'Quite a waterfall at the reception huh?’ Harry smirked around the brim of his glass.

 

'Oh fuck off, everyone was crying’ Louis laughed. The best thing about Harry, okay maybe not the best, but one of the best was the fact that he didn’t walk around Louis on eggshells. A lot of people after finding out about his mental health problems were afraid of even teasing him, worrying that he might take it to heart too much. Don’t get him wrong, sometimes he did, but people treating him like he was something that needed to be handled carefully wasn’t making him any better, especially since his biggest concern was that he was a burden on everyone. 

 

'You sure you're good to give your speech?’ Harry smiled, setting his drink on the table. 'I could probably give it for you’ he shrugged then.

 

'Oh now I know what this is about! You just want to hear the embarrassing Niall story before everyone else!’

 

'You got me!’ Harry exclaimed throwing his hands up before crossing them behind his back. 'Guilty as charged, feel free to handcuff me detective.’ he added, his voice dropping an octave lower and his body moving closer, touching Louis from head to toe.

 

'You… um… you… I… uh… ‘ Louis stuttered out blushing. 'I… ‘ he added and took a deep breath. 'I should probably go before you give me a hard on in the middle of the fucking reception’ he snapped, turning on his heels and walking away with Harry’s laughter echoing in his ears.

 

They ate dinner, the grooms had their first dance, and after a few hours when everyone was already tipsy enough and the sun began to set, the band announced the best man toasts. 

 

Greg stood up first from his place beside Niall, smiling softly at his brother and Zayn. 

 

‘I’ve been around for a long time.’ he started 'I was there when Niall was in kindergarten and running around with his best friend Bressie holding hands, I was there when he claimed that girls were icky all the way through middle school, and despite what teachers told him, he didn’t change his mind.’ Everyone laughed happily. 'I was also there when he casually strolled in the house when he was around fifteen and informed mom and dad that he was going on a date with Zack’ Maura and Bobby, Niall’s parents, looked at each other knowingly. 'We thought, well great he has a date with a nice boy, only to realise that Zack was three years older and was driving a motorcycle.’ Another murmur of laughter went through the masses.

 

'I would like to say that that was that when it came to my brother’s fascination with bad boys, but unfortunately he just got worse. He went through every asshole in highschool and he continued with the tradition when he went to London for college. We all but just about gave up, since every boy he brought home was worse that the one before. And then he called me up in the middle of the night, clearly drunk, blabbing about how he met his future husband and how he had made an absolute fool out of himself.’ Greg put his hand on Niall’s shoulder. 'For a year after that the only person he could talk about was Zayn, even though Zayn refused to go out with him, so I got worried. I was worried that he was playing my little brother so it was safe to say I wasn’t thrilled when Zayn finally relented. Niall had only great things to say, he gushed about Zayn more than I had ever heard him say about anyone else, but that didn’t calm me at all. I mean, he did gush about every one of his boyfriends and I still couldn't stand them.’ Greg shook his head fondly.

 

'And then I actually met Zayn. I took one look at him and decided, yep, I was right, this is a player right here. With the dark hair, trimmed beard, black eyes  _ and  _ a leather jacket? He was just about my nightmare coming true.’ Greg laughed, a few people joining him. 'But then I spent the afternoon with them, and I got to know him better. Just like that, after few hours, I was in love with the guy.’ He said, looking over to Zayn. 'I understood how it only took my brother barely ten minutes to fall so hard head over heels for him that he spent a year not taking no for an answer. I saw Zayn excitedly asking questions about Niall’s work, oh excuse me, Niall's art, as he called it, I saw him sharing some news about new restaurant that they should try together cause he knows that Niall loves food, and in turn I saw my brother nearly kneeling at his feet, kissing his hands softly and assuring him every time Zayn felt uncomfortable.’ Greg said and hung his head for a second, overwhelmed with emotion.

 

'I saw a bond so strong that I couldn’t believe it could be possible only after a little over a year of knowing each other. But that was it, right from that moment, and today, you are still those people, I can see that your bond not only didn’t lessen, but it grew stronger with every day. And I’m so happy that we are here today, celebrating that bond, because I’m sure that you are going to make it through, I’m sure that you will grow old together and in the blink of the eye we will be here celebrating your fiftieth anniversary. I wish that for you both.’ He ended and was enveloped in a tight hug from both grooms, and everyone cheered happily before the leader of the band announced the second speech from Louis.

 

'Well it seems like we both decided to go down the memory lane,’ Louis smiled winking at Greg. 'I’ve been friends with Zayn ever since we were little kids, and yes most people perceived us as me being the one to protect him, and Zayn being the soft and vulnerable one. Little did they know that he was, and continues to be my rock, and I… I honestly wouldn’t be here without him’ he said getting choked up, Zayn squeezing his hand beside him and kissing his knuckles. Louis smiled down at him and continued, ‘When me and Zayn started uni we heard about Niall, he was a popular guy and everyone absolutely loved him. Well, you know what I’m talking about.’ Louis smiled and he could hear few cheers coming from their friends. 'And well, we both know how smooth he can be,’ he added and could see Niall going pale and hiding his face in Zayn’s neck, probably predicting what Louis was going to talk about. 'But as probably not a lot of you know, that was not always the case’ Louis concluded with evil smile watching as Zayn started to giggle while holding Niall close to him and petting his hair comfortingly.

 

'Me and Zayn went out for a beer on a Friday night our first month here in London. We didn’t know a lot of people back then, so it was just the two of us among masses of drunk King’s College students. We went up to a bar and bought two beers and scanned the place looking for any place to sit down, but well, Friday night it was all packed. And then we felt a body slide between us and order drinks in a voice that suggested they were not his first ones’ Louis laughed remembering how drunk Niall was that night. 'He got drinks but when he went to pay he realised he had lost his wallet somewhere. We watched amusedly as he tried to flirt with bartender to get him drinks for free but unfortunately the girl was completely immune, and finally Zayn, like the wonderful person he is, couldn’t stand someone else’s distress and slid his credit card, offering to pay’ the whole crowd was listening mesmerized.

 

'Niall didn’t put much of a fight instead he plastered himself all over Zayn and went for the most cliche pick up line in the book insinuating that Zayn was his Prince on a white horse and he should sweep him away to his castle that night.' Louis laughed and could see Zayn laughing as well while Niall hid his head in his hands. 

 

'Unfortunately, Zayn is not that kind of a boy so he just blushed and stuttered out a 'No thank you’. I can still remember the look of utter confusion on Niall’s face after that.' Louis smiled. 'We moved to a table that someone had abandoned and that should have been it for the night. Thank god it wasn’t. We didn't know that at the time but that day at the pub was some kind of charity competition, and you needed to pay 20 pounds to participate but if you won you could drink for free for three months. I don’t know how Niall figured that, but apparently he decided that it was the best way to grab Zayn’s attention. The first part of the contest was a push up challenge where you needed to do as many pushups as you could in three minutes while simultaneously answering questions about yourself.’ 

 

'Louis Tomlinson, I’m going to kill you.' Niall groaned, and everyone burst out with laughter.

 

'Shh baby it’s almost over’ Louis cooed at him mockingly. ‘The first thing Niall did was take off his shirt and throw it square onto Zayn’s face with a little wink, admittedly earning a few catcalls from the room. He then proceeded to answer every question with the most blatant sex suggestion he could come up with. For example, at the question of what he liked to do in his free time he said he enjoyed horseback riding with a smoldering man with dark eyes.’ Louis snorted at the memory.

 

'And it just went downhill from there. He lost another challenge because he stopped in the middle of the race when he saw some friend of ours hugging Zayn hello and stole a microphone from the guy handling the competition, yelling for him 'to get off his future husband!’ Zayn looked at Niall fondly. 'I guess we should know that he wasn’t insane like we thought he was, he was just saying the truth.’ Louis smiled softly. 'I guess I could tell you how he came by our table after every challenge boasting about his win or asking for a consolation prize when someone bested him, I could tell you that he tripped over a chair and fell flat on his ass causing a girl that was sitting next to it to spill her drink all over him when he realised we were leaving. I could also say that he walked us all the way home, covered in beer, oblivious to the fact that everyone at the pub was making fun of him, but I think he has stood enough humiliation for the day.’ Louis said, his face turning into an evil smile.

 

'The point was, we couldn't make out what happened. We heard about Niall Horan, and Niall Horan was smooth. He was not this mess that saw Zayn and freaked him out acting like an insane person. I should have known that that was the moment this guy lost his mind over my best friend, but instead I acted like a pitbull for the better part of a year.’ Louis laughed and saw Niall nodding thoughtfully. 'And contrary to what you may believe Ni, I didn’t tell this story just to make you squirm.’ Louis said looking at Niall, who leveled him with unimpressed gaze. 'Well okay, I did tell it a little bit to see you squirm,’ Louis agreed and people laughed. 'But I also told it because, from the very first time you met, Zayn was bringing out the best of you. He made you forget that you had an audience that you need to entertain and just let you be yourself, admittedly your drunken more embarrassing self but still yourself nonetheless. And you do that for him too. You challenge him to go forward instead of staying in the same place, you show him that change is good, that it means you’re growing and evolving, and well, as a pitbull of a best friend - I couldn’t ask for anyone better to be his husband. So thank you, for taking care of my rock. I love you both beyond words.’ 

 

He put down the microphone and kissed both Zayn and Niall before everyone toasted to the grooms and made them kiss for about fifteen minutes. 

 

It was already evening and the atmosphere was getting more and more relaxed. After a few hours Louis could see Lottie dancing, already barefoot with Blake, Jordan and Liam dry humping on the dancefloor, Liam wearing his tie tied around his forehead like some kind of discount Rambo. Zayn and Niall were enveloped in each other swaying softly even though the music that was currently playing was Uptown Funk. They didn’t seem to notice with their foreheads pressed together and hands adorned with brand new silver rings, clutching each other’s waist. 

 

Louis looked around at how happy everyone seemed to be. Seemed being the key word. He knew that it wasn't like that. That everyone here had their problems, but yet here they were in the middle of the night dancing with the ones they loved and just letting themselves be happy. Even just for a second. And.. couldn’t it be that easy?

 

His gaze found Harry standing on the other side of the dance floor, his jacket, black scarf and a fedora long forgotten. He was now simply in black pants and black sheer shirt that, surprise, surprise was unbuttoned to his belly button. He looked at Louis with soft smile, his head tilted to the side a little. 

 

In true movie-esque fashion the band switched to a softer song to entertain all the couples that were already slow dancing, and Louis and Harry moved towards each other at the same time. Louis’ steps were laced with determination, but he didn’t rush it. He sauntered over slowly, meeting Harry halfway in the middle of the dancefloor.

 

‘Okay so let me tell you, that story about how they met was funny, but it wasn’t nearly as funny as you made it out to be.’ Harry teased when Louis came to stand right up against him.

 

Louis just assessed him from head to toe before bringing his hand to Harry’s face, caressing his cheek softly and watching as Harry leaned into the touch.

 

'Can it just be simple?’ he asked softly, barely above a whisper. 'Because I have so many complicated things in my life, and I don’t want this to be another one.’ he said and saw as Harry looked up at him with something like hope in his eyes. 'I tried to wait for the right moment or… spare you from all my problems, but… I like you. I really fucking like you. So can we? Can we just be simple?’ 

 

Harry grinned madly at him before snatching Louis by his waist and bringing him closer. 'Yeah. Let’s be simple’ he whispered, resting his forehead on Louis’.

 

'You want this? Me?’ Louis asked, his brain still supplying him with a fair amount of doubt.

 

'I do.’ Harry answered simply, his breath ghosting over Louis’ lips, before Louis broke and connected them. 

 

So maybe Harry can’t make him better, and maybe his presence can’t actually cure Louis or suddenly make everything bad in his life go away. Maybe being with him won’t mean that he’s all fixed, but Zayn did have a point, some things do make you feel warm and happy inside. Some things do make you feel like you’ve made it. 

 

This kiss was that. Louis was home.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this was the last chapter. To everyone who feels that it's sounds unfinished that's because it is. There WILL BE epilogue coming. I'm just not sure whether the epilogue will be one more chapter or a full blown sequel, so for now the story stands on it's own :)
> 
> There are few things coming from me, my first fic from fic exchange will have it's author reveal in a few days, the second one will be posted in January AND I'm starting my next chaptered fic, the first one should be up soon since I'm basically finished with the first chapter and then just beta it and we're good to go.
> 
> So from the bottom of my heart, thank you so so so much, for reading this story, for pestering me about updates (that's how I know you care haha) there is honestly nothing better than people actually loving your writting, thank you thank you thank you! xx.


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